I went too far trying to lose weight and now I don’t know what to do

Throwaway account here, I apologize in advance if I don’t make much sense as I’m just kind of ranting off of emotions

I (M21) (5’8 in height) lost ~60 lbs (210lbs to 150lbs) around 2-3 years ago. I had been overweight all of my life up until that point. I was probably the happiest I’d ever been at the time, for the first time in my life I was considered a normal weight and I had more confidence, people began to treat me kinder, and I would get lots of compliments on my weight loss from people who knew me beforehand.

However, despite having lost so much weight, I found myself in a position of being skinny fat. Despite doing weight training at the time, once I hit my goal weight of 150 I still had noticeable man boobs (which I know isn’t gyno) and a good amount of belly fat. This took a huge toll on my already fragile self esteem, and things stayed this way for a while. I ended up maintaining this up until a few months ago, where I decided I’d had enough and went 3 months eating 1200-1500 calories.

My goal here was to finally, at the very least, get rid of my man boobs once and for all and finally be normal and have a flat chest and belly like all of my friends who are around the same height and weight. By the end of the 3 months I ended up at 131 lbs, but much to my dismay my torso barely looked any different and all I was left with were skinny arms that had lost any muscle they once had.

I had maintained this weight for about a month, largely thanks to a newfound obsession with calories. I would constantly think about food, immediately after eating my first thought would be “what will I eat later? can it fit in my calorie budget?” etc etc

Until suddenly my habits just shifted. I think the stress my schoolwork in college piled on top of my existing stress with food, my body refusing to lose fat, etc, and I began emotional eating. The current college semester began and for the past month I’ve been eating out constantly with friends, and if not that, I’m binging on a huge box of oreos that the local dollar store sells. I think I went to far and now I’m “yo-yo”ing. In the past month I’ve gone from 131 lbs to 140 and now I’m terrified I’ll eat myself back into being overweight and I’m not sure how to stop gaining and repair my relationship with food.

I just want to be normal and eat what I want when I want, be confident in my own body, and not have food on my mind 24/7. I just felt the need to rant here because I really don’t know what to do.

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203lbs -> 155lbs (CW) What I learned

This advice is not novel and entirely anecdotal. It is simply what helped me. I hope it helps even just one person.

1. Start slow and small. If you try to adopt some insanely elaborate lifestyle on Day 1, you will not stick to it. Think of it like weightlifting or really anything in life that requires improvement. If you wanted to become jacked, you wouldn't walk into the gym day 1 and try to bench 500lbs. First of all, you cant and second its entirely pointless. Instead, you'd start at (for sake of example) 100 lbs. Next week you'd go to 105. Then, 110... etc. Same with weight loss. Yesterday you drank 5 sodas? Ok, drink 4 today. Iterative improvements are key to success in the long term.
2. Don't try to be perfect. You are going to mess up. You're going to overeat or overdrink. If you try to be perfect, then this failure may derail you, which would set you back a ton. Instead, when you mess up, just wake up the next day and say, "What can I do today to make what I did yesterday not as painful?" Boom, you're back on track. And yes, it is okay if you mess up 6/7 days your first week. Go for only messing up 5/7 days the following week, and so on. The iterative improvement applies here.
3. Eat what you like. This relates to point 1. If you condemn yourself to a strict diet of raw vegetables, and you don't like raw vegetables, then you will fail. You can eat what you like, just eat less of it. It really is that simple! Of course, actually doing that isn't simple and I'm not trying to diminish the effort necessary to do so. But, enjoying the foods you like while reducing quantity has been key in my success.
4. Determine exactly WHY you want to do this. Since you're here, you obviously want to lose weight. But pinpointing a reason (or a few) down to an exact sentence is incredibly valuable. You can use this as a sort of mantra and remind yourself why you're on this journey.
5. Replace your food addiction with healthy habits. When dealing with addiction, it is nearly impossible if you do not find things to occupy yourself with. Busy mind is a distracted mind. Distracted mind is a mind that is not craving food. These healthy habits can be anything, by the way! It does not have to be a physically active one, or anything. It only has to be something you truly enjoy doing.
6. "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't - you're right." - Henry Ford. This quote is so unbelievably true. If you're reading this, that means there is a part of you that believes you can achieve this. Even if it is tiny. Cling to it like your life depends on it and believe in yourself.
7. Don't expect immediate results. Maybe it is social media, or our shortened attention spans, but I constantly see the old, "Lose 10 pounds in a month" or "Get abs in a week." It's all crap. All of it. I'm not saying it is dishonest (although it probably is), but rather it is entirely irrelevant to your journey. See how long it takes you to reach your goals and don't worry if others are faster or slower. Just focus on the goal and the path to get there.
8. Start loving yourself now. The act of committing to a new lifestyle to improve your health (or whatever the reason is) is evidence of you loving yourself and wanting to take care of yourself. You will not magically love yourself once you lose the weight. But, loving yourself will definitely help you to lose it.
9. Extreme ownership is so valuable. Own your weight and all the reasons behind it. There is absolutely no doubt in the world that some (maybe all) of the reasons are not your fault. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter. You have to own it and own it all. Otherwise you'll just keep blaming other things (and likely rightfully so) instead of focusing on achieving your goals.
10. A person who is not supporting you is not your friend. This includes potentially enabling your food addiction. If you share your goals and what you're trying to do with people, you will be able to tell immediately if they are your friend. If they laugh and say, "You'll never do that", well they are not your friend. Drop them and use their doubt to fuel your motivation to achieve your goals.

