The ONLY mindset that made me lose weight

Hi!

I am inspired by this entire community and wanted to share my own advice on what worked for me when I had to lose weight. That still works whenever I need it again. Now with pandemic-kilos for example.

This is my personal opinions and my own experience but I write this because I truly think it works wonders. I used to watch videos on YouTube and have apps and so on that had me inspired for a day or two. Guys with six packs on YouTube who said stuff like “you have to aim for working out 5 times a week, no excuses” or things like that. It didn’t keep me motivated nor did it provide a realistic way of achieving my goals. After a while of almost giving up and feeling bad about myself every time I didn’t succeed, I started thinking like this; “All you have to do is go to the gym/(or whatever place it is you do your workouts). Then you can go home.”

What happened is I went more often. And once I was at the gym I always wanted to at least walk on the treadmill for a little bit and sometimes even do a whole workout. I removed pressure and promised myself that if I went there and didn’t want to workout at all, I could go home. But that never happened. And if it would have it would’ve been ok, but this is a psychological trick that literally changed everything for me. Small baby steps is key, working out for 15 minutes three times a week was big progress. And it will feel so much better, like you achieved something, even if it wasn’t “a whole workout”. You went, you did something and you are making progress.

The second biggest thing about this is that it creates routine, which is absolute key to successful weight loss. For many of us I think the gym/where you workout can be an anxious place. Going there more often will familiarise it, make it easier to just go there without much thought. It will also set your body up for regular exercise, rather than having these “working out all the time for a month and then not at all for 11 months” kind of thing, that I experienced a lot before this. I used to not be able to run for 5 minutes, now I run for 60 minutes and feel good. Most importantly, it has stayed (sort of) that way for FOUR YEARS. Only because whenever I’m not top game (which is 95% of time) I think those words in my head and I go and I make little progress.

During the pandemic I realise the gym might not be the place to be, but this technique could be applied at home too, just not as effectively. Tell yourself “I will just put on my gym clothes, lay out the yoga mat and get on it - then we’ll see”. It’s not a technique I think works at all as good as you’re still at home, maybe near Tv/bed etc but it just might do the trick.

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A question for the ex-obese people that are currently dating.

I've had this debate with my friends. The question basically was if I would date women who rejected me in the past before I lost weight, and then became interested after I lost the weight.

Since I was the only one out of my friend group that lost weight, I had my own answer for that question, but I'm kind of curious what's it been like for you all, and what you would do?

My answer to this question was that I probably wouldn't be able to look past the rejection. I can always forgive, but the damage has already been done. I do get that people would probably not want to date you for being obese, and that's totally ok. But for me, I think way deeper, which honestly might be a bad thing. But I think about how she probably dated other people, didn't work out so settled for me because she knows I used to like her. Things like that you know, there's more stuff to it but I hope you all get what I mean by this.

Everyone has different reasons, and I'm kind of curious to hear about your experiences with people who rejected you in the past, and then suddenly hit you up after you lost weight and got fit.

The question is: Would you date someone who rejected you in the past before losing weight, and then seemingly became way more interested after weight loss? Or better yet, give them a chance depending on how you got rejected?

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Almost under 290!

20F, SW 296, CW 293, GW 170

Hey everyone! I wanted to share some good news regarding my weight loss journey. I have been steadily losing weight in the past week! This is due to the weather we have been having in TX; I can’t drive anywhere to order fast food and I can’t order UberEats or DoorDash either! I haven’t had takeout since February 13th and I don’t crave it anymore. There’s not as much food in the house to eat since we have been eating it since Sunday and none of us are able (or willing) to go to the store. I have been making healthy meals and I’m not gonna lie, I have seen a difference since quitting takeout, even if it hasn’t been a week. This is the push I needed to stop my cravings and I am so happy. I used to crave fast food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, plus dessert on top of that. Now, none of that sounds appetizing at all. It’s actually kind of fun to cook for myself! Things are looking up :)

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Losing weight while starting a medication that will make you gain weight

Hello! I’m currently a month into my weight loss journey, and it’s going pretty steady! I’m F18 at 5’3” 174lb, trying to get down to 125 in the next year or so. Eating 1350 calories a day at a 500 calorie deficit from my maintenance calories, while only eating smaller portions of foods I generally eat, so I don’t feel too constrained. Life’s pretty good, I guess.

However, my mental health has been flagging, and pretty severely. I want to talk to my psychiatrist about restarting a medication that helped immensely but also made me gain weight (Lexapro). Is it possible to keep losing weight while starting a medication that makes you gain?

Thanks so much!

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I wonder if excitement and enthusiasm even matters ...

I'm so NOT excited about losing weight. I have lost it before, however, last March, and I know how it all works now ... and it's working again now that I am back to it, the difference is that last year I was super excited, and this year I am not excited AT ALL. You know what ? So far the results have been the same. Basically predictable weight loss, because all that matters is calories and consistency. I'm starting to think enthusiasm and motivation is really over rated. Not just in weight loss but in all things.

I'd much rather be excited like I was last year, eagerly waiting for every chance to weigh in, excited about progress, etc, .. maybe part of the reason I'm not very excited about it is because the weight I'm losing now is weight I gained back, so its like just taking it day by day to get back to where I was. But it is more than that .. even when I think about being the weight I was, even smaller, I just don't feel any excitement for it for some reason, I don't know why. It's like a chore, like mowing the lawn or something, where you just have to do it even though it isn't any fun.

