40 years later - this time it will work

Posting for accountability but also for some blunt honesty with myself and would love feedback / tips / all of it.

I was raised on fad diets in the 70s/80s. My mom during my life was a 10-16 size, gym teacher, and nutritionist who missed her size 6 self and yo yo dieted until she was 70 and got bariatric surgery (which is a whole other thing). But pick a fad diet and I tried it.

I was an active kid on the chubby side but not extended clothes sizing. Water skiing, swimming, dance class, aerobics videos, weightlifting, cross country running, gymnastics for fun - you name it I probably loved it. Growing up in and around gyms didn’t hurt. Get bored - play on the parallel bars. It was all still just play. We ate… ok. Everything was microwaved. Lots of diet soda and processed food. My parents are ice cream every night. Portions were… Midwestern.

When I started college I had a cafeteria plan and 1000% less activity even though I walked / biked everywhere and had some dance classes. And I gained 120lbs. And then the next summer I went on birth control - and gained another 50.

Since then (1993?) I’ve been mostly within 20lbs above to below the 300 mark. There was a moment in the early / mid 2000s where I did Atkins for 3 years (and lived in a 4th floor walk up) and lost 120lbs. But the depression from nutritional gaps was real. So I tried to go back to more balanced eating and … within about 3 years… back to the 300 line.

My wife, my friends are all naturally thin people. We have a pretty active life - I’m 5000 steps a day on average during the work week and 8-10k on the weekends.

Now I’m in my early 50s and my body is unhappy about carrying this weight. I seem to tweak / injure my knee about 2x a year, my ankles constantly give me pain, my back always hurts, and I find myself begging off of fun things I used to love because I’m worried about pain or injury.

I have the shoe inserts and compression socks which help but damn.

So about a month ago I joined the gym. Have made it in 1-4x a week since. I’m trying to figure out how to enable my friends to help. I don’t want to be whiny or seem weak but also - I don’t want this to kill me or impair my mobility. I love to travel, dance, perform on stage (I’m a musician), walk everywhere - and right now carrying this weight is hurting my quality of life so much. I want to let it go.

Somehow this feels different than other years. I don’t want it to be just another fad diet like when I was a kid.

I tried ozembic a few years ago but stopped it b/c I was afraid of the blindness side effect. I tried metformin but couldn’t tolerate the side effects (and it didn’t help much). I tried one of the speedier weight loss drugs and ended up in afib. Contrave wasn’t impactful. I’m asking my dr re monjauro when she is back from vacation.

This journey feels so hard and also - I’m ready to start it. Not for vanity but for longevity. Every day is a choice. Wish me luck!

What have you found helpful for your friends / spouses to do to support your journey? I want to ask for help but… what can they do when the choices are all mine ?

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Constantly being cold after weight loss?

Hi,

after giving birth 7 weeks ago I am now trying to lose my pregnancy weight and possibly 20-30kg on top of that.

I‘ve read up on common things people experience after losing weight, and the most frequent thing I read was that you’re basically going to feel cold constantly. Right now, I’m already freezing almost all the time because of hormonal changes and it‘s awful - granted, it’s probably much better than being obese, but still.

Is this true? Is there any way to prevent it? I‘d be delighted to hear about your experiences.

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Should I slow down my weight loss?

Like many people I (26F) want to lose some weight this year! I’m 5’6 and want to go slowly to keep things sustainable, so I’m aiming for about .5 pounds per week. I can handle some hunger but don’t want to be starving all the time with a ton of food noise lol.

I weighed 171.8 on 12/29 and I weighed in today (1/3) at 166.8. That’s a 5 pound weight loss that I’m sure is a combo of water, less food in my stomach, and a bit of fat loss too. I REALLY don’t want this to be a pattern and want the weight loss to be slower. Should I try eating a bit more this week? Or should I just keep doing what I’m doing and see if the scale keeps going down too quickly? I think I need more data over the next few weeks but need some advice

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is there any chance my loose skin will get better? im feeling so defeated right now.....

