Tuesday, February 19, 2019

I feel awkward letting people know about my weight loss.

I’m sure some others, especially people who are already at a normal BMI but still losing weight, can relate. My BMI had crept up into the overweight category and I had been feeling uncomfortable in my clothes and in my body for a little while before cracking down and deciding to do something about it. My “comfy” weight where I feel best is closer to 135-140 lbs but I haven’t been there in a few years.

Now that I’ve lost 15 lbs it’s starting to be noticeable and actually I’ve gotten a few comments at work from my patients. I work as a dietitian- even we can struggle with eating right sometimes! Anyway, the comments were less “wow, you look great!” and more “are you losing weight? 🤔” I was a little caught off guard and brushed it off like “oh you know, my scrubs are just kind of baggy, I like to wear them more loose-fitting”.

I guess I’m kind of embarrassed to share that I’m intentionally losing weight, especially since many people would probably assume I’ve already got a handle on eating right given my profession. How do you handle these kinds of conversations?

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2GzTf5Q

Needing encouragement today

I am relatively new to the weight-loss process. I've been trying to lose weight for my entire adult life and have tried all sorts of diets. Low carb, 21 day fix, weight watchers, etc. Nothing has ever worked before so I just get frustrated and give up.

I am making an effort now, simply doing CICO. I have done the BMR calculator and gotten my appropriate deficit and macros amounts. I've been sticking with it for 37 days now (I know, it's not many) and really making what I feel is progress. I have struggled with binge eating my entire life and have been really making progress with breaking that habit. I haven't binged in over 3 weeks and I am proud of myself for that.

However, when I get on the scale, I don't see the results I want to see. I have been eating probably 3500 to 4000 calories in a day in the past, and I'm currently staying right around 2100 calories daily. My CW is 296, my SW was 299. I have been going to the gym and lifting 4 days a week along with walking on my off-gym days. Some days I feel like my clothes may be a little looser, but I'm really not sure.

I have gained 3 effing pounds since FRIDAY. I had half a piece of cake on Friday evening, and the other half on Sunday. I also had some boxed mac and cheese this weekend (1.5 cups). However, I have not gone over calories once all weekend. Yesterday was much better with no processed food and I was still up again this morning. Tried talking to a girl at my gym about it and got even more frustrated because I am so overwhelmed with what the right thing to do is. She said macros matter more than CICO, but I don't feel like that is entirely accurate for the weight loss stage I am at. Yes, for fine tuning it probably is vital to hit every number daily I would assume. But from everything I have read, CICO makes for weight loss.

Don't know if it matters, but I will be starting my period in less than a week and I know sometimes that can cause water retention. I am just SO mad and SO annoyed that I am trying very hard to eat good and go to the gym and do all the right things, but my body just says NOPE. Last week on Friday I was down to 293 and I was SO stoked. Now I'm back up to 296.8 and feel totally defeated and like I am fucking everything up.

Can anyone offer some wisdom? Because right now I am so aggravated and I just want to see some damn progress. I am so sick of being fat and want to know that there is at least a dim light at the end of the tunnel.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2NiXtPW

30 lb weight loss and snarky friend?

Long time lurker on this sub. I’m 19 years old, 5’5. My starting weight was 297 lbs. As of today I’m officially down 30 lbs, weighing 267! I’m really proud of myself for the effort I’ve made since last August. I’ve been doing the CICO method, ranging from ~1550 to ~1700 depending on the day. I fell off really hard Thanksgiving to December but got back on track after the holidays. I do full-body body weight exercises 3-4x a week, I walk all over campus, and I drink mostly water. I think the biggest contributing to my weight loss was honestly logging my food, even on really bad days. It took doing that a lot to see that “hey, I really don’t need to eat any of this shit, it’s not worth it”.

My main reason for posting though is because my roommate is my best friend and she’s recently noticed my weight loss and has been very rude/snarky towards me. Freshman year (2017-2018) we made a goal to get in shape together. That ultimately failed and after that I made the decision over the summer to do my own thing because I do better holding myself accountable.

I’ve already addressed her saying that I didn’t appreciate her comments (calling me fat, saying I’m ugly, stuff along those lines). I’ve told her that I would appreciate it if she could text me before bringing food/snacks for me so that she wouldn’t waste her money or get upset when I didn’t eat them. She didn’t stop doing either of them but both instances do happen less frequently.

