1 step forward, 2 steps back

29 Y/O Male 6’1” 275lbs for reference.

Looking for advice

I’ve practiced the art of calorie tracking for roughly 11 years. I’ve had success and I acknowledge it works however I have never managed to stick to a calorie deficit for longer than 3-4 months. I’ve never leaned out to the point where I’ve revealed my ab muscles but I’ve been in above average shape in my early 20s as a result of weight training and tracking calories.

I’ve tried all the fads and exercises. I’ve kept it stupid simple as well. 2-3 times a year I make an attempt at weight loss but it seems that I never manage to sustain this as a lifestyle. This has been going on for years and although I plan to keep trying, I’m starting to feel hopeless. I feel as if I may never reach my goal. I’ve even started to gain interest in GLP-1s because I’ve heard others share stories of their success after struggling for years. Am I making a mistake by even considering these medications? Or should I take the leap and give it a try? Does anyone have any wisdom or similar experiences that might resonate with me?

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Frustrated with the last 15 lbs

I (39F) lost 20 lbs earlier this year by weighing all my food, logging it in my fitness pal, walking every day, and drinking tons of water. I plateaued for a couple weeks so decided to take a break from weight loss and get comfortable with a maintenance diet for a while.

Fast forward 4 months later. I was able to keep all that weight off so I decided to start up the diet again to lose the last 15 lbs. I’ve been doing everything EXACTLY the same- same routine, same daily calories, the only difference is I’m now working out 4x per week. It’s been three weeks and I have not lost a single pound. I can’t wrap my head around it and I’m getting so discouraged! Does anyone have suggestions or a possible explanation for what’s going on??

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Dancing Queen

Hellooooo everyone

In February I weighed 102 kg (225 lb). I’m now around 76 kg (168 lb) at 172 cm (5’8”) so I’ve lost about 26 kg/57 lb in roughly 6 months.

The problem is that I lost the weight in a particularly unhealthy or unsustainable way.

Over the past several months I got heavily into the techno/party scene. At my peak I was going out 2–3 times a week sometimes dancing for 6–7+ hours straight and sometimes going to afterparties until 10 or 11 AM. There were periods where I was probably dancing for 18+ hours per week.
At the same time I started using drugs including Molly/MDMA, ketamine and other substances and I was also smoking a lot of cigarettes.

I wasn’t intentionally starving myself. In fact I used to be someone who ate quite a lot especially when stressed or angry. But my appetite basically disappeared. Even foods I used to LOVE especially fast food stopped appealing to me.

So obviously the combination of much more physical activity, partying, substances and having very little appetite resulted in a huge amount of weight loss.
I also suspect I’ve lost some muscle along the way. My legs are relatively muscular from all the dancing but otherwise I feel like I’ve lost a lot of muscle as well as fat.

I’m trying to slow everything down now. I’ve gone from partying several times a week to roughly once a month over the last few months. I’m also trying to reduce my drug use although I’m struggling with that part because I find it very difficult to say no when I’m in that environment.

My biggest fear now is what happens when my appetite comes back and I stop partying/drug use?

I’m currently very close to what I consider my goal weight. At 172 cm and 76 kg, my BMI is around 25.7. I’d need to lose roughly 2–3 kg to get below the standard BMI “overweight” cutoff. Ideally I’d like to eventually be around 70 kg but I’m much more concerned about maintaining a healthy weight than getting there as quickly as possible.

I also realized how dramatic the change has been because my parents live in Canada and I only see them about twice a year. My mom saw me in March and then again in July and she was genuinely shocked by how different I looked because I’d lost so much weight.

So I have a few questions:

Has anyone here experienced significant weight loss because of substance use, loss of appetite or an extremely active lifestyle and then stopped/reduced the substances or lifestyle that caused it?

Did your appetite come back?
Did you gain weight afterward?
If you did how much?
Were you able to maintain most of the weight loss?
How did you rebuild your appetite and eating habits?
Did you need to follow a specific diet or exercise routine?
And did you regain muscle after getting back to a more normal lifestyle?

I’m not looking for advice on how to continue losing weight through drugs or partying quite the opposite. I know that this isn’t a healthy way to lose weight and I’m trying to move away from it.

I’m mainly scared that I’ve accidentally lost a huge amount of weight through a lifestyle that I can’t/shouldn’t maintain and that once my appetite and normal routine return I’ll immediately gain everything back.
I’d really appreciate hearing from anyone who has been through something similar.
Be safe ! Love you all 🫶

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What’s a weight-loss “rule” you believed for years that turned out to be BS?

