Friday, May 2, 2025

Feeling discouraged

Hi everyone! I am 5’0 and I started my weight loss journey at 250 pounds. I currently weigh 160. I’m feeling a little discouraged because when I was at my heaviest I was just happy to be at 150 but now that I’m getting closer I am seeing that I should weight 100-120 pounds. Anyone else feel this way ? I feel like I have come so far and now seeing this it feels impossible and unattainable. Before I gained all my weight my smallest was about 130. I guess I just wanted to know if anyone else felt this way on their journey. I am getting married in 5 months and my goal was to be 140 by then. I know I should be happy at the progress that I have made but it’s hard when you see what bmi says you should be

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arguing with my family about deficit ???

SW:202 CW:181 GW: 150

i shared with them about my experience, using diet or “light” options. i eat a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, lean proteins. theres just a couple things i’ve swapped here and there to make it easier.

my mom is convinced i’m tanking my health because she’s one of those full fat, real sugar people that think the fake stuff does more harm than good. i said i’m overweight, that’s the real danger, my main focus is calorie intake. for example she doesn’t like the fact i use sour cream “light”. i explained the difference between light and regular is like almost a hundred calories, which are calories that could be spent on more substantial meals elsewhere.

then my brother says, “i actually don’t think it’s all about calories, just because you’re eating less calories doesn’t necessarily mean weight loss” ……. at this point i just changed the subject because i realized there was no point arguing with someone who cites sources starting with “i think”. so triggering when you work so hard and are excited about your results and people keep shitting on my parade! lol

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Thursday, May 1, 2025

One insecurity for another

I’m going to be very transparent about something. I’ve lost 70 pounds. That’s a lot of weight. It’s a number people hear and immediately want to high-five me for, like I’ve achieved something monumental, which, technically, I have. I worked hard for it. I stayed committed, made real changes, and earned it. I want more than anything to take these compliments and praise for what they are But here’s what people don’t see: I’m exhausted. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. Worn down by a reality no one warned me about. I thought the hardest part would be the weight loss itself. But I was completely unprepared for the aftermath. I expected some loose skin.What I didn’t expect was to feel like I’d traded in one body I struggled with for a new one that’s just as hard to live in. My arms have extra skin that moves in ways I’m not used to. My thighs feel soft and unstable. My stomach looks like someone let the air out too fast. I’m losing fullness in my chest, and the skin there is loose and thin. And my double chin didn’t vanish, it turned into this sagging neck skin with deep creases That is probably the most offensive of them all . None of these changes mean I’ve failed. But my brain doesn’t care about that. The body dysmorphia is loud. Louder than the compliments. Louder than the facts. Louder than the pride I know I should feel. People talk about the mental benefits of weight loss like they’re guaranteed. They’re not. I want to feel proud. I should feel proud. But instead, I feel like I’ve just swapped one set of insecurities for another. More shame. More overthinking. More second-guessing every single bite I eat. Food has become a mind game. I know this is a lifestyle change. I believe in balance. But the guilt still creeps in. Not because I don’t understand what I’m doing—but because I do. And it still feels like too much. I’ve cried over dinner. I’ve panicked trying to decide what to eat. I feel trapped by the same three restaurants I’ve convinced myself are “safe,” and the thought of another salad with grilled vegetables makes me want to scream. This isn’t about being dramatic. This is about being tired. Tired of guilt. Tired of pressure. Tired of thinking this was supposed to feel better by now. And the scariest part? The fear that maybe I’m just not built to feel content. That no matter how far I come, I’ll always find something to pick apart. That I’ll keep chasing something that never quite feels like enough. I thought being healthier would mean being happier. But I’m not there yet. My clothes don’t fit. My snacks, my routines, my tears of frustration.All of it is a reminder that I’m still not settled in this version of me. I know I’ve accomplished something important. I’m not ignoring that. But what no one told me is that healing your body and healing your mind don’t always happen at the same time. I am healthier. That’s true. But I’m still waiting to feel happier.

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Common mistakes and what to do instead

I see posts here about people starving themselves, doing extreme exercises, starting strange diets, and then giving up as they see no progress. I am someone who finds it easy to stay in shape and and I would like to share what I follow, hoping that those who struggle can benefit from it.