I’m not obnoxious about the fact that I’m trying to lose weight, I don’t weigh myself when she’s in the room. I don’t scan my food around her and when we do eat (dining hall) I’m not all “oh I’m logging my food right now”. But she’s been going so far lately as looking at my phone at saying “Oh, you’re logging your food?” And then ignoring me.

Despite all this, I can’t help but feel like she’s holding a little resentment towards me and trying to sabotage me. I’m a handful of little comments away from telling her off and hurting her feelings (which I don’t want to do but it’s getting to that point). Typically, I’d just drop her BUT we live together and will be living together next year as well so I genuinely need to solve this issue.

I’m sorry if this doesn’t belong here, I talked to my mom about it and she said that “just don’t eat all the food that she brings” and “just ignore it”. My dad says I should just say fuck her and tell her off. I feel like those are both two extremes and I’d like to meet in the middle and have some outer perspectives from people who might’ve had a similar situation.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2IkAlBp

Relationships, Communication, and Weight Loss

How much support do you get from your SO regarding your weight loss/fitness goals and are you happy with that? Have you had to tell your SO to step off or step up? And how was that received?

My SO provides an amazing amount of support, but he sometimes "supports" in a way that comes off hurtful. I struggle often with telling him how I want to be supported without sounding like I'm either being contradictory or extremely picky about what he's "allowed" to say. (I never want to seem like I need to "grant him permission" to be honest with me.) His biggest problems and examples are below - but I'm curious about other couples where one or both individuals are in the process of losing weight, and how "support" is communicated (either effectively or ineffectively).

He's Too Honest Sometimes - I reached my lowest weight as an adult (about 10 lbs less than I weigh now). I made the mistake of telling him how this was the first time as an adult that I actually kind of felt comfortable in my own skin. I actually started to like how my body looked. In an attempt to provide "motivation", he basically told me I shouldn't be so content until I've reached my goal and that it wasn't good to "give up" so early. I was still 30 lbs from my final goal had no intention of giving up and I never said that I was - but him coming out with this speech at that particular moment made me feel like I didn't have the right to feel good because I still wasn't good enough. I get it if that's how he felt - and he has the right to feel how he feels, but it hurt bad.

He Ties Our Relationship Directly Into My Weight - He thinks he's being motivational when he talks about getting married when we've come closer to reaching our goals. In a way, this is a motivation because of course I want to kill it in a wedding dress; in another way, this makes me terrified for the day I might get pregnant or experience some medical problem and end up gaining a few again and suddenly I'm not a "good wife". Like the reading on the scale is directly relative to our quality of relationship.

He Thinks "Control" = "Help" - He bought us a package of strawberry mocchi for Valentines. It was understood we were splitting it. I assumed I could eat my 360 calories of mocchi whenever I wanted to since they were mine. Since Saturday was a high-cal day for me (I'm doing a 5/2 IF plan) and Sunday was not, I wanted to eat them when I had the room, but he gave me one and then put the package on the highest shelf of the closet where he knew I'd have trouble getting to them. When I complained, he said he was "just trying to help me savor them", but it felt like he was trying to control my intake. He also regularly buys treats for himself and then hides them from me - and writes his name on his leftovers even though it's just the two of us. He states this is to help me avoid temptation - but it really just feels like he thinks I'm some uncontrollable binge eater, when I'm not. I've had my moments, but never to the point where I steal someone else's food.

Apologies if this is not appropriate for this sub. Last time I posted something similar in the relationships sub, I was met with quite a few trolls, so I thought I would try here.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2V14ffI

After almost 2 months, I'm officially down 10 lbs today!

I officially have lost 8 lbs today. I started on January 2nd at 209.6, and today I'm 201.6. When I hit 10 lbs I'm going to slowly move to maintenance calories for a little while to give my body a break. I'll probably add 150 calories per week until my weight loss levels off. Then I'll go back to the deficit.

This is the first time in years I've been able to stick to a diet. I read about owning your diet 100% and ignoring that little voice inside that's always trying to sabotage your health.

