Anyone feel like they ‘lost’ years of their life due to their weight?

Currently 25 and I’ve been through 3 major weight loss transformations, and counting the yoyo weight I’ve lost around 100kgs (220lbs).

I always let my weight dictate my mood and what I should wear and how I should feel. It made me much more closeted and feel unwanted, especially sexually. It made me too nervous to date and sexually explore and would hinder friendships cuz I felt different.

I’m now 68kgs (149lbs), the lightest I’ve been since I was probably 12. I’m in a fantastic relationship, and I can even fit into my partners pants comfortably who have been thin their entire lives but I can’t help but feel detached. Hearing their stories about when they were in their twenties (they’re 5 years older than me) I feel this sort of envy, like I wanted all that sexual exploration and adventure for myself but I didn’t let myself do it.

Looking in the mirror doesn’t fill me with great confidence and I’m probably at my worst with body dysmorphia. Still have fat in inconvenient locations with stretch marks to boot. Feels like I’m forever scared by my weight which saps any confidence I could have.

This is more a rant than anything but wondered if anyone else had similar experiences with this where even with great change it feels like you’re still the same, filled with regret about the past?

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First real setback, advice appreciated

I had my weight loss journey a few years ago where I lost close to 50kg over about a year, and it felt amazing. Everything was easier, both literally and figuratively.

It really helped that I had a fairly active day job, and was able to bike to and from work, so my maintenance period felt okay.

Fast forward to right now things feel very different. I eat more than before. I eat more often than before. I'm back to snacking, eating candy alone, and sneak eating candy even though I know I shouldn't. I really feel like I'm losing control several times per day, and just eat and eat.

I weighted myself today as well and I am now up to 94kg. 10-12kg more than I was a year ago, and it hurts.

A part of me want to excuse this on account of having two active kids which drain me of energy, a full time work as a teacher and also studying for my master's degree.

But those feel like empty excuses. I hate how much I'm eating. I hate how little I'm exercising. And most of all, I hate how I'm losing control.

Today I started writing my journal again which helped a lot during my last slight setback, but I am still afraid that my motivation will falter when I'm hungry, or when we're traveling to relatives for Easter and candy will be plentiful.

Something that really helped me last time was writing a log of what I'm eating in a day, and also knowing that I would be showing it to other people. I had a counselor which met with me every other week. I really miss having that. I have asked my sister and my wife to read my log so that I'm accountable, but they really weren't comfortable with reading it based on their own history of struggling with weight loss and food.

I find my thoughts always finding excuses to eat candy, and a whole lot of promises of "a little bit is okay" and "we're stopping after Easter" or "after winter" but there is always another reason to have snacks and candy. This has been going on since before Christmas when I realized how my suit was way to tight.

So all in all, I feel really bummed out. This morning has been good, in regards to food and snacking, but the hard part seems to continue doing good.

Thanks for reading my thoughts and worries :) Any advice is appreciated, and I already feel better having written this down somewhere people can read it.

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End Emotional Eating?

I've been on a constant fight against myself to lose fat from the start of middle school to present day highschool senior. I've come a long way from researching on how stuff works watching videos and looking at many tips. So I'm already quite knowledgeable on how to lose fat, but I haven't been able to and now I have completely stopped from my journey. I want to go back. I want to actually lose this fat that I hate with every fiber of my being.

I'm an 18yr old male, I am 6'1 and currently weigh 230. ( Lowest weight ever was 215/220)

I will be very honest, I love eating. If I stop eating I feel depressed. Although I'm full aware it's my fault that I'm unable to make sacrifices, it hurts. It mentally hurts maybe even physically, to the point where I breathe heavier and have an urge to tear through my face. Whenever someone offers me food I can't help but to not say no. It's driving me crazy. The days I accidentally eat too much I just cheat because I feel extremely defeated and say I will try the next day, and then say I will try the next week and then so on. I probably have some actual problem with myself because I do hurt myself ( mostly punching myself in the face or stomach or extreme thought of cutting off the fat) when I eat too much and usually happens when I binge after accidentally overeating. I also noticed that when I'm in my weight loss journey I become unable to socialize as I get more awkward and nervous but get more confident and charismatic when I'm not.

Intermittent fasting has helped the most (although eating at a calorie deficit would probably give me the best results, it usually overwhelms me and I binge). I don't feel any hunger until 1PM but I usually go until it's time to eat lunch which is usually 4PM. The biggest issue though is school. At school we eat at somewhere around at 11AM and my god I feel hungry. My friends eating around me the vending machine's chips are calling out to me I've only went 3 times successfully without eating at school. I eventually caved in and ate the chicken sandwich.

All I'm asking for is advice or just your experiences and how you overcame them. Don't care if the advice is harsh or straight up simple about something I already know. Perhaps people getting mad at me giving me lectures will help me. Idk I just want to be confident in my own skin and finally stop the number 1 problem (imo) in my life.

