Setback due to depression and grief

Mostly rambling, looking for support, helpful tips.

I’ve been having a bitch of a time getting and staying under 215. I just completed a 4 month weight loss group class through the VA. I have the hardest time sticking to goals like steps, and the healthy plate.

I went overseas for two weeks and immersed. I didn’t see people in the country I visited eating outside of restaurants. Nobody eating while walking, on the train, in their cars, etc. I did the same, felt great, decided to take it home. I’ve been hearing for so long how eating at the table and having your food be the only thing you’re doing makes such a big difference for appetite and satiety, and it totally does!

I lost the pound I gained on the trip within a week. I was more consistently under my calorie goal.

Then I put my cat down, who was my baby. Appetite is dysregulated. This morning, I wasn’t hungry at breakfast so I didn’t eat. I got hungry at work and ate jerky at my desk. Last night, I ate 2 cheese squares and leftover Indian food in front of the TV, a total of 600 calories. It put me well over my calorie goal.

Of course the next meal is another chance, but the emotional cravings and appetite dysregulation are really something. I spend time at my baby girl’s memorial every day, I cry when I feel like it, I’m sleeping all I want.

I don’t want to go back to eating away from the table and outside of meal/snacktimes, because having that time and place has been so impactful. I’m going to get back on that horse. I’m just struggling right now, man.

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