Sunday, March 9, 2025

Losing control around best friend

I’ve always had a bingeing problem with sweets. It’s been the hardest thing for me to manage while trying to lose weight. My best friend struggled with eating disorders on the restriction side growing up so I try not to get too into detail about my weight loss or seem like I’m restricting myself too heavily around her because I worry she will perceive it as ED related behavior due to her past. However, as a result of this I often end up getting foods with her that I simply cannot have around and it becomes a problem. For example, yesterday we went for a hike and she wanted to stop at the nearby grocery store for sweet snacks on the way home. I would’ve been content heading straight home but I went with since we had carpooled and ended up getting a pack of cookies, which I then ate all of when I got home, and then devolved into an all-out binge for the rest of the night and set me back past the landmark weight I had reached a few days ago. I now feel like crap and, of course, theres nothing much to be done about it besides getting my head back on straight and plugging on forward, but I still feel frustrated and just wish we had gone straight home or that I would have had the willpower to not grab the cookies despite standing in the aisle for 10 minutes while my friend picked out her snacks. I suppose this is more of a rant/vent than anything else but, has anyone else had similar experiences of somewhat mutually-triggering relationships? How do you set and enforce boundaries around food without making things awkward around people who have complicated food relationships?

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Saturday, March 8, 2025

Out of control sweet tooth after weight loss???

Hello everyone,

I’m reaching out because I’ve been struggling with a strong sweet tooth that’s become quite challenging for me. I’m an 18-year-old female, 5'7", and I’ve successfully lost 66 lbs over the past year. My current weight fluctuates between 129-133 lbs, and I’m aiming to reach 124 lbs.

While I managed to stick to a diet during my weight loss journey—despite occasional slip-ups—I find myself facing intense cravings for sweets now that I’m in maintenance. I don't crave sodas or any sweet drinks,infact I haven't had a soda in a year.My go-to treats include peanut butter, sweet biscuits, powdered milk,chocolate bars fudge, cake, and various sweet snacks and baked goods,since I've been in a deficit my grandma started baking every week(talk about enemy of progress lmao)but I can't resist.Last year it was a breeze and I hardly consumed sugar but now I can barely control my cravings for about two weeks each month,after that, the cravings become overwhelming. I genuinely want to break this habit and learn how to manage my sweet tooth more effectively.

Does anyone have tips or strategies for overcoming these cravings? I would greatly appreciate any advice!(I wrote this while eating a coconut bun:(please help me!!

Thank you!

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Will I have loose skin? (253lbs to 209lbs)

Hello! I am a teen boy (15), that started a weight loss journey from 265lbs/ 120kg. I am now 253lbs/115kg. My goal weight is 209lbs/95kg. My height is 1,75, about 5’10.

My questions: Will I have loose skin? If so, will it a be a lot? Where will it be? Can I prevent it? I am really worried, about it, and have many insecurities. I would really appreciate it if you could answer these questions.

Thank you in advance. I would also appreciate any advice on losing weight. Have a good day!


My backstory: (because it’s not letting me post this).

I started gaining weight almost 4 years ago, during the quarantine, which I tend to think it’s normal, since there was little to no exercise. I tried to lose weight with a nutritionist, but I quit after some weeks, maybe because I wasn’t determined enough, or because I have double glucose levels than normal, and I get really hungry. This time, I am determined to lose weight and feel “normal” again.

Because it’s no lie, that people treat you differently when you are overweight. The “no wonder you’re fat” looks at restaurants, the bullying at school and out of school, even random people giving me tips to live a “healthy and happy life”. And I am so tired of it. I am tired of being an outsider just because I got a belly. It’s making me sick.

I am not doing this for them though. I do it for myself. For my own health and my own benefit. And nothing is gonna stop me this time. (this feels like a trauma dump but ignore it.)

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Friday, March 7, 2025

What's a good estimate for a safe calorie target for my situation?

I am a 36M that weighs about 260 pounds and is 6'0, and I'd like to get to about 200 lbs as a medium length goal (amd reevaluate after). According to TDEE calculators, my BMR should be about 2300 calories per day, and I generally burn about 1500 calories per week via exercise.

I know I won't get a super accurate value without seeing a specialist, but I thought I might get an idea of general idea to shoot for. Some places say that 2 lb/week is a good rule of thumb maximum safe loss rate, while other places say that losing 1% of current weight (or 2.6 lb/week for me at the current moment in time) is fine as long as one is getting all the nutrients I need.

I've experimented and can comfortably sustain 1000 calorie diets in terms of hunger and general wellness/energy levels for good lengths of time, but I don't want to run afoul of longer term issues linked to too quick weight loss like gallstones. Assuming I can create a diet with the needed nutrients, would 1200 calories per day be likely to be safe, or should I go for something like 1500 instead?

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how does one stay confident after losing?