If you starve yourself, restrict food for many hours, your body will make you crave food that gives you a very quick boost (high calories). You will be much more likely to crave something sweet, junk food with a lot of carbs, and it will be very hard to resist. Cheat days like that will set you back. You might end up with deficiencies because you flip flop between eating junk food or sweet things and empty calories and it's nothing but torture.

Instead: eat frequently, small, simple, and healthy meals, have snacks, chew food many times and eat slowly so your body will let you know when it's soon enough - if you are too quick, you will miss this body signal. Eat until 70-80% full and feel more energetic. The snacks and meals you eat should be as low processed as possible. Many people mistake the feeling of thirst with a feeling of hunger, so do not forget to hydrate. My snacks are apples, carrots and sometimes a dip.

Exercises are good to do but they only work if you can stay consistent. It's difficult to figure out nutrition in general when someone is doing intense sports and together with a weight loss journey it's even more so. In a calorie deficit, your body will scream at you to stop exercising because you have no energy from your caloric intake to do that. What happens after an exercise when you are depleted and exhausted is you will be laying on your bed, sitting in the armchair watching tv, finding it hard to focus and think, barely moving your body the rest of the day, as your body is trying to preserve some energy and recover from the shock. It's again, torturing yourself. So many people quit.

Instead: light exercises, frequently, such as riding a bike or just walking. It's much more likely that you can stay consistent and it's easier to fit in your agenda. Intense exercises are good to plan once light exercises are easy to do and you feel ready for the challenge. As you become healthier, the intense exercises won't be as painful either anymore.

The choice of food matters, the best is to learn to cook from scratch. Processed food is your enemy because you do not control what they put in it and you should look at it with suspicion. The simpler a dish it's most often the better. Replace snacks with carrots or celery, apples, use a small amount of hummus or peanut butter as a dip. If you want to buy hummus from the store, even for something like that, check the ingredient list, check the calories. If you really want something sweet, it's best if you buy something plain and sweeten it yourself at home so you can set the sweetness level. An example is that eating plain yogurt is healthy, adding fruits, nuts and seeds, a small amount of (real and unadulterated) honey, cinnamon, is a nice treat as well. I personally do not drink sweet drinks and do not use sugar at home at all. I am never hungry, and I rarely crave sweet food.

Trial and error: Test and see what works, do more of that, and what does not, then troubleshoot, observe why it did not work out. Maybe you just find it boring to walk, but it's easier with company, so you can try to join a friend who walks their dog. Maybe you hate walking aimlessly, then you can listen to music or a podcast and choose to walk when your destination is 30 minutes away from you. Find what is the easiest for you to do. Stick to it.

Difficult days: If hard boiled eggs are annoying to make and peel, but you can buy them at the store, or pre-cut vegetables, then buy those and do not care if you spent more on them on that day. Always have something quick to grab at home so you are never starving.

The goal for a weight loss journey should be to find something that is easy to fit in your agenda and lifestyle, therefore it is very personal. The reason you want to do that because consistency is the most difficult thing and you want to stay consistent. If it's difficult, you will most likely to eventually quit because your body and mind will scream at you.

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When did you actually start liking what was in the mirror?

I (F24 5’4.5”) began my weigh loss efforts at 240lbs. I have been calorie counting and walking a lot more than I did previously. Every time I stepped on the scale, little by little, pounds were coming off. About 9 months later and I’m sitting at 184! Yay! I’m just about 55lbs down. I could be more happy that I feel much healthier. I’m able to move around and I feel like over all I’m lighter. But I’m looking in the mirror and still not happy with what I’m looking at. Naturally most of my fat has deposited into my arms and as everything is shrinking my arms are pretty much still meaty. It’s very disproportional. I’m sure my arms have gotten a bit smaller but at a much slower pace than the rest of my body. I know I’m still technically obese so I’m not truly freaking out or anything YET. I have moments where I see the figure that is being shaped through this weight loss and I’m not gonna lie, I get sad. I really did think once I hit this weight (180ish) I would be feeling really confident. But instead I feel like I’m even more insecure because I’m trying so hard for what I’m seeing. I’m definitely not dumb, I understand that this weight is undoubtedly better than what I was at but just a little bummed I’m not looking like what I was expecting.