Mine was thinking one bad meal meant I already “ruined the day” 😂
I’d eat something off plan and basically say screw it, I’ll start again tomorrow. Then one meal would turn into a whole day of eating whatever because I felt like the damage was already done.
Eventually I realized one meal barely matters compared with what I do the rest of the week. Getting back to normal at the next meal helped me way more than trying to be perfect all the time.
I’ve also changed my mind on a lot of the little rules people repeat around weight loss. Stuff like certain foods being automatically bad, having to eat at certain times, or thinking every day has to be perfect.
What’s one weight-loss rule you used to believe that you completely changed your mind about?

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Weight loss advice

I am a 20 year old women , 206 pounds, 5’7. I have let myself go these past couple of months. I want to lock in and be consistent and disciplined. I have so much good noise. I have 23 days to lose weight/fat for a family get together. I just want to feel more confident and look a little slimmer. I want to lose at least 10 pounds. I know it probably won’t be sustainable in the long run but I just need it for this vacation. Has anyone done this before does it seem possible? Thanks in advance and if you have nothing helpful to say pls….dont. lol.

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Thermodynamics is real, and you can’t argue with it

Today I’m down 90lbs from my heaviest weight. I’m 7lbs from just being “overweight”. I’ve been obese for over 30 years. I’ve tried so many “diets” it’s not even funny. There were a lot of fad diets in the early 90s that my parents put me on. Since becoming an adult I’ve tried hcG, Atkins, keto, vegetarian diets, and at least half a dozen more random ones. I always gave up because I hated what I had to eat. People talk about how hard it is restricting what you eat. I agree, it really is.

I’ve learned in the last two years that what you eat matters less than how much you eat. I see all kinds of garbage about “clean eating” (whatever the hell that means, I blame Panera) or only eating whole foods. That’s garbage. You can do those things and still not lose weight if you are not in a deficit. You can also eat whatever you like (within reason) and still lose weight, as long as you are in a deficit. I eat out, I eat fast food, I enjoy desserts. I just set myself a weekly calorie goal and cycle my intake to not exceed that and I lose weight. I do prioritize protein because I’m also building muscle, but the key is knowing what you’re putting in your body and how much of it.

The other saying is also true: most weight loss is in the kitchen, not the gym. I do strength training 2-3 times a week, max. I don’t spend more than an hour each session. I also walk 1.5-2.5 miles 3-5 times a week. But that’s it. I don’t kill myself. I don’t spend 3-4 hours a day.

You can’t do it if you don’t know how much you consume. And you can’t guess. I am fairly meticulous with my calorie tracking, but it is definitely harder when you eat out (can’t really break out the scale at Black Angus). But it can be done.

Also one side note: GLP-1s can help, but that’s it. They can’t do it for you. I actually got to my heaviest while on a GLP-1 (I’m diabetic). I’ve been on them for 7 years. I’ve lost the vast majority of my weight in the last 18 months. But only because I decided what was important and knuckled down. I’ve still got probably 30lbs until I’m happy, but I feel better than I have for decades.

One other caveat: medications can mess with your progress. At suggestion of my doctor I removed one of my medications and my insulin resistance went up and I plateaued for almost six months, despite being in a deficit. Once that was resolved I started losing again.

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I didn't even lose that much weight and the life changes have been crazy

I don't think it's entirely down to weight loss, as my starting weight wasn't that high, but, I lost ~2 dress sizes (solid size 10 to largeish size 6), so it's not insignificant. But I think the bigger changes came from eating better and getting fit. I no longer feel tired from opening heavy doors. Yesterday I made whipped cream by hand and my arms aren't even sore today. I have way more mental energy, so I've been picking up hobbies that I wouldn't engage in before (brain games, world news, language learning). Walking and exercising a lot has had a huge positive impact on my mood (and cutting out added sugars), so I feel way more calm and happy all the time. Having better mood made me more motivated to work on myself, so I started looking for self-help materials and I am much better at advocating for myself now. It probably doesn't hurt that people do treat you a bit nicer when you're down 2 dress sizes. The positive transformation of my life has been wild.

There are a few downsides too - I kind of lost a close friend in this process because I was getting much healthier and they were not, and while part of it is I got fit and they did not (and they have a lot of barriers preventing them from getting healthier so I'm not blaming them), I think the bigger part is my mental landscape just looks so different compared with how it was a year ago.

So, I sort of just want people to know if you stick with it - eating better and getting more fit, it can really transform your life. People talk a lot about the outside changes, but if you change your outsides the insides can also change a lot as well.

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