Monday, November 2, 2026

Weight loss & optimizing muscle mass (6'0" / 1m83, 365 lbs / 166kg): 100% Cardio or Lifting + Cardio?

Hi everyone!

​I'm a 25M, 1m83 (6'0") and 166kg (365 lbs). My goal is to lose weight while keeping, or even optimizing, my muscle mass (I naturally have a pretty "bulky" build). I'm managing my calorie intake, but I want to optimize my fat loss through the gym.

​I've been going to the gym for a month now, and I keep hearing two completely opposite things:

​100% Cardio: I've been told to avoid weightlifting entirely. Because in a deficit, my body will burn both fat AND muscle, ruining my frame.

​Heavy Lifting + Light Cardio (5-10 min): I was told that muscle requires more energy at rest. By building strength, my body will hold onto the muscle and target the fat instead.

​Personally, I'm leaning towards the 2nd option. Since I have a busy schedule, I go to the gym twice a week and use guided machines. Right now, I'm doing a Full Body split like this:

​Day 1: Push focus (Chest, shoulders, triceps, quads).

​Day 2: Pull focus (Back, rear delts, biceps, hamstrings).

​End of each session: 5-10 mins of light cardio.

​What are your thoughts on this? Do you have any tips or advice to help me properly set up and optimize my workout plan?

​Thanks in advance!

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Sunday, November 1, 2026

Weight loss + cutting down on drinking

Does anyone else find it difficult to control their weight when they stop drinking alcohol regularly?

First off, a little context. I was overweight from when I was a toddler and got gradually fatter until I was about 20, when I started eating better and exercising and lost a huge amount of weight in a short time.

I've never been what I would call a problem drinker (never tempted to drink when I have stuff to do the next day) but I did used to get riggidy-wrecked when I went out, 2-3 times a month and be a hungover mess the next day.

I cut down on drinking 2 years ago (only go out once every few weeks) and since then it's been a battle to keep the weight off. I find this very strange because, doing the maths, I'm consuming less calories than before, while still hitting the gym and eating more home-cooked meals.

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Loose skin 16m

Hi so I’m 16 and I started my weight loss journey in I’d say ehhhh about October 2025maybe I lost alot of weight about 115lbs and I’m left with loose skin.
So I fall into the moderate category I have like a u shape of skin at the bottom of my torso and my whole body is kinda just stretchy.

My lowest weight was this augest at 150lbs I’ve been lean bulking since then trying to put on Muscle and it has been working to a certain degree I was fat from about 8-16 so a span of 8 years how meaningfully will my skin improve? If there’s anyone that was in a similar situation please let me know.

Cause it stops me from living my life and as sad as that sounds it’s true I have a very hard time with mental health from it and sadly my height is capped off since I’m Tanner stage 5 so I can’t grow any more in hopes to stretch tighter across my skin.

Any advice is appreciated.

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Saturday, October 31, 2026

21F, 165 cm, 65 kg — why is losing the last few kilos so frustrating when I’m already active and eating high protein?

I’m 21F, 165 cm (5’5”) and currently around 65 kg (143 lbs). My goal is around 60–62 kg, but more importantly I want to look leaner while keeping or growing my glutes.
I’ve been trying to lose weight for quite a while. I’ve previously gotten down to around 60 kg, but slowly gained some of it back.
Here’s my situation:
I aim for around 1,500 calories a day, although my actual intake varies.
I try to get 80–100 g of protein daily.
I often get 10–18k steps, use a walking pad, StairMaster or elliptical.
I also do glute exercises like Bulgarian split squats, hip abductions and cable kickbacks.
I’ve had periods where I wasn’t consistent with strength training but stayed active.
What confuses me is that my body sometimes looks noticeably different without much change on the scale. Recently, people have even commented that my glutes look bigger, despite me not training them consistently.
I feel like I’m constantly switching between wanting to lose weight quickly and wanting to build muscle, and I don’t know how to balance both.
For other petite women who successfully lost fat while maintaining their curves:
Did you focus on weight loss first or body recomposition?
How did you know whether you were actually in a calorie deficit?
Did increasing strength training make a bigger difference than cardio?
How did you stop obsessing over small weight fluctuations?
I’d really appreciate advice from women with similar starting measurements.

