Day 528 ish

I'm back again. Still working on losing the weight. My last post was a very honest look into my journey, my struggles, and the work I did to heal from that.

F/5'10 SW 285 CW 245

So day 528. Man, looking back, I thought I'd be done by now. I thought that the last time was the last time and I would be successful. After my plateau led to binging and fasting in May, I decided to use the summer to get my mental health back on track.

I started doing walk/runs to get more sunshine and more activity. This led to me jogging my first very slow 5k, even got a very cute participation medal from it!

I completely stopped tracking calories and shifted my internal dialogue away from food, weight loss, anything body related. This brought me out of the binging cycle I had gotten myself into.

I stopped the negative self talk and started replacing it with gratitude.

All of this took all summer, and I gained about 5lbs back in the process leading to be being back in the 250s which was disappointing but expected.

A few weeks ago, I started the loosely following the mayo clinic diet, mainly their suggestions on servings for carbs, fats, proteins, fruits and veggies. I also cut out sugar and diet soda almost completely (hard to do since sugar has creeped into every product imaginable)

This has really helped me reframe my thought process towards meals, working to have balanced meals and at least 5 servings of fruits and veggies every day. I really needed this kind of framework for that initial push to eat vegetables regularly, I never knew before how to eat the perfect amount with the perfect variety to get the perfect mix of vitamins and minerals and fiber so I just didn't even try.

Now I have carrots almost every day, bell peppers, brussel sprouts, romaine and spinach are my staples and I've been trying to add one new vegetable each week to expand my horizons. This week is radishes, not bad!

I started going back to the gym for weight lifting since my running days are limited by the cold and by the fact that I hate running in general haha! I hit 100lbs on the bench press this week, very very stoked for that as it has been a goal of mine for years.

All this to say, I'm still working on it, building my habits slowly and surely and figuring out how to make these changes doable for years and years in many different circumstances. For all you others out there who keep failing and getting back up again and again and again, determined to do better and be better, I'm with ya and we'll get there.

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When people notice my weight loss I start binging again! Why??

I live abroad and my family is back home, we don’t see each other for long stretches of time. They never really say much if I’ve gained but when I lose weight, oh boy, EVERYBODY and their mother tell me about it, they say I’ve lost weight, that I look great they ask me what I did and act interested.

They know it’s what I want and they’re being nice about it and it does make me feel good but it completely takes away my motivation to continue, I start binging again for some reason, like this validation was my goal, and it’s not!

I have thought about my goals and typed them out and their validation is not one of my reasons why.

I just don’t get it!! Does that happen to anyone else?

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Starting all over after reaching 291 lbs and being body shamed in public

Hi, y'all. I use to be active here on another account in 2017-2018. So I've been overweight since I was 10. My weight constantly fluctuated. I ate myself to death because of trauma.

I started my weight loss journey in 2017 and went from 258 to 243, I had kept the weight off for a bit. Then in late 2019 a lot of bad things had started happening. I got up to 275 in 2020 and now 291 in 2021.

Right now, I'm down to 279 (5'6, female, 20 years old). I was out a couple of days ago and a man and woman were laughing about my weight, specifically my thighs. I looked at my old weight loss pics vs now and I didn't notice how my thighs are now.

My face is bloated horribly. I went from being told I was 15/16 at 18 to looking like a 25-30yr old at 20... My thighs are so large they legit bulge out where I can't where skinny jeans or it looks horrifying.

I'm started all over today. No more junk or restaurant. I was eating restaurant every day for year. I'm starting my walks again and just fruits and vegetables. I can't believe how bad I let myself go.

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Finally 59.3kg this morning (lost 2 lbs over about 1 week)

I was 50.7kg last year. Over the past 1 year, I gained weight up to 60kg. It'd be nice to lose weight up to 50kg again, but it was too difficult to maintain even though I'm pretty short. So, my new goal is 55kg, 121 lbs. I'm 5'6'', so it's not as good as competitive athletes (elite boxers who do good who are the same height as me are about 53kg), but it's the best I can do.

This weight loss isn't as fast as I am hoping to get this done. My weight has been keep fluctuating (going down then going back up) mostly because I like to eat, and it is really hard to stay away from food. (Food is entertainment here.)

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/weight-loss/in-depth/weight-loss/art-20047752

But do you really know what's realistic? Over the long term, it's smart to aim for losing 1 to 2 pounds (0.5 to 1 kilogram) a week. Generally to lose 1 to 2 pounds a week, you need to burn 500 to 1,000 calories more than you consume each day, through a lower calorie diet and regular physical activity.

According to Mayoclinic, this seems realistic though. I am eating 3 times a day (not doing intermittent fasting anymore), eating 60g protein everyday, lifting bodyweight for 10 minutes in the morning, walking around at fast pace for about 2 hours everyday (400 Calories burned with walking). I am hoping to eat less though. I want to eat only 2 times a day. I couldn't make it today, but hopefully I will be able to pull it off tomorrow. I am drinking a lot of decaf coffee with artificial sweetener and skimmed milk.

