How did perceptions change specifically?

M, 255lbs, 5’11 and half, 26

Basically rn I’m quite frustrated as I’ve improved SO much about myself so far tbh.

I’m running way more, hitting gym, wearing some better clothes, skincare, good hygiene, keeping room clean, better organised, got a good conventions but nice hair and good beard, all well maintained and trimmed and so on. Even dating a bit/trying to.

I’m becoming less pathetic/goofy in my own eyes, but that doesn’t change anyone else’s. I feel better about myself a bit, but I still feel GOOFY.

That’s the right word. I HOPE it’s my weight. Like I’ve always hoped losing that would conclude feeling big and goofy and clownish, but idk anymore.

I see people sometimes who just look hot/respectable. They are cleaner, better dressed still, better bodies ofc, but just sharper as a whole.

I feel like I stumble about and get mocked/looked down upon. Like my physicality is laughable. My weight loss is going okay. 20lbs lost, but that’s over a fair amount of time now and I’ve maintained at this current weight for a while even with the increased exercise. I get it’s all diet but idk, it’s frustrating.

I just want to know if people did 180’s. I want to be that attractive sharp guy. My family are all big and broad and we all have big heads and stuff, and I feel very much that way. Like I like being my height (not even tall but it’s fine) and I don’t hate being broad (could be good with body recomp and muscles, and weight loss ofc) but it just makes me feel so goofy Christ. I feel like Jimmy for GTA 5 (cringe reference) or some other type like that when I want to be more Matt Bomer from white collar or something. Not those references exactly but the difference between goofy and suave.

I used to be prodded in the stomach in school and it still feels like that could be done to me. Or verbally even, like my stomachs so big and I’m so out there in public anyone could do that.

Anyway, feel like I said the same thing over and over there for a bit. Would appreciate advice if people felt the same way.

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