I dont like discussing my weight loss efforts but if asked I'm honest and people are upset about it.

I've always been on the smaller side but depression and a lifestyle change has lead to me gaining a significant amount of weight in a very short amount of time. Because I'm Muslim and generally wear loose clothes that cover the majority of my body it isn't as noticeable as it would be on other individuals. But just because others can't see how my body has changed doesn't mean it hasn't.

I've been making an effort to eat healthier and track my calories. Some of my coworkers have noticed that I started bringing my own food for lunch instead of eating take out. I'm not eating most of the desserts that are brought in everyday. Small things like that. When they asked me about I of course told them the truth. I've gained weight and I'm trying to lose it. Should be simple enough. But I get a lot of "you're already skinny" "at this rate you'll develop an eating disorder" etc. None of this is true. Even at my smallest I never went below my recommended weight. And some of them even make it a point to mention how they are heavier than me like I'm personally offending them by trying to lose weight. Which makes me incredibly uncomfortable because I dont like comparing my body to others. I didn't always have the best self esteem and it took me a long time to feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm not trying to go back to that.

The whole situation gets under my skin and I'm not sure how to navigate it.

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One year of trying to lose weight, from 470 pounds to 285

Pics first since that's what I always look for first

Why I decided to start

About a year and a half ago I was able to go to Japan to teach English on the JET program. I came at about 485 pounds. Before I came I got emails asking me how big I was because people were afraid I wouldn't be able to fit in the doors here. Let me tell you, if you didn't have issues about your size before you will when you get questions like that. At my highest weight I was over 500 pounds, which is hard in America, but in Japan its completely different. Here I was touched by random people, most everyone asked me how much I weighed as soon as they met me and just overall did nothing to help with my self confidence.

About a year ago BTFC here on reddit started up. I always felt that since I was so large that if I joined it I would no doubt win. I joined it last year and... didn't win haha. But it kicked off my weight loss journey. I'm currently living in a very small town with no fast food which really helps me. It doesn't help that whenever I go out to another town I want to all the western food but I'm working on it.

What I did

I've done a lot of diets in my life like most any bigger person has. I did the HCG diet (500 calories a day and 'hcg' drops) and lost over 100 pounds. Then got depressed, went off of it (of course) and gained back it all with some friends. I have thought about weight loss surgery but I hate the idea of the side effects. Now I just watch what I eat. I aim for about 1500-2000 calories a day. Some days (some WEEKS honestly) I'm not close. I am addicted to food and its a daily struggle. Especially, like I said above, when I go to where I can eat western food. It's a comfort and I hate that.

I'm struggling to separate my feelings and my eating. Before I would eat for every emotion. Happy, sad, angry, bored, all of them just eat. Now I try to drink more water and think if I'm actually hungry or if its another reason.

I walk a lot. Much more now that winter is over at least. I really enjoy walking. I have done half marathons in the past when I was on my weight loss journey before and I love the feeling I get when I finish. I want to tour the US some time and do all of the rock'n'roll marathons. I really love the medals haha. I also joined kyoukushin karate here in Japan. The language barrier is tough but the teachers are so great to me and cheer on my weight loss. I love going in and seeing a teacher I haven't seen for a few weeks and they go "oh! slim! good!" It helps me to keep going.

What next?

I still have a long way to go. My first goal is 220 pounds. I honestly cannot remember the last time I weighed this much. I think even in high school I was 300 pounds or more. I honestly didn't weigh myself much back then. I am trying to be happy with myself. I know I have come a long way but all I see is a fat guy who has a long way to go and now has a lot of extra skin too. I really don't like the way my stomach looks and how its lopsided. I don't like a lot of things honestly. Some days I get really down and eat too much. I try to forgive myself for these days and remember that I am human. I didn't get to over 500 pounds by ALWAYS eating terribly and I won't get to 200 by ALWAYS eating perfectly. My goal is to make each day better than the last. Thank you for reading and if you have any questions I'd be happy to try to answer them for you.

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My goal weight seems so far away and sometimes I feel hopeless

I've come really far. My highest weight was 340 and I'm currently at 289. However a few months ago I was at 273 so I'm starting to feel a little discouraged. My doctor put me on phentermines to try and kickstart my weight loss journey again, I've lost 8 pounds since starting so I should be feeling more motivated yet I feel like nothing has changed and I have this irrational fear that just because the number is going down doesn't mean I'll ever slim down enough. The negative feelings are causing me to binge, granted I'm binging on healthy items but its still calories I dont need nonetheless. Has anyone else experienced that fear or the urge to binge? How did you overcome it?

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TW How an amazing body weight loss and diet community has changed me

Hi, so foremost i would like to say that English is not my first language, but I will be trying.

Okay, so I was overweight for every part of my teenage years, I weighted about 70-72 kg and I'm 160 cm. I was kinda fine, I mean at age 10-12 my boobs were definitely bigger than most girls, my mom is also like this so im guessing hormones? Yeah, but that made me go from very skinny little girl to bigger girl. I was always insecure, I hated PE, I was comparing myself to my friends who are still as lean as they always were.