I've also been using the LoseIt app, which I'm very happy with. It doesn't have as many options as MyFitnessPal, but it runs much smoother on my phone. I was at around 1,750 calories a day at the start, and now I'm at 1,684. I've been losing an average of a little over a lb a week. I'm not sticking to any specific types of foods (like a Keto diet or vegan). I'm eating protein bars for breakfast and lunch just because it's easy to track, along with some flavored coffee, and I'm eating more healthy nutritious foods for dinner.

For exercise, I'm playing very active VR games on Playstation VR, such as Beat Saber, Knockout League, and Sprint Vector. It's the first exercise I've enjoyed in the winter.

The Happy Scale app has also been a big help. It helps you see where your weight is trending, so even if you have a day where your weight shot up a pound or two, you'll know you're still losing weight overall. The app is only for apple products unfortunately. If you you're on Android, I recommend recording your weight every day, and averaging your weight every week to get a more realistic idea of where your weight is really at.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2IoCCMc

Is nobody noticing your weight loss?

In January of 2016 I hit my highest weight, almost 300lbs. I decided I needed to change, and over the past three years I'd lose weight on and off bringing me down 40 lbs overall into the 250's as of March last year. In 2018 I got married, went on my honeymoon, bought my first house and my second dog. It was a very happy year full of celebrating, and I gained most of the weight I had lost, roughly ~33lbs gained from March to December 2018.

The weight gain was upsetting to say the least, basically erasing three years of work. So one of my main goals in 2019 was to lose the weight for good. For the first time I wasn't relying on grueling gym sessions of weightlifting and cardio, but purely CICO, focusing only on what I ate. In the past 43 days I've lost 20 lbs and have some serious momentum going.

But why hadn't anyone noticed? I was curious, so I dug into my historic weight tracking (huge spreadsheet nerd) and realized for as long as I've been tracking my weight (and likely for a year and a half before I started recording), I have been in the same weight range.

https://imgur.com/a/ZUv6YmI

As I made that green overlay box, I realized that only one other time (my last weight loss effort last year) did I break below this weight range, and that was the first time people ever approached me to tell me they noticed my weight loss.

The takeaway here is, if you're anything like me and have been on a loooong journey of weight loss, don't get discouraged if people don't notice your weight loss. It may be that you've simply been in this weight range for so long that until you finally get below your 'normal range' people don't notice fluctuations as much.

Keep going, keep kicking ass.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2T6zJDG

Frustration with lack of support and knowledge from family

I (25f) have been on a weight loss journey for the past 6 years, and have made a significant amount of progress. I've backtracked a little, but am now firmly on track again. I take a slow and steady approach using CICO and IIFYM. I don't try to restrict myself from any one thing completely, but am very mindful about my choices and make sure to use moderation. So, I splurge on occasion, but make sure it fits into my budget first.

However, I am seriously frustrated with the comments and attitude coming from some family members. My MIL (who I love dearly), does not grasp a lot of the concepts of nutritional science, despite also trying to lose weight an be healthier. She makes comments to me about how I can't eat cheese if I want to lose weight or don't need to eat beans because they have carbs in them. In fact, she will tell my significant other not to give me certain foods, as if I cannot make those decisions myself. Then, 5 minutes later, she will encourage me to have a few beers or put sugar in my pot of chili. Seriously, sugar in my healthy meal-prep chili that I was supposed to eat this week! Now I don't feel comfortable eating it! She comes from a place of love, but her perspective on some nutritional concepts is seriously flawed, but she acts like I will never be successful if I don't do exactly what she says (despite already being 50 lbs down).

My own mother also makes fun of me in front of others for trying to make good choices. For example, during a family gathering, I had initially planned on not having room in my budget for a beer or two. But, I made a few different choices, and ended up having room for a beer. I thought to myself out loud "Yeah, I guess I could have a beer, it fits into my day now." And my mom laughed and said to everybody else "Isn't it funny how she has to give herself permission?" and trying to get everybody else to laugh at me too.

Individually, these occurrences are trivial. But they happen all the time. Not to mention, my MIL and mom are not afraid to tell me "You have love handles" or "You should be 140 lbs" or "You shouldn't weight lift, you should bike" and all other sorts of things. I feel like I am being sabotaged by the people who are going to turn around and give me a hard time if I don't succeed! I'm an emotional wreck today because I'm so frustrated with the cumulative occasions of this happening. I feel like my only choice is to keep my head down, keep trucking, and try to ignore everybody else. But I can't have this much emotional distress all the time either.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2NfHUZ1