Dealing with annoying Asian moms and being overweight

I worked very hard to lose 10 lbs over 2 months and have been maintaining, more or less, at 170 lbs since January 2022. It was my first time actively pursuing weight loss, and I made many mistakes (like counting calories to the gram for every food, pre-planning my food, doing extreme intermittent fasting, exercising excessively). This caused me to develop some unhealthy habits and I was lucky enough to have my best friend point out these issues, to which I stopped immediately and right now I am focused on setting more sustainable habits. Despite not losing any weight since January 2022, I'm proud that I at least made a dent.

I just moved in with my mother after 9 months and to say the least, it's been mentally exhausting because I thought she would be supportive of my weight loss journey (despite the current hiatus). Instead, she has been far from encouraging.

I've learned a lot about my body over the past couple of months. For instance, I know carbs will not satiate me as well as protein or fat do, so I try to eat more of the latter two. My mother's diet is more carb heavy (rice, noodles, veggies, etc). When I told my mom I was going to eat her neglected supply of protein bars, her response was that "those are sugary and you're going to gain weight if you eat protein bars." She then continued to say "I didn't cut carbs as much as you do and I still lost weight. And I don't eat as much as you do."

I tried to explain that I am 4 inches taller than her and weigh more, so I need more calories at baseline since I am maintaining my weight and not looking to lose weight at the moment. I feel like all the science I tried to teach her just flew over her head tbh. It was very frustrating.

Then she looked at my legs and said that my legs looked like "disability legs" because they were obese. Yeah... I have no proper reaction to that except, what the f**k? That comment was wrong on so many levels. I just wanted my mom to acknowledge that I am taking a step towards bettering my health, but this is all I get. ha ha.

Anyways, that's all for my rant. I really liked the weight loss journey when I was living alone. It's been day 5 since I moved back in with my mom, and I want to pull my hair out lol

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10 pounds down! My story and need an advice!

For the context, I am 21(almost 22) female about 5'2, with starting weight of around 200lbs. My goal is to get to 130 lbs by the end of this year, although I am not strict about the timeline because I know maintaining good health is a lifestyle. I do have a question at the end that you can skip to if you don't feel like reading my history :).

I was overweight for most of my life, not a lot but usually by like 15-20 lbs. I started stress eating at a really young age (I think by the time I was 10) due to family and school stress I had growing up in India. I also started dealing with depression by this age. My family members (including extended family) constantly pointed out my weight and how I needed to lose it because it didn't look nice. They gave me nicknames like cow, pig and fatso and would even hide food from me, which ended up making me want it even more. So I think as a result, I didn't end up building a healthy relationship with food.

Things got really bad for me about 4 years ago when I was 18. I ended up falling in a really bad depression and started eating out a lot more and on top, all my friends had gotten their licenses so we would constantly go out and eat. I ended up gaining a lot of weight and reached 180lbs. When covid hit, I moved back home from college and fell into an even worse depression because of isolation and gained additional 20 lbs. I would order from uber eats and skip the dishes every day at night time when everyone was asleep so no-one would see me eating. I would binge at night time. My dad even said that he was embarrassed to be seen with me.

My mother and a friend recommended that I start eating healthy and working out to improve my health and I really wanted to as well (they didn't come from a bad place, they cared more about my health than appearance but they also doesn't understand mental health). I watched lots of videos on youtube and started learning about nutrition and ended up losing around 25 lbs. But as the school year started again and due to some family tensions, I ended up falling into the worst depression of my life and got back into binging. I also felt pretty ashamed about losing on the progress I had made so far and almost ended up being bulimic.

I have been working on my mental health for the past year and I have slowly started to get better. I feel more like myself now. I don't care about my appearance but this pandemic has really made me realize that I need to be in good health, especially since I have hereditary lung and heart issues. I slowly made changes and on April 25, 2022, started to eat a bit healthier (started with 1390 calories a day since I don't do extensive exercise). I was under-eating at first but now I am eating a diet that is closer to this calorie mark.

