I’m down ~80lbs… and I’m stuck

Hi everyone. I’m in need of some encouragement. From Feb 2020-April 2021, I went from approx. 230 lbs to 150 lbs, but I’ve been stuck there ever since (+/- 5-7 lbs).

My original motivation for weight loss was to lower my BMI in order to qualify for breast reduction through my insurance. I did it, and last November, I got my reduction. Couldn’t have been more thrilled!

The problem is, as soon as I hit the target BMI threshold, I stopped losing. I can’t seem to push myself any further, even though I still “feel” like I’m dieting.

Even though I am much more comfortable and confident now (in my appearance, which has no small part to do with how I perceive I am treated by others), I’m not happy. I literally had a dream the other night where someone told me that if I lost another 20 lbs, I’d look great – and it’s true, of course.

I’ve recently started taking Orangetheory classes, but the problem is with the kitchen. It’s getting harder and harder for me to feel satisfied enough to have the self control to stop eating large portions and snacking.

If anyone has been in a similar position and has any words of advice or encouragement or a story of how you overcame it, I’d really appreciate it.

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For people new on this sub and in the beginning of their CICO journey, PLEASE understand there is a lot more to CICO than you think there is.

This subreddit is a huge proponent of CICO, and for a good reason. CICO is scientifically accurate, it paints a very easy picture when it comes to understanding weight loss. and it is generally the first step to get started.

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However there is a lot more when it comes to CICO, particularly the CO part of CICO. When I first started my weight loss journey 4 years ago, I thought CICO was just Cal In Cal Out. I thought the CO part (other then exercise) was the standard number of calories my body would exhume REGARDLESS of what my CI was. For 4 years it went like this, I would restrict calories for 1-2 weeks, lose around 70000 calories and be happy. Then it would happen, the inevitable of an eating disorder. I would feel extreme hunger, extreme cravings, terrible desperation and I would binge and eat 7000 - 10000 calories in one or two days.

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Once my binge was completed, the dread would set in. I lose 7000 calories in 2 weeks, and ate 10,000 in 2 days. Meaning I lose no weight, I negated everything. All my efforts for the past 2 weeks were worthless. Money on expensive protein and fibre to fill me up all gone down the drain. This feeling was terrible it would spiral me into sadness. I stopped counting calories, stopped weighing myself, went back to my overeating until a few months had passed and I was ready to start again. I told myself this time was different, this time I would not binge. But I binged, again. This cycle continued for 4 years.

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This year, I was ready to start again. Except I heard a quote that struck me, "Doing the same over and over again and expecting something to change is the definition of insanity." I decided this time, WHEN I binge, I will continue recording my weight and calories to see what happened. Naturally, for as long as I could I put off my binge. Infact at 2 weeks binge free I genuinely thought maybe I was stronger now and I could actually put the binge off.

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I am an obese person with an eating disorder. So I binged. 7000 calories in 2 days. Initially, the same dread of failing filled me up. I binged more, and more and felt worse and worse. I lost track at some point but all my binges combined were somewhere around 15,000 cals. Around 4 pounds, to recap I had lose 2 pounds the week before. When I finally checked myself on the scale, the numbers didn't lie. I had gained 4 pounds. Usually at this point in my life, I quit restricting, quit counting, quit weighing, all because the knowledge of negating what I did made me feel like a failure. This time however, I told myself I would counting calories post binge. For upto 4 days, I ate my baseline tdee around 2000k. On the 5th day, I went back to 1200-1500 cal restricting. The next morning, I did a giant dump. And I mean GIANT dump. I lost 1.5 pounds in the dump alone. For the next 2 days, I did my normal restricting at 1500 cals. I lose 2.5 pounds within those 2 days. 4 pounds in total.

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The feeling of dread I had was gone, I felt so happy. The realization that my efforts the week before did not get negated, was the only thing I needed to not give up. For the first time in my life I did not give up.

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My point of this post is, when people are new to this sub and to weight loss, they instantly get tunnel vision of my CICO. This results in entering the terrible cycle I entered for 4 years. Folks, it is NOT all math. I mean yes, the very underlying physiology is all math, please do not come at me for that. But the CO part of CICO is SOOOO much more complicated then you think it is. Your body will hurt you by trying to hang on to as many calories as it can, but once it knows that you, it's hooman soul, is safe and not devoid of food, it will "Calorie Out" those extra calories as soon as it can. I'm not a nutritionist so I can't go much into it, but I will link a very good video that helped me understand. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RDhM-ATlsJA. This video basically explains that CO part of CICO being so much more complicated than many things it is.

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tl;dr you did NOT negate anything you did when you binged/overate. Go back on your restricting the next day, and it will fix itself in your poops and your energy expenditure. You did not fail. Let your body decide the math, not your brain.

DISCLAIMER: I know for a lot this is common knowledge, but for new obese people with ED, who get tunneled vision about CICO, who constantly fail at CICO and cannot lose weight, this is for YOU friend.

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My mom body shames me

Not sure if this is the right subreddit for this but it relates to weight, fitness, and body positivity issues.

I (32F) am currently at my heaviest weight (240 lb). No excuses, I just haven’t been prioritizing my health and it caught up to me. I am confident that I can lose the excess weight as I have done it before. But to be honest, at this particular time, I am more concerned with focusing on my mental health (I have been struggling with depression and ptsd and some days struggle even get out of bed) than the weight loss.