And so, as any other person trying to lose weight I was going back and forth on so many diets I can't even begin to count how many there were, trying to exercise was always a struggle, cause I tried but I always failed on my 2nd day already. I was so tired, out of form. But it's not like I layed around on the couch and ate and just ate, nah i was very energetic child and a teenager, meeting with friends, never avoiding PE. But I'm not gonna blame anything else other than my love for food and love for just not doing anything....much lol

As I said I tried going on diets, one time during around the summer I switched to soy products mostly, that DID made me lose weight, a bit and clear my skin but after 2 months, I was back in with too much food. Then again nothing nothing, and i guess i just stopped dieting

THE IMPORTANT PART

I started just changing my eating habits around when i was 19 years old?? but mostly around 21-22 years old, cutting of sugar, cutting of soft drinks, juices, even diary cause lactose intolerant i guess, chips, sweets. I didn't weight myself for a LONG TIME, then i met a boy, he loves every inch of me lol, then we went for ski trip and the ski trip guy asked for my weight and i said 65kg cause thats a safe number, BUT when i actually weighted myself I was 58kg!!!! I was very happy, I actually then started seeing myself differently, like yes most of my clothes are much bigger than I actually am!

So I then I started the journey that kinda now destroyed me.

Exercising finally! Like 5 times a week? Yes, it was finally happening, I was taking care of my body, started looking more on what I put in my mouth. I didn't count calories at all, I was just intuitive eating and it did work on me, I weighted less and less, 54kg at the end of the 2018!

Then this year at the first half of the year, I had an accident, head trauma, very badly, that led me to mostly living in my bed for quite of time. I looked bad, my face was purple around the eyes. I hated how I look. I became also very obsessed with how i eat, how much, started calorie counting, started controlling my portions for less and less. I joined twitter community and started reading more of ED community tweets. Everyone noticed, and it became more apparent that I became something I never wanted to be.

I'm not going to tell you how much I lost, cause it wasn't much in terms of weight. I became super depresive, super over thinking about food, from the time i woke up to the time i went to sleep, I even tried working out but I yet can't.

It became something that truly ruined me, something I am much stressed about. I tried stopping, I tried become more old me, but right now I can't. Im very happy about my success, but I gained something that I'm afraid isn't gonna leave me for a while.

Thank you for reading!

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Extreme Hunger

Deleted earlier because I wasn't sure if this was in the right sub, since I'm not asking about weight loss, but it looks like there may be people here who have some experience this this.

Does anyone else, particularly (female) athletes, deal with constant, insatiable hunger? Like, you'll sit down for a meal with friends or pack a meal for lunch, trying to eat a normal amount of food, but you end up eating more than everyone else put together, yet still somehow feel ravenously hungry? For the past few years, I've been experiencing extreme hunger, where I'll eat more than twice as much as my 6 foot, 170 pound national level powerlifting boyfriend, and still go to bed unable to sleep because of how inexplicably hungry I am, even if my food is predominantly high protein, high fiber. I largely try to ignore this hunger because I don't think it's normal for anyone, especially a 5'3'' 115 pound girl, to be needing 5000+ calories a day, of largely nutrient dense food in order to stop feeling hungry. But it's been getting harder and harder to just ignore my hunger signals and it's pretty unsustainable to being a functional human being. And it's so frustrating being with a group of people who can just put their plates away after a normal amount of food, saying they're full and actually mean it. A regular meal honestly feels like a joke or an insult to my hunger. I can go to a restaurant, eat a full meal that makes a regular person completely stuffed and feel like I can eat the same thing three times over and still be hungry.

If you've experienced this, or have any kind of insight, I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Or if you happen to have knowledge of some literature on the subject, that would also be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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I’ve gone down three pants sizes!!

I (23F) started my weight loss journey at 178 pounds and at a US size 18 (I’m 4’11 btw). At the beginning I was barely fitting into my size 18’s, and I remember my mom struggling to zip me into my size 18 bridesmaid dress a couple months before I started losing.

It’s been almost 1 year since I’ve started, and I’m now 145 pounds, and today, for the first time since I was 19, I fit into a size 12 pair of jeans perfectly. I’d lost my motivation to keep going for a few months while I was at a temporary office job and didn’t get a whole lot of exercise in. Now that I have a retail job again, I’m back on my feet and constantly moving and the weight has been dropping steadily!

I’m so excited to get down to size 10. I never knew I was capable of pulling weight loss like this off!

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Moving past excuses and starting again.

I’ve been lurking for a while, but it’s taken me a long time to set my mind to really focus on weight loss and feeling like myself again.

I’ve been overweight most of my life, since childhood. I’m 32(f), 5’6 and the heaviest I ever weight as a teen was around 90 kgs/198 LB. A few years ago I managed to go down to 65 kilos/143LB, which on my frame was very slim and I wasn’t feeling the healthiest. I got aggressively into sports - I enjoyed it but it definitely was obsessive. I weighed my food, took multiple exercise classes and then got into weight lifting. I built muscle until I was 72 kgs/152LB- and I felt wonderful. I loved being strong and athletic, I loved and respected my body for once and felt at peace.

Over the past 3 years, I’ve completely lost all of my hard work. I still have some muscle, I naturally build and keep it quite well, but I’ve gained so much extra weight that I’m now pushing 95 kgs/210LB. I had an extremely toxic job and a lot of personal struggles, stopped working out and I fell back into emotional binge eating and I feel like I’ve woken up with all this extra weight and no memory of how I got here - or how I lost it in the first place. I have a closet full of clothes that don’t fit me, and I’ve failed at every attempt to go back to sports because of how alien my body feels and how slow and tired I am.

Today, I’ve decided to try again. Nothing works the way it did, my metabolism is a struggle and it’s exhausting to try again after so many attempts. But today I’m fed up, and determined. Any feedback or advice from anyone who had to dust off and try again would be appreciated - and any tips on kickstarting a metabolism that has been through a lot of self inflicted unkind behaviour. My biggest struggle is night bingeing, and I know I have to take ownership of this weakness. Thank you to all in this community, it’s been a wonderful resource!

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