I've spent most of my life obese. I specifically remember having developed man tits in 3rd grade. By 6th I was 220lbs, and by 10th I was 312 at around 6'1.
When I truly found out how overweight I was, I was 17 and i got an ear infection in the winter. I went to a clinic and the doctor had me step on the scale. I was in a lot of pain thanks to my ear so I quickly sat back down not taking the time to look at my weight. So I asked the doctor what it was.
Her response petrified me, because it's really the last thing you'd expect a very polite doctor to say to you.
"Are you sure you wanna know?"
Jesus Christ, just thinking about her saying that now almost 5 years later scares me. After she told me that I had an immediate and clear goal for myself. Never be told such a thing again. I went home and my brother told me that I'm more than welcome to go to the gym with him, so I did. I spent an hour every other day on the treadmill. Slow at first, but quickly working up to 3.0MPH at a 15° incline.
I shaved off so much weight extremely quickly. By my 18th birthday, around 3 months after the ear infections, I was 280lbs. Still overweight, but I felt amazing. So I kept going. A few months later, 270. Then, beginning of my 11th grade year, 260. Finally I stagnated at 258 lbs at 6 foot 3 inches. I still was overweight but my confidence skyrocketed.
By then girls in school would talk to me, I was invited to a couple different tables at lunch (I usually ate my lunch alone and fell asleep or went for a walk around the school to burn calories) and I made some lifelong friends in those months that I was skinnier. My downfall, however, was my first girlfriend.
I met this girl in the peak of my physical being and I allowed myself to start slipping up. Lots of dates where going out to eat was pretty much mandatory. All of my money was going towards gifts, food, and more food. Not only this, but she was extremely clingy. She wanted me to do all kinds of insane shit. Read her to sleep, constantly be on the phone with her, drop all of my newly acquired friends, (especially the female ones) and she also HATED that I tried to diet and exercise because she herself was overweight and had 0 interest in changing that.
I never got rid of my friends, but the constant arguing and wanting so desperately to hold on to the only girl that's ever been romantically involved with me led me back to my horrible addiction of stress eating. Dominoes every day, more dates with my girlfriend, and at this point I don't even remember what my gym looks like.
Around 8 months after we started dating, I stepped on my bathroom scale and I almost dropped dead on the spot from embarrassment.
Three hundred and forty fucking four!
I couldn't believe it. I knew I gained weight since this relationship started but this was so unbelievable. I had gained almost 100lbs in 8 months. And for what? For fucking nothing! I lost my virginity, sure. But what does that even matter if it was to a girl you spent 8 months arguing and feeling constantly miserable with??
Around a week later, on February of 2019 I broke up with her. I was happy to be rid of her and I noticed an immediate change in my mood, but I was still deathly ashamed of what I had become. I wouldn't see myself exercising until half a year later in the summer of 2019.
By this point I had graduated high school and was on the verge of homelessness. With my mother & father out of the picture, my brother, who was taking care of me at the time, told me to kick rocks. I went to my closest friend's house and lived there for a few months. During this time I would go for very long two hour walks at around 3 in the morning. I was jobless and had some leftover cash from my mother's death to last me so I had no problem dedicating my life to just working out.
After I was out of my friend's closet, I was sitting back at my 17 year old starting weight of 312lbs. I had lost 32lbs in 7 months since I dumped my ex. I remember seeing that weight and immediately thinking of the doctor.
Are you sure you wanna know?
I never wanna hear those words again.
To make a long story short I've gotten my life somewhat together in the last year and a half. I was down to 279.8 as of last year but after another relationship (a very healthy one thankfully with a very amicable split) that ended in January of this year, I went up to 299. Thankfully I'm back down to 285 as of this morning. I don't know how long it's gonna take before Im where I wanna be, but I do know one thing.
I never wanna hear those words again.
