Mental block - appreciating my 95 lb loss after yo-yo

4 years ago, I lost 150 lbs. I then regained 160. Devastating, as you can imagine. I have diagnosed binge eating disorder and thought I'd been treating it (counseling, meds), but I got in a shame spiral after I reached my weight goal and my disordered thinking was as bad as ever.

I've now lost 95. That rocks. But emotionally I don't even feel like I've accomplished anything. It is like my brain isn't even allowing me to be proud of myself. Sometimes I can recognize negative thoughts like, "Well, you're still 60 lbs over your lowest" and "Just making up lost ground," but most of the time I just feel nothing. Not mad at myself, but not proud of myself. Almost dissociated from the loss.

Intellectually, I am able to be very proud of myself and list off accomplishments. I went back into treatment. I surrounded myself with even more support (continued counseling instead of short term, 2x/week recovery meetings, better commitment to my meds and a psychiatrist instead of GP, fully accepting my eating disorder including the restrictive voice it has, more daily mental health practices). But I feel zero excitement over my weight loss.

It's not the first time I've yo-yo'd. I'd lost 50 and 85 in two prior weight loss attempts, then regained it and more. All three times I got into a certain weight range and then started regaining (um hello need to explore this in therapy... I am pretty sure that is the weight I was when I had a significant adolescent trauma). But I was able to still be excited for my progress each subsequent attempt. Maybe because I went "further" than my prior attempts in terms of total lost? Maybe I have more fear than I realize about history repeating itself?

Any suggestions for how I can emotionally drop my barricade and feel proud of myself, get in touch with the reality of the changes I've made? I'll talk to my therapist as well, but I'm between insurance for a few weeks so on a little hiatus from my regular appointments.

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Does anyone else stop visiting this Sub-Reddit when they go off the deep end with their weight loss?

Three and a half years ago I started this journey at 220 lbs in May 2016. I had gotten to 135 by December that same year, admittedly through some healthy ways and some not so healthy ways.

By Novemberr of 2017 I had been maintaining for a while at 130, I was happy and confident there. But then I met my boyfriend and I got happy and gained 30lbs by June of 2018 because I got lazy and I noticed while I was gaining the weight I stopped visiting here, maybe because it was me avoiding holding myself accountable or something.

I eventually got back down to 130 by like March/April of 2019, slower than I would have liked but I was so happy to be back at my goal weight. It didn't last long, by September this year I was at 155, and I once again noticed that I stopped visiting this Sub-Reddit while I was losing the weight again, just I just actively avoided it at all costs, a bit of shame and not holding myself accountable to my actions. As if I were to visit this Sub-Reddit it would make my situation of gaining back weight "real" to me.

Well I am back! I don't particularly comment or post but I used to lurk religiously. I'm currently 143 as of today and I am eager to back to my goal weight.

Hopefully this time I can keep it up, but I think so as later this month I'm moving so I can actually use a real kitchen without anxiety (due to my current living situation and some people I'm with).

Hopefully I can make good meals with my boyfriend, meal prep, and just hold myself accountable, I don't want to gain the weight back and I need to take the appropriate actions to lose and maintain healthily. Probably should go see a dietician or therapist to help with my binging problems.

This post is longer than I expected, but I was just curious if others did the same when they gained weight back .

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Weight loss with limitations?

Hi guys, I'm a new follower to this sub but man do I have a situation. You'll need a bit of my health backstory. I was super skinny for years and years. I had to gain weight to stabilize my very low blood pressure, and then I was put on antipsychotics and gained thirty pounds in a month. I have PCOS, and therefore an insulin resistance. I also have hashimotos, and am still on antipsychotics that slow the metabolism. After a struggle with a miscarriage, I worked hard and lost 30 pounds (from 190 to 157) before getting pregnant through IVF with my son. I went to the gym 4-5 days a week, and found I really love working out, as it's also very good for my mental health. Baby was born, I had complications. I had seven surgeries over the summer to resolve them. Before pregnancy, I had fatigue and joint pain and muscle weakness, but post pregnancy it got worse. Way, way worse. There's now visible joint damage to my bones in x-rays. It's looking like sero-negative rheumatoid arthritis, although an official diagnosis is still pending. I'm back into the 180s. I keep trying to re-institute an exercise routine but my body fatigues so quickly and I have a ton of inflammation and pain. I can barely care for my baby most days, and had to hire help due to excessive pain. I'm trying to get my diet back under control, but with all my metabolic issues I really struggle just maintaining my weight when I can't include a hefty exercise routine. Worse, the last problem. I'm on so many medications for my health problems that I often feel very nauseous. I need to eat every couple hours to not feel very sick, and usually something more carb based to settle everything. I am recording calories and starting to cut sugar and carbs, but after three months of a calorie "deficit" I gained three more pounds. I'm feeling hopeless and I know my medical problems will make it harder but I don't know what to change next to make this happen.

