(Rant) Weight loss making me losing out on dating

I've put rant in the title because this is genuinely just a post with me venting my frustration, there's probably not going to be any meaningful or inspirational message lol but I hope someone can relate.

I've always avoided dating in any form because of my insecurity in my appearance due to my weight, even when people have been interested in me despite my weight I've avoided it.

The worst thing is that right now there is someone who I reallyyy like, we get along great and she is just brilliant but I just can't tell her this because I know I couldn't support a relationship right now, I need to lose the weight but that will take months if not years.

She's going away to another country for the next 3 months, it'd be great to tell her how I feel but I just can't. Super frustrating and there's nobody I can explain this to and it just sucks.

Also for the record, this isn't like a dramatic "I'm so in love" lol it's really just a hint of a "I think there's something more here" feeling that I wish I could act on but I just can't.

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Family doesn’t understand calorie counting

I track my calories pretty much every day, I have ever since I lost around 28 pounds in the summer of 2017. I tracked pretty loosely until now as I was maintaining, now I’m looking to cut some fat so I’m doing tracking closely again.

I’m home for the summer and my dad just doesn’t get calorie counting. He is a great cook but he uses a ton of oil, which can really add up as we know. I love my dad but He never calorie counts and snacks, drinks, a lot.

Today he was making us butter chicken and he immediately threw a ton of oil onto a pan. I was like “hey I’ll make my own chicken in a separate pan” and he flipped out, being like “you’re getting crazy with this this isn’t sustainable”. He said it’s olive oil so it’s healthy. I just wish he understood that tracking calories is really the only surefire weight loss plan and he would be more accommodating to my lifestyle. I just offered to use another pan with way less oil, I didn’t say I didn’t want the dish.

So how do you deal with unsupportive relatives??

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DAE worry their weight loss isn’t real

Two months ago, I decided I couldn’t allow myself to continue my unhealthy relationship with food and lack of self care. Through a combination of things, I’ve lost 26lbs so far. I want to be happy it, but I have this overwhelming sense of dread that it’s all fake, that I’ll weigh myself and be back at my starting weight.

I know that is a pretty quick weight loss and some of it is water weight, but the number on the scale is going down with minimal fluctuation. I just feel like my progress is dissonant with basic things like CICO (I know weight loss is subject to many variables) and it makes me worried. I feel like I shouldn’t get too excited about it. Has anyone else felt like this?

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Sometimes you've got to take a step back

So, yesterday, I had an absolute mare. I went to the gym, was feeling pretty good about myself, and then came the dreaded trip to the supermarket where I loaded myself up with so much junk food I felt like the checkout machine itself was judging me. I was binging in my room, watching TV, stuffing my face full of so much sugar and carbs I honestly don't know how I'm still alive, and then my flatmate bangs on my door.

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Now, normally, once I've binged or failed a weight loss target, I'm out for the day. I feel like I've wasted time and I don't even want anyone to see me and my hideously bloated stomach. However, I decided to go out to the bar anyway. After all, what's the point in developing self-confidence if you can't practice it while you feel ugly and bloated as all hell?

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Luckily (and I don't fool myself here), while we were at the bar, a girl who's a friend of a friend who I've known a while decides to start talking to me and eventually she asks me out. Now, while the cocktail of nerves and sheer unadulterated terror was fantastic, another thought preoccupied me.

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If I hadn't taken a step back and decided that, even though I'd derailed my progress for one day, I didn't need to let that binge dictate my life and take my progress off-track, I wouldn't have gone to the bar, met the girl, and gotten a date.

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I don't expect this post to solve world hunger or any huge issue, I'd just like to express my discovery that sometimes the weight loss (and obsession with failing at it) can be more of an obstacle than it should be. Sometimes accepting that you've made a mistake and that it can be rectified later lets you live your life, and stops you from cutting yourself off from what is to come.

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Sticking with the long haul, losing weight longer than a year

I'm losing steadily through very sustainable CICO. It's going to take about 15 more months to reach my goal. I'm celebrating the small milestones on the way, but what other things help with impatience?

Previous attempts at weight loss have petered out from boredom, or feeling like I have the hang of it and could just "eat when I'm hungry", or letting one or two bad days derail me. I am pretty sure I have a handle on most of the things that stopped me from sticking with a plan until I get to my goal weight.

The one exception is just being done with tracking. So suggestions?

What worked for you in staying the course? What sounds good even if it didn't suit you? What was so weird you mocked it immediately, but probably isn't actually dangerous?

The other thing that I feel might hinder me is the feeling that because I failed before I can't. That one I know is silly, but it does give this feeling like it's inevitable to fall apart eventually.

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Intermittent fasting? Yay or nay?

Hey all, I’m fairly new here. I’ve been lurking and reading...and honestly this is probably one of the best weight loss groups I’ve ever seen. Kudos to you all!!

Anyways, I’ve been looking into intermittent fasting. Mainly because we just bought a house, and money is crazy tight, so eating a super healthy diet isn’t in the cards right now. But I have thought about doing keto because it honestly looks like a cheaper alternative....somewhat.

However!! I was wondering if the fasting would help now, until I can get my diet a little more under control. I am doing a lot more portion control...but maybe that would help further my progress.

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Undoing all my hard work during finals season

Hey guys, I'm currently finishing up my second year in college and finals season is a week away. I've lived on campus this year and the food on campus is in the form of dining halls that are buffet-style. This entire year has been a journey of me learning to control my eating and restrain myself when I could eat all the delicious and fattening foods and desserts at any time I want. It has been one of the hardest things I've ever done and it hasn't been a perfect journey. I haven't lost as much as i would like but i'm still incredibly loud of myself for losing at all this year. Last week I finally hit a small milestone in my weight loss and I was feeling like I was on top of the world. However, one part about being at school means that some weeks get incredibly stressful, especially midterms and finals weeks. This week and next are shaping up to be incredibly stressful with all my tests, and I’ve just been feeling burnt out in school and also in my eating. After studying for hours I just crack in the dining halls and just eat and eat and eat. Now my weight is inching back up and i’m undoing weeks of hard work and diligence because of it. This crappy feelings are really dragging me down and I’m just getting more and more frustrated as I keep gaining. Anyways, I don’t have any friends here that would understand how I’m feeling and I just wanted to get it all out. Thanks for being such a great community, I’ve gotten so much motivation here over the year.

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