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Is anyone else embarrassed to talk about their weight loss?

Over the course of 2025 I lost about 50lbs by eating high protein, tracking macros, and working out. Gained a few lbs from my lowest weight since then as life happens, but I have consistently maintained a 19-20bmi since it was a whole lifestyle overhaul. I'm proud of the work I put in, and even more than the weight loss I am proud of myself for developing a healthy relationship with food and exercise. I like my body and I love taking care of it.

I didn't tell anyone what I was doing at any point, I just did it. It was awesome finding a new hobby in weightlifting and seeing the results of my work, but it just feels so uncomfortable to have other people notice. A few family members/friends have commented on it and I never know what to say. It honestly just makes me wish I was invisible.

Has anyone else dealt with this, where you're happy with your body and lifestyle, but just wish other people wouldn't notice anything changed?

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Friday, October 30, 2026

Thanks for this sub and its people

Male - 32 - Silly Goose

Long time lurker first time poster. I tried all sorts of techniques for weight loss over the years and Ive been quite heavy for the past 5 years. I finally got sick of falling off the wagon over and over and restarting my weight loss goals from scratch every 5 or 6 months.

I just wanted to post my appreciation I have read tonnes of your posts and comments and learnt so much. I have gone from 290 pounds to 240 pounds over the course of 2026 and my goal is to reach 195 pounds by next summer. I just wanted to share some stuff that helped me.

Really all i can say to others about what worked for me is a sustainable calorie deficit using an app to track your daily calories i use Nutracheck. I've been on 1900 calories a day for 4 months now. one day a week I eat a large breakfast of roughly 800 calories and then fast until the next day. I do this so I can bank 1100 calories a week to use elsewhere. This allows me to have some beers on the weekend or a whole ass pizza to myself.

For me I was unable to lose weight when following really strict diets of boring and bland food. Treating yourself once or twice a week can really improve your mental state and help you keep on track.

I also walk / jog ~10KM 3 times a week and I have a 20 minute dumbbell session twice a week for upper body strength. I know I could do more but for me this has shown great results and doesn’t cost me much time. I started at 10kg dumbbells in March until I became comfortable doing lots of reps and sets, slowly working on my technique. I recently moved onto 15KG dumbbells for bicep curls and overhead presses and 20KG for rows, shoulder shrugs and deadlifts. I never take my workouts into account on my calorie tracking apps because I don’t want an excuse to treat myself to more calories.

zero calorie drinks are great.

Use the tdee calculator to get an idea about what your calorie deficit should look like.

Don't jump straight into the deficit gradually reduce your daily calories by 100 weekly until you reach your deficit amount. This will give your stomach time to adjust to having less food.

frozen mango/pineapple is really filling and a nice low calorie snack option let it thaw for like 10 mins before munching you psychos.

BLT for me is the ultimate sandwich for weight loss. Smoked bacon medallions, low fat mayo, lettuce, tomato, salt, pepper and some low calorie bread. My BLT hits at around 300 calories and sometimes I go nuts and make two of them.

Every time I hit a milestone of 10 pounds I spend 2 - 3 days at my maintenance calories to give me a break and a bit of a motivational boost. This allows me to relax and enjoy 2500 calories a day which if you're counting every calorie you know how good this feels.

Anyway, thanks losers.

