I’m 23 and I’ve already spent 12 years trying to lose weight

23F 5ft 5in SW: 210 CW: 159 GW: 135

Long time lurker here. I’m just venting and telling my story but I’d love to hear your experiences too.

I started getting bullied for being “fat” when I was 11. My parents told me I’d be beautiful if I lost weight. Eating was my comfort when I came home from a long horrible day at school. The more I got called fat, the more weight I gained.

I joined weight watchers with my sister at 13. I was barely old enough and had to get a doctors note to join. I lost 25 lbs, quit and joined again at 15. I quit again and gained the weight back plus a whole lot more.

During my first year of college at 16 I gained 50lbs and when I was 17 I decided that I had enough of being the “fat girl”. I lost 70lbs in a year and a half fuelled by hatred and disgust and I had never looked better but I had never felt worse.

I never let myself eat the foods I liked, I berated myself in the mirror every day as motivation. I cried every time the MyFitnessPal calorie counter turned red or when I hit the calorie balance and went to bed hungry. I held onto that weight for dear life for 4 years until the pandemic hit and I gained back 20lbs since March 2020.

I’m 23 now and I realised that the last 12 years of my life completely revolved around weight loss.

I’m done berating myself in the mirror. I’m done hating myself to a lower weight.

I’ve lost 3lbs in the past few weeks eating the foods that I like, allowing myself to enjoy a birthday party without being upset about my calorie count, looking at myself in the mirror and saying only positive things, exercising when I can and resting when I need to. I’ve realised that it’s possible to be happy and lose weight at the same time lol what a revelation!

I want to get back to my lowest weight in a way that’s healthy for my mind too this time. 24lbs to go.

I guess the point of this post is to maybe help someone not make the same mistake I did thinking you can hate yourself to your goal weight then magically be happy.

Thanks for reading my wall of text if anyone did.

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Tip for people who struggle with night eating

For most of my life, my nightly ritual has always been to grab a bowl of cereal, watch TV for a bit, and then go to bed. Every time I've tried to lose weight in the past, I've told myself "No more food at night," and I always end up giving in to my cravings because it just makes me happy to do that routine. One of my very fit friends has been helping me lose weight recently, and he offered this solution: "Why not just save some calories for the end of the day so you can have your bowl of cereal and not go over on your calories?" I've been doing exactly that for a month now and I'm making great progress on my weight loss goal. I simply make sure I have an extra 300-400 calories left at the end of the day and I can have my bowl of cereal! I find that it motivates me to make good choices during the day because if I overeat for lunch or dinner, I can't have my cereal.

It might not be the ideal solution for night eaters, but I'm losing weight without giving up something that makes me happy/comfortable, so I see that as a win!

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Here's my weight loss plan. Trying to go from 115kg to 99kg

Background first.

I was always heavy. A couple of years ago, when I started my career and moved out, I was at 128kg and I got all the way down to a low of 95kg after only a year. I then balanced out at 99kg when I eased my regime and that's a weight I'm happy with.

Last year I returned to the family home after my job went work-from-home and unfortunately went back to old habits (lots of junk, bedtime feasting, no activity) and have gone back up to 115kg.

I have done this before so I can do it again and now that life is returning to normal (I expect to move out and go back to the office most of the week by the end of September) I have some urgency and a target to reach - my non-scale victories are the shirts and t-shirts I would wear to work which no longer fit and also a slim fit suit that I wore to my Brother's wedding in December 2019.

Here's my plan, it's a mix of intermittent fasting and low carb with daily exercise:

Meals:

No food before 4pm, just water and black coffee.

4pm - snack before I workout, mostly eggs and ham with a small piece of soda bread.

8pm - a normal meal (carbs ok). I don't really have control of dinner since at home I only cook it once a week, but I try to keep the portion to a medium and not eat so much carbs

No more food until bed time around midnight.

Exercise:

Gym every weekday - about 40 minutes of cardio machines, some light abs and restistance machines and occasionally heavier weights but not so often.

Swim - There's a pool at my gym. I will swim for 20 to 30 minutes maybe 3 times a week.

On the weekends I might not go to the gym, but I do go for a longer swim on Saturdays. Sunday is a rest but I do try to do something active like a long walk.

---

I have been doing this for 3 weeks so far and results are good so far. The fasting is not difficult and the exercise is great. I am starting to see differences all ready, haven't lost much mass yet but my torso area is a little more loose and soft. I haven't weighed myself because my scales are broken (going to get new ones soon).

Very optimistic so far, I am on track I think for a noticeable difference by mid September. Hoping to get under 100kg by Christmas time.

Edit - btw, male, 28, 6 foot tall

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The danger of selective tracking or how I set myself up for failure

Hi guys! You probably remember me from the crying-next-to-the-pool post!

Over the last couple years, I've been experiencing a lot of weight fluctuations. I went from 202lbs to 171 and now I'm back to 187. It's definitely frustrating and it caused me a lot of emotional distress lately. Earlier in June, I decided I was going to get back on track but even though I made the conscious decision to do so, I felt like I needed to try a different approach this time.

So, I have been on vacation for two weeks now and being away from my routine and my work has allowed me to reflect on those years gone by. Summer vacation has always been the perfect time to reflect on the past year and the new goals I would like to achieve.

Each year the goal is the same: to lose weight. And every year the conclusion is the same: I failed.