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A near 0 calorie solution to satisfy your sweet tooth with no artificial sweeteners

I know everyone's got their own unique weaknesses when it comes to weight loss, but mine has always been sugary beverages and the need for something sweet in the evenings. It ended up adding upwards of 500 calories to my diet. For me it was about something tasty to look forward to throughout the day while I worked. And so of course I had my noonish cup of coffee with cream and sugar + something sweet before bed.

After noticing the scale tick up though I figured I'd better find a strategic way to deal with this weakness of mine. I tried to replace these items with scented carbonated water and it helped a little, but not much. So I tried Drift drinks (carbonated water plus citric acid and a little fruit puree) and though they had a few calories (4-10) it didn't really satisfy the cravings either.

That's when I remember as a kid my dad used to grow these shrubs from the African Sahel that produced a small fruit that temporarily modified your taste buds to perceive sour and tart flavors as sweet instead. I'd use it as a party trick back in Highschool and college by giving the berry to friends then have them bite into a raw lemon (it would be deliciously sweet like lemonade.) The downside was back then the only place that I could get the berry was from my dad's 4 foot tall shrub, and it only produced a few hundred berries a year. I was so enamored with them that I did my undergraduate chemistry thesis on them.

Anyway, 20 years later a few places in Miami are producing the berry and freeze drying it for sale. I tried a few of them with Drifts, and I was gobsmacked by how effective the combination was. So for instance, one berry + a mango/orange drift of 8 calories tasted like Mango Lase. One Berry + raspberry limeade of 4 calories tasted like super sweet raspberry limeade. It was like drinking a soda minus the calories and sugar crash.

Now in the afternoon and evening I just sub out my calorically heavy treat for a 4 calorie or 8 calorie drink, and my craving for sweets is satisfied.

The only downside (or upside?) is that within 30-60 minutes or coating your taste buds with the berry it makes EVERYTHING with a tart or sour taste sweet. So for instance, ketchup, sour cream, plain yogurt, pickles, etc.

The other downside is that the berries are somewhat expensive. A drift + 1 berry will end up coming out to about $2, and if you are burning through 4 a day, it gets expensive (worth the weight loss for me, though.)

Anyway, if you want to try it out, they are for sale a few places. Just go to Amazon and Google Miracle Berries or Miracle Fruit (what I called them as a kid). The freeze dried ones work best.

And remember, the active protein needs to coat your taste buds to work, so you can't just swallow them (instead you swish them around in your mouth so they coat your whole mouth for about 30 seconds).

Anyway, just thought I'd share this interesting factoid. It's helped me with weight loss a lot and allowed me to cutout most of the added sugar in my diet.

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290Lbs, Weight Loss Question, Male

I'm currently on my own weight-loss journey and I was wondering if this looks like a feasible diet for losing weight and adjusting to a better "life-style" in general.

Diet

Current Height: 6' 1" Current Weight: 290.5 Lbs Daily Calorie Intake: 2,451 Calories Daily Protein Intake: 251.8 Grams 

Workout

Strength Training: 4 Days / Week Cardio/Boxing: 30-45 Minutes 2 Days / Week 1 Rest Day [Sunday] 

​

I have a WFH job, so I have lowered the calorie intake from the recommended 2700-3000 calories, to 2,451, because I will not be as mobile during the work day.

I understand "lose skin" will be inevitable, but I would like to minimize it as much as possible, so please leave tips and suggestions for that as well.

Thank you! 🙂

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Losing fat everywhere except for my belly

So I’m in a weight loss journey rn, I was never overweight but I was on my way there. I gained 60 pounds I went from 120 at 5’8 to 180 in 3 years ago, I even became pre-diabetic.

So far since March I was able to lose 35 lbs, went down to 145 and I noticed that fat started to go away from my face, then my thighs and ass, I went a size down and now I’m able to see my ribcage but I still do have fat belly in comparison to the rest of my body and I’m not sure how much more weight I should lose and I don’t wanna go back to being 120lbs because at the time I thought I was too skinny.

What would be the best way to lose belly fat? Should I just continue on losing weight and hope it’s going to disappear once I reach a certain weight?

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When did the excessive sweating stop on your weight loss journey?

I’ve been on my weight loss journey for two months now and I’ve lost about 20 pounds or so. I’m a 5’11 male and I used to weight around 270 and now I’m 251. Being sweaty all the time was probably one of the worst parts about being overweight for me. It caused me to have a lot of social anxiety because the moment the slightest bit of heat touched my face, sweat would start dripping all over my face. If I was a heavy sweater on my body/pits I probably wouldn’t mind as much. But sweating constantly on my face is so annoying especially in the workplace or social events. I avoided any events that I knew wouldn’t be in a cool setting.

I noticed that I lost fat all around my body except my belly/man boob area. I still have a pretty big gut which will probably be last to go. I’m assuming all the extra body fat around my upper body is still causing a lot of insulation which is making me sweat more.

So when did y’all notice the sweating caused by excessive weight stop? I’m hoping by the time I get to 200-220 it gets better. Please share your experiences!

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Early morning workouts and weight loss

Starting to train before work, around 5:30am. If you’ve done this how have you sustained it whilst trying to loose weight? Any tips and tricks?

Do you eat before, snack before it or go in fasted with pre workout?

How has it affected you during the day after a workout?

Have you noticed any difference from training early AM to evening whilst cutting?

Potentially looking at doing weight training in the morning then cardio in the evening after work!

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