Talk me off a ledge - seriously considering weight loss surgery

First off - disclaimer, I hope my title didn’t make anyone who has had WLS feel bad. I just don’t know if it’s the right option but I am seriously frustrated and at a loss of what to do. More below.

So, I created this throwaway account because I am so ashamed of myself. I am 5’9 and weigh 275lbs. In December of last year I was down to 230lbs. I have gained 45lbs in ten months. And if I’m being honest with myself, it was probably more like 30lbs just over this past summer alone.

I have issues with anxiety that somehow seemed amplified by my weight loss. I had a big event in my life in April that just kind of triggered it all. I started taking an anti anxiety medicine in May and I just ate nonstop after. I just felt like I had no impulse control and no care in the world. Finally after a summer of being in a fog I decided I couldn’t take that med anymore and asked to be taken off of it. Immediately my head cleared.

I was beyond upset with myself when I stepped on the scale and saw that the three years of work I’ve put in to go from 290 to 230 has nearly been undone by a few months time. I’m devastated.

I don’t know what else to do. I’ve had all my bloodwork done and everything comes back normal. There’s no underlying condition that causes my weight. I feel like I have all the desires to fix it but lack in execution. I feel like I have a beginning and an end in mind but can’t figure out how to get from A to C.

I am ready to schedule an appointment for a sleeve consult. Or whatever surgery they find suitable. The downsides are that my insurance will not cover anything weight related. They denied contrave, denied Belviq, don’t cover anything surgical weight loss. I am trying to simultaneously save for a wedding and a house and I am so disgusted with myself that I am ready to throw all my wishes away just to stop being so fucking fat.

I desperately want to have a child one day. I am 33 years old and my window is closing. I know if I get the surgery they advise not to get pregnant for at least 16 months. That’s another dream I may have to ditch just to save myself.

I have the exercise portion down pat. I go to a boot camp style workout program 3-5 times a week. The weeks I only go 3x a week I make myself walk on the treadmill at my regular gym (yes, I am currently for two gym memberships). I have a desk job that I work long hours at, that I am lucky if I get in 1,000 steps a day. It’s brutal. So I do try and force myself to work out afterwards.

If anyone has any insight, tips, criticism, etc., give it to me. I need to be slapped upside the head and shook silly.

For the record, I am writing this from the treadmill on my phone at the gym. With tears in my eyes. But I’m here, at the gym. Step one I guess?

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A new job, a new diagnosis, and a new FitBit. How do I maximize my loses with my new knowledge and massive increase in activity?

After some mild-moderate success with keto, then having to quit due to costs of keto-friendly foods around where I was living, I gained back the 25 lbs I'd lost and gained an additional 12 lbs. I tried to ignore that, though, because we just moved to a new city and, honestly, things have been a bit of a clusterfuck. I was trying to schedule a sleep study for suspected sleep apnea (my fiance and two friends I'm nurses with said they would be shocked if I didn't have it...), look for a job, unpack, and finances were terrible.

BUT! I was finally able to get my sleep study results sent to my PCP (the only real struggle in that process), and she sent it where it was appropriate. It turns out that I basically have a severe case of severe sleep apnea (my AHI is 121--a moderate AHI is around 50-85 or so). That means that every hour I stopped breathing that many times. That's over twice a minute! I finally got my Bi-level PAP about a week after--

Starting my new job! And it's a fantastic job for weight loss. I am constantly walking or jogging and things get even more vigorous from there. What do I do? I work at a dog daycare. :) We have boarders and day campers and they all get to run around and play all day. That means I'm cleaning up after 100 or so dogs, chasing them, or being chased by them. I walked/ran a little over six miles today during a six hour shift, and this is a full time position.

Do y'all know what that means? Here's a hint... I also I started my Bi-level PAP therapy sixteen days ago! Yep! You've got the right idea. Actually getting decent sleep at night, and consistently so, plus going from sedentary to walking 5-8 miles daily five or six days a week means that I am now back to a few pounds below where I started out initially before the loss and major gain.

Working so hard to lose that weight only to gain it back, and then some, really screwed with me. I immediately found myself in the "Why bother?" mindset. That's how I gained the last nine pounds, in fact. But this time I have absolutely everything I need to succeed: I'm very active every day, I have the money for healthy foods, I have ways of tracking my food intake as well as exercise, and the health issues that were making it that much harder are now in check. What I need to know is what information regarding my activity level, sleep quality (my Fitbit tracks my sleep stages and my PAP tracks everything else), and food consumption will be useful in choosing what to eat/and when/how much? I've pretty much only focused on calories before (or fat intake as well, when doing keto), but now that I can afford healthier foods, I'd really like to use that to my advantage.

This has been almost a decade-long issue. I apologize for the length of my post, but I think it has helped get to the point faster than if obvious questions needed asking! However, if I missed something obvious, please feel free to ask. :)

Thank you all again! <3

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Pregnant and almost ready to start

First post, and I'm excited. Sorry it's long.

A little background: after i left high school, i didn't do much in the way of continuing to work out (no gym class, no swim team, meant no work out), but i also didn't really have a struggle with my metabolism. I never owned a scale or went to the Dr, so never tracked anything in any way. Years later, i found myself sitting on a suede sofa and seeing my butt print and being horrified by the size of it. Yeah, i knew my pants size was larger, but the connection wasn't there until that moment. I started a hardcore CICO diet along with a workout regimen and ended up losing about 60lbs over the course of 9 months. My goal weight was 135, and i was at 150 and a size 8. I was happy with how i looked and wasn't too worried about the last 15lbs. At around this time, i ended up getting sick and unable to eat anything. I tried keeping calories up with a liquid diet but i still ended up at 120lbs and a size 2. Way too small for my tastes. It took a long time to regain the difference, but eventually i got there.