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Thursday, October 29, 2026

How to fight discouragement

Basically, I just feel so discouraged in my weight loss process. I'm down 100 pounds since the start of the year but the more I lose, the worse I look at myself. I started at 420 pounds at 6'3". I currently hit 320 pounds and all I feel is the need to lose another 100. When I started the journey, I felt good about myself and proud of myself for every pound I dropped. Now I weigh myself daily, sometimes multiple times a day, even though I know there's no point, just to have a number to look at myself and hate myself for. I look at myself shirtless just to hate how I look. I don't want to go out or do anything because I hate how I look and feel like I don't deserve anything. And when I do slip up (for example, only doing 32 minutes of cardio instead of 40), I hate myself even more and punish myself by giving myself another 40 minutes of cardio anyway and restricting my calories even more. Im not even sure how sustainable this is. Im miserable. I purposely spend more time in bed so I don't have to think about myself existing and how I look. And it didn't used to be like this. I used to enjoy exercising and be proud of myself for being in a deficit at all having no specific goal for weight loss other than to feel better and having no deadline. Now I'm giving myself a year to lose another 100 pounds and spending every day hating myself. I know part of it has to do with my move. Im a POC and I went from a rather diverse area with lots of different skin tones and body types to a college area with mostly young skinny white people and I know feeling like I don't fit in makes me want to stay inside more. Still, there has to be a better way to approach weight loss than hating myself the whole time and being so miserable that I don't want to talk to or meet new people because I'm so ashamed of myself.

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Finally quit the HAES dietitian

I am 60 years old and honestly
Was not that familiar with HAES. Thought it was a gentle kind way for weight loss.

When I started - I was maybe few pounds overweight and because of my age, time to try some body acceptance. And enjoyed eating out and baking and just kept adding on more food!

Then whoa- gained 10 lbs in 2 months - which is a lot for me as I am 4 ft 11 inches! Talked to the RD and wanted me to check my HRT side effects , she was appalled when I asked about fat loss, and was concerned that I had had 2 diets my entire life.

My doctor who is not overly weight or looks conscious said GLP1s may be an option if I can lose weight via diet and exercise. And yet this RD minimized any concern for my weight gain!

I want to quit my job and will need private insurance and trying to keep my health markers under control if I can't afford ACA insurance . So trying a weight loss dietitian next !

I think HAES in general is compassionate but I just don't understand the denial of the impacts of health and obesity!

Felt better when I joined this sub and saw a handful of posts critical of this extreme HAES approach.

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Wednesday, October 28, 2026

Thyroid beefing

Okay it’s not even me that’s beefing with my thyroid, it’s my new PCP. Historically, I’ve been in the overweight range, as a teenager my BMI was in the 27-29 range, as an adult it stayed at that upper limit until I did the thing and lost weight- the lowest I got was a BMI of 21.8. But the options to get there or maintain a <25 BMI weren’t ideal- I exercised to the point of injury with an intake around 1800 calories, while recovering from that injury I gained some of the weight back. When I was cleared for activity and wanted to lose the weight, I went back to my 1800 while running and weight training, then I got injured again, but that time it was a bit more severe and put me out a lot longer.

Temporarily, I can’t do heavy weight training 4x/week like I used to because I have two years where I need to focus my time elsewhere. Instead of exercising a lot, I’m eating less, which kind of sucks because I’m short and maintaining BMI of 24.2 has me below the intake that I need to get all of my daily nutrition from food. It’s to the point where my PCP is adamant that she’d rather I sit 10-15 lbs overweight than keep me in a normal BMI range. IM ON BOARD WITH THAT, but I’m pissed that I’m going to be uncomfortable again. She’s right about my recent intake, I’m miserable and I have no energy and this fucking sucks, I have an appointment with an RDN to find the best way to increase back to a normal baseline.

That being said, PCP wants to test my thyroid, I’m going to get blood work asap, but idk. I have minimal family history of endocrine/metabolic issues. The women in my family are just bigger? I know that some of it is dietary choices, but even my relatives that work out on a very regular basis and eat to truly fuel their body are bigger, in that BMI 26-28 range that I always end up going back to. They’ve had the blood work, they don’t meet criteria for pharmacologically assisted weight loss, all our waist to hip ratios are ideal even if someone is pushing the threshold of obesity. So I don’t want to “get my hopes up” that my thyroid is being a shithead just for the labs to be completely normal, yknow?

any input from the “maybe it’s your thyroid!” People is welcome. Even if it wasn’t your thyroid. Bc it’s probably not mine.

