is there a right mindset for weight loss?

Hey lovely people,

I've recently thought and read about how the "right" mindset can be of benefit for weight loss. For example someone wrote that one has to adapt a way of thinking that thin people have. That they do not constantly think about weight loss and that they naturally eat smaller portion sizes and make healthier food choices.

I'm technically not overweight but I would like to lose 10-20 pounds (yes I would still be in the healthy range) and last year I actually was 10 pounds lighter. I then was going through an emotionally challenging time and I had no time to think about food yet I ate somewhat healthy. I still remember how good I felt in my body, how my clothes would fit me better and how my skin was glowing. So albeit I was depressed, I felt more at ease with my physical state.

Therefore I now try to eat healthy all the time and track calories. Yet it is hard for me to maintain my past-self's mindset. I just had the idea that maybe I should not clinge to the old one but to create myself a new thinner future-self mindset. Does that even make sense?^^ Has anyone tried this psychological approach to weight loss before? Maybe in combination with meditation?

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Feeling like I've failed

I'm hoping this great community can help me. I've been really successful with CICO since June. I've lost 23lbs and learned more about what my body needs to be the best me I can. My goal starting out was because I have 2 girls, 6 and 2, and I want to be here for them and be a positive role model. I want them to see a strong empowered woman and I want them to see me actively working to make myself better.

But I've messed up. I tried to keep myself talking about how I'm making myself strong, not skinny. I tell them I want to make myself feel good and not talking about being fat. Unfortunately, kids catch on to everything. Yesterday my 6 year old told me she doesn't want to gain weight or get bigger because she doesn't want to be fat.

The WHOLE reason I'm doing this is to be more body positive, but what's the point if it hurts them. I feel like I've failed just by trying.

Tldr: I tried to keep my weight loss positive, but my daughter caught on and now thinks gaining weight to grow makes her less.

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I finally understand making a “lifestyle change” and I’m a little less worried about maintenance

I’ve been on my weight loss journey since the beginning of the year (actually right after Christmas because I didn’t want it to technically be a New Years resolution I was bound to fail on).

I just hit my goal weight today! I’m super pumped and so happy that I actually made it.

A few months ago, I remember making some comments about how I was almost terrified of reaching my goal because that meant going into essentially a lifetime of maintenance. At least while losing, there was a goal, but at maintenance, there is no end and that was scary.

I always heard people talking about making it a lifestyle change instead of a diet and I guess I never really understood what that meant. I just equated it to continuing to count calories once I reached my goal weight and that was the only plan I had.

Calorie counting was the only strategy I had for my weight loss. At the beginning of my journey, it was tough to stay to my calorie limit because I didn’t want to feel like I was eliminating foods or depriving myself. After a while, I started seeking out lower calorie meals. After a while, that turned into healthier meals that were naturally lower calorie. With the majority of my food being healthy, whole foods, I was able to fit in the occasional glass of wine, cookie, ice cream, or chocolate. I didn’t really work out at all to reach my goal, but I do like being more “active” going for walks or doing yoga instead of sitting on my couch. This all happened very slowly over this period but started to make more sense and become easier.

This morning, while driving to work and reflecting on the fact that I had done it and was beginning to strategize how I would move forward, I was contemplating this idea of it being a lifestyle change, when I suddenly realized that it had been this whole time.

I don’t have the desire to go back to eating deep fried and carb heavy foods. Not only because those don’t make me feel good anymore, but also because I’m choosing to live healthier. Just because I can add a few calories back into my limit doesn’t mean I throw out all the changes I’ve made over the last months. I’ve already made the changes, and I’ve found even more foods that I love and ways to fit in the stuff that’s not so healthy that I still love in moderation. I didn’t even realize I was creating good habits this whole time and now I feel so ready to take on maintenance because it’s not something different and unknown. It’s something I’ve already mastered and I’m excited to keep doing it.

Also, I have to add in a thank you to this sub. I didn’t get really serious about my weight loss until I found you guys about a month in. When I’ve been frustrated, I’ve gotten inspiration reading people’s success stories and found comfort in other people’s rants. I appreciate all of you.

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36lbs Down in 3.5 Months!

Hello! I started trying to get healthy in April of this year(2019). I am 5’9 and clocked in at about 181lbs in April, the most I’ve ever weighed in my entire life. I’m in my late 20s so I realize that’s not a very long period of time, but when I was in my teens and early 20s I was more in the vein of 125-135lbs, though in an unhealthy means. In my teens I’d often just stop eating altogether until I dropped back down to my preferred weight. Obviously that’s not a great approach to weight loss, and I partially attest my high gain to the unhealthy lifestyle in my youth. So moving forward, I’ve attempted many diets and many workouts, none of which stuck. I hate working out deeply and could never find something I liked well enough to continue it regularly. And as for diets, they would always end with me binging immediately after the diet time frame was finished, and any minimal weight loss was undone within weeks.

