18F 5'6" CW 170 SW 185 LW 159 GW 152. Gave up on weight loss after my weight stagnated at 162 pounds, and I wasn't willing to further cut my calorie count, which I was already struggling not to surpass. Gained 8 pounds in three months because I completely quit working out and eating well. Now I've entered a depressive episode, which has made weight loss fucking suck. I was able to lose weight the first time because I was excited about it, motivated, and feeling proud of myself every day. Now I'm struggling with anxiety, depression, and OCD symptoms that have started to reduce my ability to function normally, let alone lose weight.
I'm eating 1300 calories a day and going on walks around the neighborhood daily. Haven't been able to force my ass into the gym yet because my motivation is impure; I want to lose weight because I'm angry at myself for letting myself go after I was so close to my goal. When I was motivated and happy to be taking on this challenge, weight loss was easy. Now it sucks. I'm only back playing this weight loss game because I failed, and a failure so late in the game is kinda hard to deal with. I don't have much weight to lose, which makes it hurt more — it shouldn't be so hard, yet I'm failing.
Looking for others who have struggled with similar mindsets for some advice here. Is it even worth trying to lose weight if my head's not right? How have you overcome mental hurdles in your weight loss journey? Any input is appreciated, thank you!
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