Don’t tell me to put on muscle bc i got to the funky scan things and i am a muscly beefcake thank you 😌

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Looking for workout advice to help my girlfriend

My girlfriend (27) is roughly 240-60 lbs and has a ton of dietary restrictions because of IBS-D. Because of this, typical dieting is unsustainable and even harmful to her health. She is looking to start a home workout routine to start building muscle and eliminating fat, get stronger, etc.

I would LOVE to hear from girlies who have found some workouts to do at home that helped them on their weight loss journey. Light weights and bodyweight exercises would be best, as well as ones that are low impact on knees and shins, and doesn't result in any unnecessary blood flow to the head (think downward dog in yoga).

~some notes for extra context, for the curious:

- 7+ years ago my gf had her gallbladder removed and lost a ton of weight, but since I met her she's been gradually gaining about 10 lbs a year

- Due to our life circumstances, she's been in and out of part time jobs for years and won't be looking for full-time work until next summer, but she doesn't live a purely sedentary lifestyle.

- During that time, the weight gain caused "pseudo-tumor" (a mix of crazy cluster headaches, migraines, muscle spasms, and eye pain all from an excess of spinal fluid around the brain). Those symptoms are MUCH better now and nearly gone, but overexertion will cause migraines

- I don't mind the weight gain and we are both still very much in love and intimate, but I know that she wants to see some improvement and have better control over her weight

- my points of reference are myself, (27m, 190-200 lbs, and average level of fitness). I know plenty of workouts but don't know which workouts will prove most beneficial and accessible to my girlfriend

Many thanks y'all :)

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Is weight loss possible in a sedentary life style?

A few weeks ago I was averaging 7000 steps a day and was doing a few minutes of jump rope and some work outs I find on YouTube but then I started to focus a bit more on studying and now I hardly hit 2000 steps a day, I want to lose weight and I know the answer is a calorie deficit but I don't know how much the deficit should be if I'm sedentary, I honestly can watch 800 calories a day if it ment I'll lose weight but I know that isn't healthy at all, is it possible to ever lose weight in this life style or am I just doomed to wait until school ends to go back to working out?

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Tuesday, October 27, 2026

34F trying to lose 35lbs, worried about skin laxity, looking for honest experiences

Hi everyone, I’m looking for honest experiences from women who have lost around 30–40 lbs, especially in their 30s.

I’m 34F, 5’4, currently around 154 lbs. I gained about 35 lbs to get my cycle back after years of under-eating and over-exercising. I’m grateful my cycle are consistent for the past year, but my confidence has honestly been at an all-time low and I really struggle with how I look right now.

I used to be around 124 lbs and my goal is to get back to around 120–130 lbs. I’m extremely worried about skin laxity after losing the weight, especially in my breasts, stomach, arms, thighs, and face/chin area. I’m not talking about major loose skin, but more looking softer, less firm, and crepey.

I’ve been lifting consistently since July 4x week, eating at least 130g protein daily, taking a collagen supplement, staying hydrated, and trying to lose slowly while preserving muscle.

I would really love to hear from women with similar stats who have gone through a 30–40 lb weight loss. How did your skin actually turn out? Was it better or worse than you expected? Did it improve after maintaining your weight for a while?

I know genetics play a huge role, but I’ve been worrying about this constantly and would really appreciate realistic experiences. Thank you 💙

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cheat days

okay guys i know this might sound stupid. i know cheat days where you eat a surplus, might erase your entire deficit for the week if you’re not careful. and i’ve heard the “cheat meal” argument as well compared to cheat days. if your cheat day, while on an extreme cut is just your maintenance calories, will that erase your progress for the week and lead to weight gain instead of loss over time? if one day a week i am setting aside as a maintenance day, will that slow weight loss drastically? or make your deficit for the week leading up kind of unnecessary?