This summer started like any other. I cried because I felt fat and inadequate. I cried when I noticed that I no longer fit in my favorite summer clothes. I cried before attending to social events. Two weeks passed and I finally got tired of crying in front of my mirror.

And that's when I realized I needed to do something I've never done: it was time to study my failure. But like study, study. I needed to do a lot of introspections and understand what lead me to this. I mean how come I'm still not at a healthy weight/shape/BMI after two years of "effort" ?!

So I thought about it. A lot. For the first time in three years, I decided to look at my journey from an outside perspective. I decided to check all my weight loss tools' history.
I studied my lose it history, I went over my journal entries. I looked at my weight stats and my Apple Watch history. And suddenly it hit me like a brick wall.

I couldn't trust any available data because I've been lying to myself all this time. There were time holes and a lot of missing datas. And I knew exactly why. Cause I never tracked accurately. I would only log healthy foods, I would only keep track of calories and workout sessions on good days. I never logged in binge-eating sessions, never kept track on the rainy days. I would never count my calories on "bad days" when I would eat tons of fast-food and processed food. I was so dishonest with myself that after two years of weight-loss journey, I was still wondering how come I failed so hard when in reality, it's so obvious why!

The reality is that I tried to outrun a bad diet, I tried to act like bad days didn't exist. I only made efforts 25% of the time!!! I only invested 25% of myself!! I decided to not track the binge-eating sessions so I could pretend they didn't exist. I basically decided to fool myself 70% of the time and then complained about not being able to lose weight and "plateau-ing"!!!!

So I decided that this year was going to be different. This new life is going to be different. I am not going to lie to myself anymore cause that's what lead me to this day. I'm going to look straight at it, the good, the bad and the ugly. This is my hold-me-accountable post.

I thought my conclusion could be helpful to some of you guys!

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One of those holding myself accountable posts lol

I’m sure you all know the procedure now haha but 20F 5’6 SW: 225lbs CW:194lbs GW: 174lbs (for now!)

I started my weight loss journey when I was 17/18, did low carb, lost a bunch of weight, gained it back, lost it again but was battling with overexercising, bulimia, orthorexia etc etc so even though I lost that weight I felt miserable.

Somehow I managed to stagnate and maintain the weight I lost for the past 1 1/2 years or so but I am slowly gaining it back so I’m trying to start this again before it goes completely downhill again. Im doing IF alternating between 16:8, 18:6, 20:4 again, trying to start Keto/low carb again today but I might stick with low carb around 50-70g of carbs because 20g carb limit made my ED aggravated. I need to start walking more, and need to implement a better exercise routine but I’m mostly focused on diet for now

I’m deciding to do this because I deserve a better future, one where I am happy and food doesn’t control me, nor do my health conditions due to obesity. I hope I keep on reminding myself of that and that I deserve this, I am truly the only obstacle that separates me from my goals.

I will get this journey started and back on the road again. Wish me luck :)

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[SV] Down 20 lbs

F/24/ 5'4"

• SW: 306.6

• CW: 285.8

• GW: ???

Total loss of 20.8

Just doing a quick post because I'm pretty proud of myself! I started on May 19th and I last weighed myself on Aug 10th so its been a bit less than 3 months. I'm down a little over 20lbs and it's been really great! My clothes are fitting looser and I've lost a lot of my double chin lol. I'm also more flexible, less sore, and can be on my feet longer without pain.

I've been doing CICO this whole time, my net average is about 1550–1700 cal a day. Kinda slow but progress is progress. Someone on here reached out to me and suggested we be accountability buddies and it's been really nice, it's comforting to talk about weight loss, food habits, goals, and anxieties with someone else. I've also noticed that my sister is doing some calorie counting as well so that's another person that I can mutually support :)

I still having trouble getting exercise in though since I have a sedentary job + online school and introvert hobbies. My step count averages around 3k :/ I've been doing light exercises though, mostly squats, standing ab exercises, and arm weight exercises (5lbs, I think I need to go up to 8?) and I plan on getting a yearly pass to the community center which has a pool and a fitness room because I love swimming (even if I'm a slow swimmer)

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The Way You View Exercise

I'm sure I'm not the only one so I'd like to share what I've learned over many, many years of using exercise as punishment. I'd look in the mirror or step on the scale and see something I hated so I punished myself with exercise, hours and hours of cardio to "teach" myself a lesson. But now that I know a whole lot more about weight loss and I want to enjoy being active, I've had to retrain myself to view exercise as a tool that can make me feel better. There's obviously so much more to weight loss than just looking good, you want to feel good too, but my 14 year old self didn't exactly care about that second part. I stopped thinking about how I needed to workout in order to burn calories and instead set goals for myself that made working out both a fun challenge and a now useful component on days I feel mentally fatigued. I no longer dread working out because a) I know it doesn't have to be on a treadmill or mindlessly counting reps (seriously though any tips to make the treadmill less boring would be appreciated) and b) I enjoy seeing my progress throughout my workouts by adding more reps, being able to run longer or faster, etc.

Weaponizing exercise meant that I had turned something that supposed to be good for me into something that made food the enemy. I eat, I workout, but I don't tie the two together anymore in that negative light. I'm allowed to enjoy food and I'm allowed to mess up, but at the end of the day all that matters is that I continue to try and improve.

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