i started antidepressants in 2024, and gained 50-60lbs in about 7 months, going from around 130 to almost 190. i was at my heaviest at the end of 2024, and by october/November 2025 had lost about 50lbs, and have been sitting at 140 consistently. im 5'1 for reference. i had changed meds many times and finally landed on wellbutrin which caused significant weight loss after multiple other ssris had made me gain all the weight incredibly fast. the weightloss really came from major loss of appetite bc of the wellbutrin, which i was super happy about because i hated how i looked and how heavy i was. but now, my skin is sooo much flabbier. i thought i would be happy but i hate the way i look now. i used to be so toned and was under 115 most of my life, my boobs were perky and now i have stretch marks and look so saggy and deflated everywhere. im only 25 and look like ive had multiple kids now. my stomach looks super flabby and i just feel so gross. do i just need more time, or is my skin fucked now? will my boobs ever be perky again? or do i just have to live with how wrecked my body looks? this shit literally makes me want to k*ll myself sometimes with how self conscious i am now. i feel like i've completely ruined myself and theres nothing i can do about it..... anyone have any encouragement or advice for me?

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7 years after weight gain - this year I’m finally all in

I’ve struggled massively with my weight since Covid hit. Prior to the lockdowns I was working out 5 days a week and kept my weight off for 8 years. Maintained 135lbs that whole time. But then when Covid hit I continued to gain weight. I also went back to school at age 30 and had fluctuations in losing and gaining.

I weighed myself on NYE and was absolutely heartbroken at what I saw. I currently sit at 177lbs and have only 2 pairs of jeans that I fit in.

At the start of 2025 I was committed to getting back into shape and gained quite a bit of muscle. My mistake was not counting calories. I assumed I was eating enough to lose weight - and so I went from 165 to 177 in about 3 months from October to December.

Joining this group and reading all of your experiences have really woken me up to the fact that you HAVE to count calories. Since the 1st I have been and I’ve been so shocked seeing how much food is in 1500 calories and that I really have been overeating for years! (I joke though and say I’ve just been in bulking season for the last year haha).

If any of you are feeling down like me, start counting your calories. Especially if you’re already active. I look forward to checking in with myself 6 months from now and I finally believe that I can achieve my goal of 135-140 again because I’m 100% dialled in.

If any of you have tips that helped with your weight loss I’d love to hear them.

Wishing all of you an awesome 2026 and don’t get discouraged !!

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What are your thoughts on juicing?

I have a friend who swears by juicing as a meal replacement to cut calories.

She says it helps her lose weight and cut fat, and she's not concerned about sugar intake as much as she is with cutting calories in general.

I want to know people's thoughts on this. I don't really think it is a safe or sustainable option myself but it's working for her and I have to lose some weight by March to help make my wedding dress alterations easier. Not much, the dress fits almost perfectly but there's a lot of dimpling in the fabric that would be eased by weight loss.

So far, I have tried focusing on water intake, being mindful of portions, snacking etc. I think I do so much better than I used to on physical activity. I go to the gym usually every other day and I never skip more than 2 days. Even with help from the Mayo Clinic Diet since August, I've only lost 3 lbs and I canceled that diet plan because of cost.

What am I missing? Is there a strategy I'm not thinking of for better weight loss results? Does anyone here actually like juicing?

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Skin feels softer and looser- Am I actually losing fat?

I started off my somewhat serious weight loss journey at I think around fall last year at 320-ish lbs (26 F, heavily symptomatic of PCOS, sedentary but have been more careful when it comes to a balanced diet). While I don't THINK I actually lost enough weight to tell a massive difference quite yet, I definetely feel like my skin is a little looser and not as tight. My lower stomach especially has been sagging and I can pick it up and slap it on a desk like bongos LMAO. It's not so loose that it's LOOSE skin, but enough that it feels like the subcutaneous fat isn't as firm and can be quite jiggly. If I move the skin around, I can be more flexible in things like picking up socks off the ground without having to bend down on my knees. I also have that on my arms and my thighs are EXTREMELY flabby, although they've always been flabby so I dunno how true it holds with them.

Is this an expected outcome for extensive fat loss, or a symptom of weight GAIN? I don't have a scale with me (Which is good otherwise I would obsess over my weight more than I currently do), but I do plan on getting one later once I feel more of a difference. For now, I'm wearing a 4XL shirt (I normally wear a 3XL) and enjoying fitting nicely in my clothes for once haha.

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