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Mindset on Long Weight-Loss Journeys

Hello Y'all,

I am just shy of 1 year since hitting my weight loss journey head-on, and have worked my way down from 594lb to 369lb (-225). This is ~0.93% of my starting weight per week, accounting for the scale going down over time. I couldn't be more happy for the progress, but I've hit my first prolonged slump where motivation just hasn't been there and my diet hasn't been up to my standard over the last ~10 days. I'm back into the swing of things, but am looking for advice on ways others have looked at long weight-loss journeys. It feels like I have swam up from Marianas Trench and found myself at the foot of Everest.. I've shown myself that I can David-Goggins this and show self-discipline, but I'm a year in and still have a long road ahead. The scale doesn't move as fast as it once did, and milestones are less frequent.

How do I put my recent successes in the rear mirror and focus on the next week, next month, next year?

Edit: To give context, I am 23m/6'4 with a very rough goal of 240lb

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What are your thoughts on Orangetheory Fitness?

I’m 31F 245lbs wanting to build strength. I’ve lost 35lbs through calorie deficit, and although that’s working for me, I can tell I’m losing muscle too. I really want to get into strength training, but the decision fatigue is REAL. The idea of going somewhere and receiving a structured workout is super appealing to me. Orangetheory is not as expensive as personal training in my area, but it’s more hands-on than navigating a gym myself.

That said, I find the idea of my heart rate being known by others during my workout sort of invasive, especially being heavier than others. But I know that’s the point… has anyone tried it before, especially around the beginning of your weight loss journey? What was your experience like?

Thank you!!

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Monday, October 26, 2026

Different calorie allowance on different apps?

I’ve been following a calorie deficit since March and have lost around 40lbs so far. I also work out 6 days a week, and aim to get around 7-10k steps daily. I use Lose It to track my food, and my daily calorie budget has gone down (as expected) with my weight loss. However, I’m now hungry 24/7. I started around 1800 calories/day and now I’m at 1550/day per Lose It. I’ve found that 1650-1700/day seems to make me feel satisfied and not like I could eat my entire pantry. I always load my meals with protein and fiber, but that hasn’t seemed to make a difference in my hunger lately. I use Ladder for my workouts and noticed on their nutrition part of the app, with the same specifications inputed on Lose It, my calorie budget is 2150/day. Curiously, I checked out my fitness pal and my budget would be 1850. I guess the only way to find out would be to try eating a higher amount for a week (I.e 1700-1800/day) and seeing what happens. However, I don’t want to delay progress if it’s going to cause any. Does anyone have an experience with this or use multiple apps to track?

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Am I doing it wrong?

I have hit a weight plateau before even properly starting. I track my calories to T, sizes are not going down , and I am generally healthy. I am very obese so I expected a rabid weight loss as my fast serious diet. My Cals are 1300 to 1400 which is suitable for a short girl.

Can't think of any reason why my weight isn't dropping. I have been dieting for a month now almost

Weight is 224.2 lbs

Height is 5'2

Goal weight is 132 lbs

I use a food scale for all my food and I add everything to my fitnesspal except for water of course.

I eat around 1300 to 1400 calories on normal days

If I walk or do light exercise I up it to 1500 or 1600 calories

I have never stuck to a diet before beyond 2 weeks

This is my first serious attempt and I try to make it practical so it fits with my busy college life

I am aware of how much calories oil contains or how much high in calories sugary stuff are so I avoid them.

My digestion is working well and I am not constipated.

If there is something I missed try to tell , I am genuinely trying not to give up again.

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Sunday, October 25, 2026

winter hunger! ❄️ help!

hi everyone! I'm 26, 5'4", and 212lbs (down 20!) w/ an estimated TDEE of 2,600.