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I am officially classified as NORMAL WEIGHT!!!

I can't believe this!

I'm 5'6F and as of today, I weigh 149 lbs! This really made my day!

I've always struggled with my weight. When I graduated school (2 years ago), I moved back home and was 180 lbs. That was the heaviest I had ever been. I felt gross! I felt unhappy and unattractive. I know people always say that you can find clothes (or a size) to match your weight, but to be honest, when you are really overweight, clothes don't look good. I avoided going to dinner parties or invitations to social events for this reason. I couldn't even fit into my mom's clothes. I would get tired walking up the stairs and I decided I couldn't continue living like this.

I always had an unhealthy relationship with food, particularly with dessert. I'd resort to comfort eating any time I felt depressed, stressed, sad, etc.

I officially began my weight loss journey in February of this year. It's taken 7-8 months to lose 30 lbs. I made small changes such as cutting out sweets, measuring out my portions, and walked outside during the warmer months. MOST of my old clothes fit me now!

My goal weight is 120-125 lbs. Winter has always been a tough season for me so I decided in the mornings I will brave the cold and walk outside - with layers, a heavy coat, hat, gloves, etc. and be really disciplined with calorie counting. My next goal is to lose 10-15 lbs by March. It does get harder to lose weight as you get smaller, but, I'm not giving up! I know this time next year I will look like and feel like a different person!

Just thought whoever is reading this, that my story will give you some inspiration! No matter what it is that you're facing, you can do anything you set your mind to. Please don't let anyone tell you otherwise. It doesn't matter where you start. All it takes is (literally) that first step.

You can do it!

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Staying motivated and overcoming fear in second weight journey

( Obligatory disclaimer: I, now, do understand weight loss is 90% calorie deficit and 10% exercise. )

TL;DR — Lost 70kg / 154lb three years ago. Gained them back. Starting again. Afraid the body is "rejecting" to lose weight. Losing the motivation.

Four years ago this week I was weighing 165kg / 364lbs, and I decided I've had enough. I checked into a CrossFit box and a dietist, and over the following 12 months I lost 70kg / 154lbs. I arrived at 95kg / 209lbs and life was great again — I could basically do everything. Even if I couldn't do some more extreme stuff I saw other people doing, just being able to sit on a chair without the fear of it breaking was awesome. Freedom. Problem is I wasn't really counting calories, and I didn't really understand how weight loss worked. I just followed a dietary plan too strictly, and exercised like crazy 7 days a week. I also didn't think of it as a lifestyle change, but as a one-year journey. Still, it seemed to be working.

During the following 12 months I got overconfident in my weight loss abilities. I gained 10kg / 22lbs back. I still wanted to lose more, so I started to get a little frustrated. I started to go less frequently to the CrossFit box — it seemed to not be working after all — and especially I started indulging again. Then COVID struck, as well as a divorce and some other personal and work issues, and I basically let myself go and welcomed back almost all the weight I had lost. Back to 160kg / 353lbs.

About a month ago I decided again I've had enough. I want to get back to those sweet 95kg, or close to them. I checked into the dietist once again, and since don't have the time to go to the gym or the CrossFit box I decided to build an home gym — I got an assault bike, a squat stand, barbell and weights. With the home gym up and running, for the past 5 weeks I've been exercising 5 days a week and tracking calories in MyFitnessPal. My calorie intake is between 1500cal and 1750cal every day.

During these 5 weeks I lost 8kg, which sounds good. However, this last week was particularly challenging:

• Mid-week I gained one kilogram out of nowhere (probably water retention, but still);
• The weight seems to be oscillating and stuck between 151kg and 152kg for the past three days;
• I don't have cravings, but my brain is constantly asking me for more food (bigger amounts).

Now I am probably over-reacting, I'll accept that, but I am afraid that because I did the same journey in the past, my body might have somehow gotten used to caloric deficit and exercise and is now refusing to let go of the freaking weight this time around. Is that even a thing? How do I keep motivated seeing the progress stalling and knowing that I love to eat and hate exercising?

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Periods much more painful after losing weight?

When I was younger and slimmer (size 8), I had very painful cramps with every period (5-6 days), would have to take painkillers and then still end up lying on the floor all day. Gained weight at 18 (about 30kg) and my periods became much more infrequent, I could no longer track when they would be coming because they became so unpredictable, and the flow lasted for maybe 2-3 days. I also really didn't get cramps anymore, didn't need painkillers.

Now I'm losing weight again (about 15kg left to go) and my periods are really starting to affect me again. I've taken painkillers and I can still barely move today, and they seem more regular. Is this just part and parcel of weight gain? Is it something to worry about? In my country you don't see a gynae until you're about 30, unless you have a particular problem. I had the recommended smear test at 25 and that was normal. This is a weight loss side effect I hadn't even imagined and it sucks. I used to think that my periods were less painful because I was entering my 20s and they'd settled down, now I think it was purely because I gained weight. I don't want to try birth control for a multitude of reasons, one being that I've heard they cause weight gain.

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