Today (May 11, 2022), I stepped on the scale and I was down to 190 lbs. While I am proud, I am also a bit concerned that I am losing the weight a bit too fast. I was on my periods at the beginning so it could be possible that my starting weight was a bit less than 200 lbs because I always bloat during that time of the month. But I do want to slow the process down because I know that rapid weight loss can lead to excess skin, poor metabolism and even gall stones. I was wondering if there is any advice for me that I could implement for my journey.

Sorry I know this was a bit long but I wanted to share my history. If you read it all, thank you for reading my story.

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Anyone else feel horrible after eating a lot of food/calories?

I'm not just talking about feeling guilt, the physical feeling of being stuffed is so unbearable to me, and I get full a lot quicker than I used to. For context, I've been losing weight for the past 2-3 months, and every time I have a "cheat meal" because I'm really craving something, I feel awful afterwards because of the feeling of being full. It has to do with guilt too and worrying about having eaten too many calories, but at the same time my body feels worse right after eating and even the next day.The worse thing is I know I'll do it again in a week or two. Even if it doesnt hurt my weight loss that much, I'd like to stop this vicious cycle I have with food. Does this happen to anyone else? I'm someone who used to binge eat a lot (stress eating) and consume way too many calories, so being so repulsed by the feeling I get after one of these meals is kind of new to me.

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Help understanding plateaus?

So I started my weight loss journey 18 months ago. I was 168kg (370pounds) at my heaviest, and now I'm currently 124kg (270pounds). In the first 6 months I lost about 35kg and plateaued around 130kg for about 9 months. 2 months ago I was 138kg and I really put in effort and got down to 124kg in 2 months. For the last 2 weeks but I've done everything the same but hover around 124 to 125kg. What am I doing wrong. My eating and exercise habits the same as when I lost 14kg in 2 months.

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When did you finally see the difference?

I am a 28 year old female. May 2020 I was at my highest weight, 246 pounds. I am 5'3". Since then I've lost 70 and am currently at 175. The first year of my weight loss is when I lost the big portion of weight, about 50 pounds solely through dieting. I sorta stopped doing anything for awhile, though still eating "better" and stayed in the 190s until I regained my focus and lost another 20 just through changing eating behavior. I started walking more regularly last month and this month I've committed to working out 5-6 days a week for 30 minutes. I got over the initial soreness and am feeling awesome and actually look forward to my work out now.

However, even though old clothes feel looser and I notice my face is much slimmer... I just can't see it any where else. I compare to old photos and sure there is a difference, but when I am staring at my naked body in the mirror it seems as if I am still staring down a girl who's nearly 250 pounds.

I know I have more work ahead, that body dysmorphia is real and I'm working hard to lose another 40... but when does it click in that you look different? Did it ever for you? At what weight does my belly finally start shrinking? Like I keep wondering what that magic number is going to be where I notice it not hanging over my pubic region.

So I guess this is for people who have also had about 100 pounds to lose and have or are close to it. About what amount of weight loss was it for you when you finally realized hey, I'm looking better?

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If you could go back in time to the moment you actively started working on yourself and your weight loss, what would you say or do?

There are multiple things I’d tell myself.

1) I (and everyone) was never valued less because of my weight.

2) Hitting my goal weight is amazing and should be celebrated, but the work I put in to get there is the foundation for a lifetime of work to remain consistently healthy.

3) Be kind to my body. It’s worked hard to keep me alive. The least I can do is return the favor in sustainable and healthy ways.

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Never felt worse in my life.

Hi there. I’ve been a long time lurker of this sub and I truly enjoy seeing peoples progress. I’ve gained about 45 lbs over the last couple of years. I’m 5’3 and my usual weight is around 120. I’m now 165. At 26, I’ve never felt worse about myself. I’ve tried to go into a calorie deficit and exercise but I’ve always fallen off the wagon. I’ve definitely hit rock bottom and my mental health is at its lowest. I could use words of encouragement from people who are experienced with weight loss. How did you guys start and go about your journey? What is the mindset you have on a daily basis? I’m so tired of crying and feeling like this. I wanna look happy and confident and stop being celibate because I’m so embarrassed of my body.

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