Fast forward to major crap hitting the fan. I had a kid with my abusive (now ex) husband, we moved across the country, then eventually ended up getting divorced. It was really really messy. After the move, i had trouble finding a job. My kid was going on years of really terrible behaviors. Turned out he has ADHD. All of this less to depression episodes that kept me from getting my workout.. Add to it that I started living with someone who has poor eating habits, and you have a recipe for weight gain.

After things stabilized, my new job offers free membership to a weight loss program that i was literally just starting up when i found out i was pregnant. So now I'm told that i cannot do anything. Due to the nature of the pregnancy, I'm limited to walking (my least favorite thing to do because i have no gym access, can't afford gym access, and Los Angeles in summer is a heat stroke waiting to happen) and I'm not allowed to restrict calories in any way. So I've been maintaining. Or at least doing my best. I gained virtually nothing until month 6, which my Dr said was fine, but after that, the pounds started creeping up.

At work, i was able to get in about 10k steps a day, but as i grew, that got harder and harder until my hips started to give out around 7 months, and i was unable to go more than 3k per day. Then my immune system dropped, and I wasn't able to do my normal job. They moved me to an office position, which prevented me from walking at all during regular hours. My hips got worse and i ended up on medical leave about 6 weeks before my due date.

My weight increasing for the pregnancy at a normal rate at this point is getting me really down. I'm gaining in a healthy way and i know it will be gone in 3 weeks when she's born... And I'm trying to keep positive by knowing that I'm doing everything possible right now to stay healthy and not gain too much. But not being able to start the weight loss for another month or so (recovery) is going to weigh on my depression.

Anyways, that's my story. I'm glad that this sub exists, and I'm looking forward to starting up soon!

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My Story: How I lost 70 pounds.

Before: https://imgur.com/AHYDfKA

After: https://imgur.com/9ePh4mz

My Story: In May of 2017, I was 5'11 and 295 and miserable. I was eating myself to an early grave. I had a huge wake up call when I went to LA fitness to get my health assessed and I found out that I was at 33% body fat. I was at risk of getting type two diabetes and heart diseases. I remember how concerned I was for my health and I knew that if I didn't get my weight under control, there was a chance I was going to die early from obesity. I was overwhelmed by how much weight I had to lose. By the beginning of 2018, I was down to 225 pounds. As of recently I had my body fat percentage checked and I was at 21.2%. That is a normal body fat percentage. I am at a normal body fat percentage for the first time in years. I couldn't be more grateful for accomplishing this and I am not trying to brag but instead spread motivation to those who are struggling with their weight that it is always possible to lose weight. Don't ever give up! You got this! So how did I do it? I started off by increasing the amount of exercise that I do. That's how I lost my first 15 pounds but it still wasn't enough and I had to lose more weight. I was still eating horribly and treating my body horribly with my bad eating habits but I thought I could make up for it. Turns out that I can't. Remember that 80-90% of weight loss depends on what you eat. In October of 2017, I decided to try keto which basically meant that I cut down the amount of carbs that I eat to 20 grams a day and that my main source of calories comes from fat and protein(Mostly fat though). Throughout the next few months, I went from being 280 to 225. I have since then kept the weight off. Just wanted all of you to know that you can do anything you set your mind to. Never give up, you got this!

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Freed from OCD food addiction

I can honestly say that after doing IF 20:4 and OMAD and losing 20 lbs (which is just the beginning) I no longer feel controlled by food. I can still eat what I want, lose weight, and get all the benefits of fasting! I'm not ravenous and constantly calculating CICO and planning out my meals through the day. I understand now why they say doctors, dietitians, and weight loss "specialists" don't encourage fasting because it doesn't make them any money! Pretty sad, but I couldn't be happier that I decided to not listen to the "if you skip meals you'll actually gain weight" crowd because I have the results to prove that is not so!

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Has anyone here gone decaf? What effect did it have on your r/loseit journey?

18M/6’3” SW: 217 CW:195

There are pros and cons to caffeine consumption that have me conflicted over whether or not to quit it.

I used to only consume it once or twice a week, but in recent months I find myself drinking ~16 oz of black coffee everyday.

There’s limited evidence that caffeine temporarily increases metabolism, which may have something to do with my recent weight loss. There are also antioxidants.

But the link to anxiety and breakdown of tooth enamel has me considering going decaf.

Has anyone tried this? Or have you tried the cycling method of going decaf for 1-2 weeks every once in a while?

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From invisible to attractive

I'm sure other factors are playing a role rather than just weight loss but there has been a dramatic difference in how people treat me now verses just two weeks ago. I think it's a combination of losing weight, my skin clearing up somewhat, dressing better, wearing make up more often and my returned confidence thanks to feeling good in my body again. I have had moments in my life where I would consider myself attractive and other periods when I looked hideous. I have noticed how I act differently and people treat me differently. At this moment, men actually remember me without us ever talking or only talking briefly, they call me beautiful, pay for my drinks, are eager to text me, stare at me while passing, etc. I always thought that when men acted that way, they were just trying to charm their way into my pants, but with all the sudden attention, it makes me wonder if I'm selling myself short. Our society is obsessed with appearance and beauty, and it is truly a struggle to untangle my self-worth with how I look. The validation is a great ego boost but something that I feel a little perplexed by. I guess I just want to hear if others have similar/different stories of how they have been affected with a change in their appearance.

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