I started my weight loss journey in July, and despite a brief week-long freakout at the start, I've been super consistent with my calorie deficit. I happened to go up on a routine medication at the same time which slashed my appetite by two-thirds. At one point, when I was exercising less, it could be a struggle for me to break even 1,200cals. (These days, I'm much more physically active & average around 1,900.) Needless to say, I've been lucky to face relatively zero food noise, making staying on track easy.

I have a big abdominal surgery at the end of January, and I want to be 200lbs by then - both to reduce the strain on my overall body / weight on my core AND to prepare for being basically sedentary during my recovery.

Now that there's a chill in the air, however...I'm hungry!! I'm already getting that winter craving for carbs, fats, and sweet treats. I'm sleepier and hungrier. My mind longs for them. And all of a sudden my cals on the calorie tracker say "over"...

Experienced weight-loss journeyers -- what can I do? Are there strategies you've found especially helpful? What helped last winter?

I might be willing to try a gentler deficit, but I really want to
hit my goal before surgery knocks me out.

All advice appreciated!!

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How's your relationship with food going?

So I've been in a deficit since beginning of August and so far I've lost around 22lb, my starting weight was 178lbs the goal is to get to 140.

I'm pretty satisfied with the weight loss and I'd say I did it in a healthy way, I've kept track of my proteins, and I'd have a sweet from time to time so I wouldn't binge eat

What I've noticed now however, is that whenever I'm craving something like a brownie for example and I do take it, I don't really enjoy it anymore. Is it because I cut out all the junk food and sweets that I don't care for it anymore or should I actually be worried about a possible disorder

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[TW: mention of ED] this weight loss journey worsened my eating disorder so much, I don't know what to do

Hey everyone. This is pretty much a vent about how my eating disorder intensified while losing weight and AFTER losing a lot of the weight.

My stats 18F 164cm, highest weight 105kg, starting weight (when started doing calorie deficit) 100kg, and lowest weight recorded was 70.5kg, and last time I checked it went up to 71kg on 14/10, but I binged several times during those 11 days so probably gained a bit more.

If you check out my profile you could some of my posts on this sub from several months ago, and you could tell that I was/am someone who is dealing with an ED. And when people pointed it out in the comments I genuinely thought they were gaslighting me and I did not believe them.

Before going on a weight loss journey I dealt with occasional binge eating episodes and mostly overeating (duh, that's how I became obese), but then after I started, I don't how but I became extremely restrictive with my calorie intake. Sometimes I would genuinely be fuming if I went over 1200 calories. I would be mad if I skipped a day without exercising.

And then one day, after months of not binging, I did. And right after doing so I went to purge. I think that was my first time ever doing self-induced vomitting due to a binge and I'm pretty sure I posted about it here too. Obviously, I felt disgusting and guilty.

I decided to take a break from being too strict with my calorie counting, and instead of consuming 1000-1300 calories I decided to consume 1500-1700 calories per day, and even so I was guesstimating them in my head. Surprisingly enough, I still managed to lose some kgs through that. It was perfect.

And then July came. 7/7 was one of the worst binge days I have ever had in my life. Even when I was obese my binge eating episodes were never this bad. And since then, my binge episodes have been becoming more frequent, to the point where it is now almost weekly.

Today I binged and purged again. I was clean for 5 days and I thought I was doing soo good and I had promised myself that from now on I will be healthy and never binge, purge or undereat ever again. I dont even know why I am binging, I have been eating 2-3 full relatively balanced meals with lots of snacks.

I want to be healthy so bad. I also want to lose weight so bad. I dont know what to do, it sucks so much. Today I started my day with a healthy filling breakfast but yet I was soooo damn hungry. My period is supposed to start today but it has not. I am scared I will never heal.

Someone told me that the reason why I am dealing with binge eating again is because of my restrictive ED that I had till a few months ago. I hate what I have done to myself and I hate what I am still doing to myself. But I cannot stop eating.

I am sorry for bitching and crying here, but I have no one to talk to about this. I hope you guys understand

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