(30/F/5'6"/175) I am about 30lbs overweight and this is the worst I have ever felt about my body and my self esteem is so low. My partner admitted they do not find me as attractive and we aren't really romantic anymore. I have my own intimacy issues due to self esteem - but I feel like why be romantic with them if they clearly aren't jumping at the bit? The issue is two-fold. It makes me worry about the future - if I gain weight again or gain weight from having a baby, how can this relationship work? The idea of gaining so much weight from pregnancy and having him feel this way again in the future makes me not even want to have kids. Is this normal in relationships or is my partner just really shallow and needs to grow up? Obviously I want my partner to find me attractive and I understand I don't look like I did when we first started dating (we've been together for nearly 10 years). Any advice on how to navigate these troubled waters are welcome. My partner is a great person - very kind, intelligent, we have so much in common, have a home/dogs together and have such great support from family and friends. We have agreed to do other things to benefit our relationship like going to therapy individually (both have our own things we want to work on for the benefit of our relationship and ourselves) and doing more things together so we feel we are supporting one another (and they told me they want to support me in my weight loss journey and want to work on our relationship). I just feel very lost and alone, and I can't talk to any friends or family because I don't want to worry them or unintentionally change the way my family/friends feel about my partner. I also want to keep this private for now until we determine if our relationship can work (if its not my weight, maybe its something else we can't fix and should move on). I guess I'm feeling like my weight has a lot more to do with the fizzle in the relationship than anything else and it's hard to grapple with emotionally. Thank you for reading this and any advice or just comments would be greatly appreciated.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3fT56Ma
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