This is not meant to be a discouraging post, but more of a "please don't let this happen to you" one.
Everyone has something that motivates them to lose weight. Here's how my motivation failed me.
I've always been a fat kid. When I was around 16, I started thinking about sex, girls, and all that stuff. And I realized that being 270lbs won't bring me any because all the guys I saw girls chasing were the nicely built, muscular-type guys.
There was a girl I had liked for more than 10 years in my classroom. She also liked my best friend, who had the same athletic build everyone seemed to crave.
I just..wanted that. I wanted to have that frame, to get that look from girls. So I decided to do something about it, because I wanted to have a girl and thought I'd otherwise die alone.
Over the course of two years, I radically changed. I became that guy, driven by the sole purpose of finding a girlfriend that likes my newfound six pack abs, athletic build, big chest, biceps, etc.
I lost around 120 lbs. I felt awesome. I was confident,powerful, and I felt like I could do anything I would set my mind to. I felt like I could move mountains.
I learned some pick-up stuff as well to alter my natural shyness, and started going out a lot.
Somehow, that girl I liked for 10 years became mg girlfriend. It was everything I could ever wish for, and the best part was that I had worked for it to become this way.
But once I found myself in the relationship, my flame stopped burning as well.
Because I motivated myself with the purpose of finding a girlfriend, I stopped fighting once I had her. I relaxed. I started eating crap. I felt like my mission was complete.
We broke up. I became a beast again. I hooked up with another girl. I relaxed.
We broke up. I became a beast again. I hooked up with another girl. I relaxed.
And we didn't break up. We've been together for 2.5 years now. And I've been severely relaxed for 2 of those years. I've been so severely relaxed that I woke up this morning, weighed myself, and I weigh exactly 270lbs again. I look exactly how I used to.
And I know. I know that I'm to blame for this, but I also know that my motivation for weight loss was wrong and it caused this entire bullshit cascade. my relaxation periods of time were appearing whenever I was in a relationship because I maintained that goal of "be a beast to find a girl"and whenever I found her, I felt like my mission was complete and started unknowingly messing myself up.
So please, take care of what motivates you. Don't let yourselves rely on the external factors of life, such as finding a girlfriend or whatever. These change.
Focus on becoming more confident. Focus on looking at yourself in the mirror and liking what you see. Focus on feeling better. These situations are completely in your control. But losing weight for other people's approval? Fuck no. Because once you get it, you feel like you've done enough.
I feel horrible now. I started going to the gym again 2 weeks ago, and I feel horrible for letting myself revert 2 years of dedication and pain. But I know I'll get back there.
And this time, it'll be for all the right reasons.
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