I keep thinking I might feel differently about it after a few weeks, so far it has only been days, and I hope I feel more excited about it, I guess ?

Yet in a weird way it is also somewhat reassuring that you don't have to feel motivated, because motivation fades, excitement wears off, enthusiasm wanes, .. and in the end all that really seems to matter is that you just keep doing what you're supposed to be doing day after day, relentlessly.

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Day 1? Starting your weight loss journey on Thursday, 18 February 2021? Start here!

Today is your Day 1?

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Welcome to r/Loseit!

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So you aren’t sure of how to start? Don’t worry! “How do I get started?” is our most asked question. r/Loseit has helped our users lose over 1,000,000 recorded pounds and these are the steps that we’ve found most useful for getting started.

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Why you’re overweight

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Our bodies are amazing (yes, yours too!). In order to survive before supermarkets, we had to be able to store energy to get us through lean times, we store this energy as adipose fat tissue. If you put more energy into your body than it needs, it stores it, for (potential) later use. When you put in less than it needs, it uses the stored energy. The more energy you have stored, the more overweight you are. The trick is to get your body to use the stored energy, which can only be done if you give it less energy than it needs, consistently.

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Before You Start

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The very first step is calculating your calorie needs. You can do that HERE. This will give you an approximation of your calorie needs for the day. The next step is to figure how quickly you want to lose the fat. One pound of fat is equal to 3500 calories. So to lose 1 pound of fat per week you will need to consume 500 calories less than your TDEE (daily calorie needs from the link above). 750 calories less will result in 1.5 pounds and 1000 calories is an aggressive 2 pounds per week.

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Tracking

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Here is where it begins to resemble work. The most efficient way to lose the weight you desire is to track your calorie intake. This has gotten much simpler over the years and today it can be done right from your smartphone or computer. r/loseit recommends an app like MyFitnessPal, Loseit! (unaffiliated), or Cronometer. Create an account and be honest with it about your current stats, activities, and goals. This is your tracker and no one else needs to see it so don’t cheat the numbers. You’ll find large user created databases that make logging and tracking your food and drinks easy with just the tap of the screen or the push of a button. We also highly recommend the use of a digital kitchen scale for accuracy. Knowing how much of what you're eating is more important than what you're eating. Why? This may explain it.

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Creating Your Deficit

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How do you create a deficit? This is up to you. r/loseit has a few recommendations but ultimately that decision is yours. There is no perfect diet for everyone. There is a perfect diet for you and you can create it. You can eat less of exactly what you eat now. If you like pizza you can have pizza. Have 2 slices instead of 4. You can try lower calorie replacements for calorie dense foods. Some of the communities favorites are cauliflower rice, zucchini noodles, spaghetti squash in place of their more calorie rich cousins. If it appeals to you an entire dietary change like Keto, Paleo, Vegetarian.

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The most important thing to remember is that this selection of foods works for you. Sustainability is the key to long term weight management success. If you hate what you’re eating you won’t stick to it.

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Exercise

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Is NOT mandatory. You can lose fat and create a deficit through diet alone. There is no requirement of exercise to lose weight.

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It has it’s own benefits though. You will burn extra calories. Exercise is shown to be beneficial to mental health and creates an endorphin rush as well. It makes people feel *awesome* and has been linked to higher rates of long term success when physical activity is included in lifestyle changes.

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Crawl, Walk, Run

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It can seem like one needs to make a 180 degree course correction to find success. That isn’t necessarily true. Many of our users find that creating small initial changes that build a foundation allows them to progress forward in even, sustained, increments.

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Acceptance

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You will struggle. We have all struggled. This is natural. There is no tip or trick to get through this though. We encourage you to recognize why you are struggling and forgive yourself for whatever reason that may be. If you overindulged at your last meal that is ok. You can resolve to make the next meal better.

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Do not let the pursuit of perfect get in the way of progress. We don’t need perfect. We just want better.

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Additional resources

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Now you’re ready to do this. Here are more details, that may help you refine your plan.

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• Quick Start Guide - Build your foundation!

* Lose It Compendium - Frame it out!

* FAQ - Answers to our most Frequently Asked Questions!

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Almost got attacked on my walk

Sorry if this isn't allowed. I just kind of needed to vent. I'm currently on a weight loss journey (SW:205, CW:178, GW:150, F28 5'11) and I've been going on bi-weekly walks in the ravine by my house. I've done some home workouts but I love the outdoors and really enjoy going for long walks to do my cardio.

Yesterday, a man approached me on a very secluded part of the trail and attempted to get me to follow him into the woods. I tried to fast walk away until I realized he was following me and I ended up having to run up a big flight of stairs to loose him. It was one of the scariest moments of my life.

Now I just feel angry and hopeless. The gyms are closed where I live and the busy streets near me aren't in the best of areas either. I really loved my walks alone and I feel like that was robbed of me.

I hope to go back one day, with some animal spray and a friend. But with covid and stuff I'm having trouble thinking of some winter cardio I can do and still feel safe.

But, just a small NSV, I didn't binge eat to comfort myself. Which is huge and a big win.

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