Note: I do workout at the gym mostly on weights, but I keep getting sick and injured (not from the gym). I try to do some cardio I even want to run outside but it's also another huge mental barrier even though i was consistent back then, I got extremely sick and stopped doing cardio.

Sorry for vent-ish?

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I cant get out of maintenance mode

This summer I did a hospital monitored diet of 800 calories per day for 12 weeks. It consisted of shakes, soups and bars. I went from 192 to 166 (F/5'7). I've been toggling between 166 and 176 since end of November! My weaknesses are dining out and alcohol. I know by consumimg too many calories I'm inhibiting my weight loss..I do group circuit trainings (weight/cardio) 4 to 5 days a week so I know this is helping me from gaining more weight. Man, why am I so weak? How do I get rid of the F it mentality on days I over consume? I guess I need some motivation rather than wanting to get into my size 10/M clothes.

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obsessed with weight loss anyone else?

so ever since i started losing weight about 10 months ago, it becomes more and more obsessive i go to sleep and wake up thinking about losing weight, sometimes i have an irrational fear that i have eaten too much even though i know i haven't, i am diagnosed with ocd

sometimes i just wish that time would pass faster, or that the day would end soon just so i can do it all over again the next morning

today I did 2 hours of light walking but it was because I really like it

I used to weigh 145kg, now I weigh 91kg and I'm 186cm, being skinny right now is all I want, I just can't fail, I'm 18 but I've lost 6 years of my life because of ocd which led to depression and morbid obesity

I learned the importance of eating healthy so I never went to extremes but I've thought about it a few times

I can't fail I've wasted too much time of my life, I'm probably obsessed I don't know but I honestly don't care, it's all I want in the world, I'm going to get it anyway preferably in a healthy way like I did for 10 months

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Fitbit accuracy and energy burn

In January and early February I tried to aggressively lose weight. I was exercising and kept calories at a loss rate of 1.5 pounds a week by fitbit. I didn’t lose a pound. As a 200+ pound female I should have loss and was frustrated, but I reminded myself that sometimes when I try too hard my body resists. I took a few weeks to reset my thought process.

In March I changed a couple things up. First I decided to reduce my weight loss goal to 1 pound a week. If I felt like eating less I did, but was totally fine with eating back exercise calories and losing just a pound a week.

Second I kept a note in my phone where I recorded calories in, fitbit calories out, the difference I “should” have lost if everything was accurate, and converted that difference to pounds lost over time. I’m a data nerd and was curious if my not losing in January was truly my body fighting it because I was too aggressive, or if I am not accurate with calorie logging or calories burned.

I DO estimate plenty. I try to be accurate but ultimately take my best guess and move on. Also I eat A LOT. I was sticking to 1600-1700 in January and it wasn’t working. In March I ate most days between 1850 and 2100. A couple of days I ate about 1400 because I felt like it. A few days I ate 2300-2400.

Most days my Fitbit had me burning 2400-2900 calories. I am active several hours at work and most often got 10,000 steps. Weekends usually 7,500. No other exercise.

On March 1st I weighed 222 pounds. On April 1st I weighed 216 pounds. My month of data estimated I should have lost 5.8 pounds.

2 HUGE takeaways for me. First, my Fitbit is pretty accurate and I do burn a lot of energy each day. Second, it is easier for me to lose weight eating close to 2000 calories than to restrict further.

Finally, weight loss is not linear. At one point I had estimated I had lost 4 pounds by data but the scale said 5, and then bounced to 2, for a few days. All the while I kept counting calories and eventually the scale figured itself out.

Hoping this gives hope to those struggling with weight loss. I plan to track through May.

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Weight Loss after Weight Gain

Hi everyone! I am a 22F who lost 120 lbs in 2019/2020. I did struggle with an eating disorder for about 50% of that weight loss but did lose the other 50% healthily. I have a quick question and would really appreciate any insight some of you may have …

Although I did lose a lot of weight (and I am really proud of myself for doing so) I gained about 15-20 lbs (lowest weight was 140) over the last year. In 2022 there was a lot of really difficult personal matters happening and I wasn’t able to make it to the gym as often. In 2021 I was going 5x a week, getting ample cardio in, etc. In 2022, I was lucky to be in the gym 3x a week (strength training, no cardio) at most due to other items I was dealing with (not health related).

I have now been recovered from my ED for about 2 years and have healthy digestion. That being said, I gained plenty of weight last year and I have been trying to get it off the last 3 months and continue to idle at 155-158 while working out 4-5x a week (strength training, .5-1 mile of cardio). I don’t know if there is anything anyone recommends or has insight on, I just know I felt healthiest and most confident at 140-145 and the extra 10-15 is really stubborn!

I will note that I have seen my face slightly slim out again the last few months but I have not seen much (documented) progress elsewhere.

Additional info: Height: 5’3 SW: 270 CW: 155 LW: 140

Non-drinker, non-smoker, 90-100 oz water on avg/day, averaging 1500-1600 calories, sleeping 7-8 hours per night

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