I realized I needed a permanent change. In April I decided to cut all breads and beers and focus on veggies, fruits and meats. I treated it like an allergy, telling myself no instead of maybe. Within a month I was down 15lbs(166lbs) and within two months I lost another 11lbs and was down to 155lbs. I seemed to stop progress at that point, so I decided to also cut all alcohol, and that third month I made it down to 145lbs!

I’ve stayed there and fluctuated slightly between 145-148lbs but have managed to continue my diet shift, and happily. It was rough at first. The cravings were real. But after the first month I noticed that things I used to love no longer were appealing to me. I used to love candies like skittles, and deep fried foods, and now I have zero interest.

My advice for others is just what I’ve read on this sub continually. The best change is an entire life style change, and however best you can keep yourself in check and modify your eating to be healthier, the better. And mind you, I have not adopted an exercise regiment as of yet. It is something I’m planning on soon after I’m settled in from my recent move to a new home. I believe it is the next step to me being the best version of myself, inside and out.

For others who are trying to lose weight, don’t give up! There seems to be a couple of rough spots to overcome, but as long as you keep your head up and be stubborn about the change, your body will change too!

before and after

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I want to look good for my wedding, and the rest of my life.

Hey everyone! I’ve been a relatively long-time lurker, but I’ve decided I need to post and really get serious about my weight loss journey.

I’m a 25 y/o male, 6’0” and ~235 pounds. I played lacrosse in college, so I’m fairly athletic and have definitely been in good shape before. But, when I turned 21, I started drinking fairly relatively, and now I’m to the point where usually binge drink twice a week, and very often even more.

I currently have a gym membership, and over the last 11 months, I’ve been pretty good about it, but haven’t been able to get into the habit of going every day, or even 3 times a week. I’m the last month, I think I’ve gone twice... I’ve also been a lot more conscious about what I eat, but food and beer are 2 of my favorite things on earth, which makes losing weight really hard.

I just got engaged to my now fiancée, and we want to get married in April. I need to change my lifestyle and start being really healthy.

So, what are some initial tips about how to go about this? How do I stay motivated? What works best when trying to lose weight? How do I learn how to enjoy cardio (cuz I fucking hate it)? How hard is it actually going to be? Etc.

And also, how do I change my tag to say “25M, start weight: 235, goal weight 180”?

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Can someone help? I need diet advice.

Hi all—so, a short bit about me. I'm currently 235lbs and need to lose weight. Two years ago, I managed to shed about 50lbs and felt great about myself, but then I got into a relationship and let myself go and now I'm back where I started.

Three months ago, I started to diet the same way I had before, which was just controlling my calorie intake: simple as that! But, strangely, the weight wasn't falling off of me like it did before. In the first week, I lost roughly 5lbs, and then in the following SIX WEEKS I lost less than 4lbs, despite sticking strictly to my diet. So, I gave up again and ballooned to my biggest size: About 250lbs.

Three weeks ago, I started dieting again. I should probably point out here that I've tried tons of different diets, but calorie-controlled was what had worked for me before, so I decided to try it. Yet again, I had a huge loss in my first week (6lbs) but in the last two weeks combined I've only shed another 1lb.

Literally the only thing that's different to my diet two years ago is that my boyfriend is a chef and cooks dinner most nights. He is very helpful in calorie-counting, but because of his cooking know-how, he often makes meals that are fairly low-calorie but in big portions. Could the portion size be affecting my weight loss?

For a bit of extra background, I work an office job, mostly chained to a desk, so I don't get a lot of exercise, but I do go swimming once a week and take a short walk around the block every night (about 3,000 steps).

Thank you for any advice you can give!!

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I think I've pushed myself too far and fudged my metabolism.

First, a little background. I began my weight loss at the beginning of May. I began by doing about 1,000 calories a day of nearly entirely protein and vegetables with supplements to cover the vitamins and minerals lost with cutting dairy, root vegetables, and nuts. I quit drinking, and cut gluten as well. Think the ideal protien diet. Before you ask, because the calorie count is low and the diet highly restricted I am medically supervised with weekly check-ins and have experienced no problems or malnutrition.

This worked well with me shedding consistent weight but as I got further along I wanted to make adjustments to see what else I could do to avoid a plateau. I began IF and ate only between the hours of 11AM to 7PM and about 40 lbs down I began attending 60 minute hot yoga 3-4 times per week to establish a fitness regimen I can maintain after I hit my goal. I've since stalled out at 47 lbs down and can't seem to push past it the last 3 weeks. I thought at first that it was because of the exercise and I was building back muscle but my fat percentages have leveled off. I cut down to 900 calories a day a while back because I just wasn't hungry and it was difficult to fit that much food into a small window. I can't cut anymore without jeopardizing myself, and I'm similarly worried about pushing myself too hard at the studio by increasing the frequency of my workouts.

I'm panicking that I've fudged my metabolism and don't really know what to do about it. Of course when I look it up on the web, stress can play a big factor along with sleep. I'm getting less sleep because of early morning workouts, and I am constantly stressed out with this and other life issues, money, work, etc. I feel stuck in this loop of seemingly good choices and don't see a feasible way out. Any advice?

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