I've started weight loss over this past month? (always been bad with times, please excuse me) and im getting close to losing 60 pounds total (around 41 lost). I mainly started because I was tired of being out of breath and I wanted to be more conventionally attractive and move away from sweaters that give me heat strokes in the summer. But everytime I think about all the loose skin im going to have I get queasy. If I save enough I could afford surgery, but I'd rather not because of the risks associated. How do people who have lost stay happy and confident? Ik some take the "its a sign of your progress" view, but when youre losing so you can feel less ugly that really doesnt help, especially because it feels more of a punishment than anything.

For the record, loose skin does not mean i'm going to stop losing. Being ugly but slim will be 10x better than ugly but fat. I just dont know how ill ever wear anything other than sweaters, or how to love myself if no matter what i do i cant anyway. Is there something other than surgery I can try to tighten the skin? Ive heard muscles help, and I suppose it is an option, but ive always preferred a smooth plane to muscles. Anything is appreciated.

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Thursday, March 6, 2025

My struggle with my weight loss journey

Hi everyone!

I've frequented this sub for a while but have never posted. I wanted to share my weight loss/gain experience and current frustration with weight loss. For starters, I'm a 5 foot 1, 25 yr old female for reference.

I was at my heaviest at one point in 2021 at around 185lbs. Then became determined and managed to begin my weight loss journey. I was a recent college grad and unemployed so that gave me a lot of free time to spend in the gym. I recall being aware of my eating but I was not in a strict diet per say, but I did begin going to the gym 5x a week and walking on the treadmill on 12 incline 3 speed for 30 minutes 4x a week. By March 2022 I was 171lbs and then:

May 2022: 160.6 lbs

July 2022: 148.8 lbs

November 2022: 141.2 lbs

February 2023: 140.4 lbs

I started gaining my weight back in Spring 2023. By June 2023 I was 148lbs and I stopped weighing myself for a while and when I stepped back on the scale in December 2023 I was 156lbs, and in June 2024 I was around 160lbs.

Fast forward to now (March 6, 2025) I have progressively gained weight and am now at 174lbs. Essentially gaining almost all my weight back. I do want to add that in August 2022 I began my first office job that provides us with one to many snacks and slowly I do see that it did not help as I constantly would pick at the snacks. In the time since spring 2023 when my weight gain began again, I continued to go to the gym and have not gone more than a week without going since the beginning of my journey. That has been a lifestyle change that I have successfully been able to maintain, I do see improvements in my strength training and I'm sure a couple of the pounds gained can be attributed to muscle growth.

I began doing a cycling class at some point in late 2022 and have done that once a week since then and have begun doing a cycling class twice a week starting in January 2025. I did however stop doing inclined walking for several months because I found it to be a chore, but have now began to log 8-10k steps for the last week or so (my average steps have been no more than 4-6k even in 2022-2024).

I truly want to lose 25 pounds but feel semi-defeated that despite my lifestyle change in going to the gym (3-5x a week) I have still gained 35 pounds in 2 years. My relationship with eating is complicated, I constantly crave sweets and can't seem to say no when offered, and find it difficult to control my portions or sit with being hungry. Does anyone have any advice for someone at my height and weight?

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I lost 30lbs and it feels weird and amazing

Hey everyone, long-time lurker here, and I wanted to share a bit of my journey!

Last year, I weighed in at 80.1kg (176.5 lbs), which was the heaviest I’d ever been. At my height of 165cm (roughly 5'5"), it really scared me. I’ve always had a complicated relationship with food and exercise—my ADHD often made me hyperfocus, leading to crash diets and unhealthy habits like obsessive eating disorders.

However, this time, I didn’t focus solely on weight loss. Instead, I was working on improving my art and other personal growth, and my weight loss happened as a "background process." This shift in mindset turned into a really healthy, lifestyle-changing experience.

Losing weight became second nature, and over the course of a year, I lost 13kg (around 30lbs)—slower than average, but I’m happy with the progress. I now weigh 67kg (147lbs).

The upsides have been incredible: people treat me better, I get more attention from guys, my personal aesthetic (think early 00s emo with swoopy hair and eyeliner) suits me better, and my features are looking more androgynous. I've even had queer men hit on me, which is such a sweet compliment (even though I’m AFAB). It feels like I’m finally conquering that boss in a video game that defeated me a thousand times.

However, I still struggle with body dysmorphia. I sometimes catch myself thinking I'm still overweight—like when I see a small pair of pants and assume they won’t fit, or make comments like, "I’m not sitting on that chair, it might break," only for my friends to look at me like I’m crazy. I’m still scared to sit on people’s laps and sometimes feel the same when I look in the mirror.

I’m hoping that, over time, my mind will catch up with my body and that these feelings will fade.

I know my story might not be as dramatic or extreme as some others here, but I’m grateful to have a place to share this small but meaningful change.

I’m currently at the halfway point of my journey, and my goal is to eventually reach 58kg (127lbs), if it’s sustainable and feels right.

Thanks for reading, and I’m excited to continue this journey!

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