That is all background info: the issue is that my mom, who is extremely fit, tends to body shame me. She bullies me into doing physical activities (hiking, biking, etc) with her and then gets irritated with me when I can’t keep up with her. Even besides the difference in fitness, she’s about a foot taller than me so even at my fittest, I could never keep up with her. The last time I went hiking with her, she literally abandoned me on the side of a mountain and just took off. Afterwards, she is always self righteous about it—‘if I don’t like being left behind I should be fitter and so I don’t have a right to be upset about it.’

To be clear, when I am on my own or with other people who go my speed, I genuinely like hiking/biking/etc. I just don’t enjoy the side of humiliation.

Now, we are planning an upcoming trip to visit with my sister. I requested that instead of the suggested bike ride, we go to a museum or stroll around a botanical garden etc—I offered several such activities and my sister and I were able to come up with a variety of fun things that we could all do. My mom was pissed that I nixed the bike ride plan. She tried to guilt me into going saying that my sister and brother in law really wanted to go and would be disappointed (I don’t think they were). She accused me of thinking the world revolves around me. I explained that it’s frustrating for both of us when we go at different speeds so let’s just do something else. Then she started with the “just because you aren’t fit enough to do—“ and I hung up on her.

I am not really looking for advice tbh, especially not of the “throw the whole mother out” variety. I just wanted a place to vent hopefully to some sympathetic ears.

TLDR—my fit mom shames me when I can’t keep up and shames me when I try to avoid the situation

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I need help. My ADHD is impossible

I can’t even count how many times I’ve been on the weight loss train at this point. I have severe ADHD for which I am medicated for with Aderall XR. My nonexistent executive function makes it difficult to meal plan and prep. Now my meds help during the day and I am able to control myself and eat in a calorie deficit but when I get home and my meds wear off it usually turns into a full on binge usually on sugary snacks. Food gives me that dopamine hit and all in all calms me after the stress of the day. And the cycle continues. I’m so over this it’s been years of this cycle and then looking in mirror and hating myself. I don’t know what to do. I still live at home so simply not buying “binge/junk” food is not an option as I’m not the one buying it.

If anyone on here has ADHD and has had successful weight loss please share your tips.

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NSV I realized today that I can’t consume sugar like I used to

This is incredibly minor but I’m 3 1/2 months into my weight loss journey (using Intermittent Fasting) where I have rarely consumed added sugar this entire time. Today as a birthday celebration I had a slice of birthday cake from a highly rated bakery. I hated it. The frosting seemed like straight sugar and the cake itself all was just too sweet so instead I munched on some jerky. It’s being enjoyed but not by me.

Odd NSV but one I didn’t expect to experience and am delightfully surprised about.

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Was recommended to eat 1,200 by my doctor, but I just binged/overate yesterday and I'm trying to understand why.

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Community, I hope you are all doing well and prospering.

I have been a silent reader on this sub for some time, and any time I had a question or was struggling was something, the search bar has helped me tremulously. Thank you all because I have learned so much in the past few months simply by reading about your individual journey's.

I just created an account because, after two months of dieting and exercise, I have hit a hurdle and wanted to see if anyone had any comments/feedback.

Background:

I am 37 F and (edit: to include height, 5 ft 5) 40lbs overweight. I have lost a good amount of weight so far by eating my doctor's recommended 1,200kcal a day. I have incorporated exercise 5 days a week. A mix of cardio and light strength workouts.

I have a sweet tooth and previously due to not understanding how to diet properly I had a binge eating disorder, but that was resolved in a matter of months after I learned that eating one light meal a day was the cause of that.

This time around, I felt informed and happy to take things steady. The 1,200 can feel a little restrictive sometimes due to my diet not being high protein, but for the most part, weight has been coming off and I've felt fine. I gave myself one day a week where I can order a junk meal and incorporate sweets into my daily diet so I could ensure I wasn't feeling deprived or miserable.

I thought I finally figured this whole weight loss thing out and was on my way.

Problem:

Yesterday happened. The day before yesterday I had my weekly junk meal but ordered milkshake this time round, which put me at around 2,500kcal. It was not maintenance, but I felt okay because that's life and I preferred doing that than restricting and later possibly bingeing,

However, yesterday reminded me of my old bingeing days. I have no idea what was causing extreme hunger but one slice of cake wasn't enough, one sweet wasn't enough, I felt a craving that wasnt normal. I almost eat up to 3,000 calories. Combine that with the day before, I couldn't help but feel, I have messed up my diet.

Today: I am back on track today. I am determined to keep going and have already got back up and continued my day and getting ready to do my exercise right now. This is huge for me. The old me would have felt so defeated.

However, I am very concerned that this might happen again. I want to try to figure out what caused this so I can minimize this going further. Does anyone know what caused this? Yesterday felt like the diet was restricting and suppressing my appetite, and my body just gave up. I still have weight to lose. I want to get to my goal in a healthy way both physically and emotionally. Things have been going so well on the 1,200 diet but I am questioning if this is a little too restrictive. It's felt a little restrictive, but nothing close to starvation or extreme diet.

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Concerned about calorie intake

I'm still pretty new on my fitness/weight loss journey. I am a 6'2'' 300 pound man. I've been overweight since childhood. To varying degrees but always at least chubby. From what I've read online and plugged into various calculators and websites I seem to be somewhere in the realm of 100 pounds overweight. I have a fitbit and I'm tracking calories with My fitness pal. Everything is telling me I am burning huge amounts of calories a day. Like 3,000-4,000 calories a day. On most days like today I don't even eat 2,000. Today I only ate right over 1500. Is this too extreme of a deficit? I'm not starving I'm eating a lot just different food that is lower calorie. Are there risks to such a large deficit? Do you think the tdee calculators and fitbit are overcalculating calories out? I would love some feedback this is weighing on my mind.

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