Dont get me wrong. I love my body! It is my vessel, truly and incredible thing. But right now I’m struggling to not compare my body with endless media representation on how a woman’s body is suppose to look like. I’m feeling a bit big and buff despite not having any muscle hahaha.

Anyone who has gone through a weight loss journey, when did you start feeling more confident and happy about your body?

Anyone with similar body proportions as me, when did you start seeing a slimming in your arms?

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Wednesday, April 30, 2025

My thoughts after losing over 80 lb

I decided to get back into playing instruments, which included the drums. My search for a good drum throne put me down a rabbit hole where I found out that these chairs have weight capacities, with some being 250, some being 270. I was around 276 lb at my heaviest. As a woman who is 5'10", that put me well into obese range. I was disgusted with myself, and I decided that if I was so fat that I might break furniture, then it was time for a change.

My diet before was really atrocious. I would drink multiple cans of soda per day. We have a deep fryer at home, so I'd eat tons of fried food also. I loved fast food, and would order two entrees most of the time. I never drank water and I never worked out, not even walking. I have cycled in the past, but since getting sick with a lung infection, I let myself go.

The first thing I did was cut out drinking sodas. I dropped a lot of water weight really quickly. I cut my calories to around 1200. No longer did I eat fast food, sweets, or sugary things. A lot of meals consisted of a chicken breast, veggies, and a small portion of potatoes. I avoided heavy sauces, and stuck to light gravy or hot sauce.

I found that as I lost weight, I became more confident. I noticed my weight loss first in my face. I didn't have such a large chin. Clothes that I used to wear quickly looked ridiculous on me since they didn't fit me too well anymore. It took me around half a year for me to get where I am now.

Recently, I went to a clothing store at the mall. I did not set foot in the plus size section — I didn't have to! The things I tried on fit, and comfortably so. I'm able to hike, take my dog on a walk, cycle, and fit in small seats that bigger people would have trouble fitting into.

TL;DR: I changed my entire life for the better and it has given me a lot of confidence.

So after it all, I'm down over 80 lb (32kg). What I did was:

  • I stopped eating candy, cookies, cake, and anything else with lots of added sugar.
  • For dinner, I usually had lean, low calorie chicken that offered lots of protein to satisfy me.
  • No cheat days. I don't believe in them, and I don't need them. I treated this as a lifestyle change, not a diet.
  • I learned to hate fast food and super processed food from the grocery store. These companies want to poison us and get us addicted to their product. Home cooked meals are better.
  • I do eat out, but I do it smartly. Thai food, sushi, and other food that isn't deep fried works for me.
  • One meal a day (OMAD) and intermittent fasting really helps me keep to my calories.
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12 week update 💪

Mini success story!

I decided January 2025 that i was ready to focus on myself, when my toddler turned two and i can focus a bit more on myself. Suffered from some bad PPA/PPD and was prescribed lexapro a year and a half ago, which caused some weight gain. Now, after 12 weeks of CICO tracking and light workouts, I'm halfway to my goal!

40f, 5'4", SW 180, CW 164, GW 150

I use lose it! to log meals and track macros, and a fitbit to track calories out/exercise. Im a spreadsheet nerd and have been plugging in as much info as i can to chart my progress. Ive been averaging 1422 calories in and 2772 calories out over the last 12 weeks, with a deficit goal to be around -1250 per day. I'm averaging 13,000 steps per day, with running, walking, dumbells, bodyweight workouts, 12-3-30 treadmill, and yoga for exercise. its not consistent but I fit in what i can with my busy schedule.

My diet is boring.
Breakfast: black coffee, protein shake
Lunch: salad w/ dinner protein leftovers, no dressing
Snacks: nonfat greek yogurt w/ granola, apples, oranges, nuts
Dinner: salad/green vegetable, protein (chicken, steak, pork), rice, quinoa or sweet potato

I try to get >100g of protein per day but rarely getting above 80, and though I've managed to get my fat grams under control I'm noticing my carbs grams are constantly high, though from looking at my meal logs those carbs are mostly from fruits. I haven't given up wine or vodka, and I don't want to. I eat very little processed foods and eat out about once every few months.

The first month I lost 5 lbs, the second I lost 7, and this final month I lost 4. What can i do to ramp up weight loss these next 3 months? Lower my calories in? ramp up calories out? bit of both?

This has been a remarkable few months once I finally put my mind to it!

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