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Weight loss calculators keep recommending me 800 calories a day to lose 2 lbs a week?

Hey all, I'm wrapping up my first week of CICO and it's worked out great so far, lost 4 lbs since I started! I know that the first week is just going to be a lot of water weight and stuff, and I can expect a slower but steady weight loss trend from now on if I keep it up. I'm trying to shoot for losing 2 lbs a week and have been pretty good about keeping my intake to around 1200 calories a day and just doing some yoga every other day. This is what I have done in the past and has worked for me before.

Today though I tried out some TDEE calculators and set it for weight loss, and many of them gave me a ~800 daily calorie intake to lose 2 lbs a week. Obviously I'm not going to listen to that and plan on sticking to 1200, but is it just impossible for me to lose 2 lbs/week at a healthy rate? I thought 1200 would basically guarantee that.

My stats are F 23, 5'8" and currently 157 lbs, trying to get down to 145 lbs.

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Quick share!

It's my(23F, 5'6) first time posting here- just wanted to share my joy and hopefully motivate a few people at the same time! I don't have a set goal weight, but I would like to end up somewhere around 130 if possible.

Growing up, I was a figure skater and easily kept my weight close to 120lbs while eating absolute crap. I had to quit skating in my mid teens due to knee injuries, and I admittedly fell into quite the depression at the same time because it was my passion and I had to pull out. This manifested in a quick weight gain, and by grad only a couple years later I was about 190lbs and absolutely uncomfortable, but also unwilling to acknowledge or do anything about it. To be fair, I was struggling a lot with my knees still. I'm now 3 surgeries in, with more to come as 'maintenance' when I eventually need them.

3 years ago almost exactly, I went vegan(that's another story, but the switch was never about weight. Moreso a combination of realizing what I was eating, and ethics). I stayed close to my original weight for the first 2 years, though I did notice other changes like my skin clearing up and less digestive issues. I ate a lot of 'vegan junk food's like fake chicken strips and pasta, because that's what I knew how to cook. Then, last October, I switched positions at work to one that requires a ton of lifting and I now put in about 25,000 steps a day on average. I slowly started losing weight then, which has motivated me to continue!

Since then, I've tried to make more whole food swaps, eat a little cleaner, pack my lunches, etc. This summer, I started practicing yoga. After adding that in, I'm proud to say that today I'm down to 155 lbs... 155! I haven't seen that since about grade 9, and while it isn't by any means the biggest loss or greatest weight loss journey that I've seen posted here, I am so proud of myself for doing better. I feel better, I have more energy, and I naturally eat better because I know that I feel better when I do! My knees bother me a little less, probably a mix of having less weight on and the strength coming back with yoga. I can tell that I am in better shape, I can feel and see my muscle tone. I'm excited to see what else I can do!

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ADVICE NEEDED: hit a plateau very early in my journey. How do I keep losing?

Hello, I recently started my weight-loss journey on October 18th, I started seriously looking at my calories and macros, as well as walking 2 miles at least 4 times a week. At first, the weight came off quickly, I lost 7 pounds within 10 days. I did not change any habits, and I have continued with the same eating pattern(around 1300 calories a day, no more than 90grams of carbs) and my two miles, 4x a week. The other 3 days, I work a very active job and burn around 900 calories, but my weight loss has stopped within the last week. The scale has not budged. What can I do to get it moving again?

Stats: 21/F/SW:273/CW:266

Thank you in advance for any recommendations. If any more info is needed, let me know.

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I finally saw it myself.

I'm on mobile and English isn't my native language, so you know the deal. Sorry for any mistakes.

TL:DR at the bottom for those who can't be bothered.

First off some info. Height: 6'5", SW: 290lbs, CW: 238lbs, GW: 200ish.

I started my weight loss journey back in may and at that time I was around 290lbs. I started due to me having hypermobile joints and kidney issues. Losing weight can help both those things. I also quit candy and other stuff cold turkey, which has gone surprisingly well. I don't count calories, but I just slightly keep track in my head.

So I started working out 4 days a week and I'm doing about 50/50 cardio and weights. I fucking hate it because my joints hurt and I haven't felt like I've been making any progress. But hey you gotta do it anyways is kind of my mindset.

I have been losing weight pretty consistently, but I haven't really noticed any changes to my body. It really made it hard to stay motivated. I mean I knew that I've been getting slimmer. My family and friends say so and I've gone down 3 belt sizes and I'm using old clothes that didn't fit me, but I still couldn't really see it for myself.

Today it happened my dudes. As I was getting into the shower I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I noticed I was considerably thinner than what I imagined myself to be and I noticed some actual muscle in my arms.

I've been riding this high all day. Very pleased with these turn of events.

Really no point to this, but I felt the need to share this somewhere.

TL:DR less fat now, finally noticed it. Happy camper.

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