Friday, May 26, 2023

Visualizing the Weight I’ve Lost as Extra Luggage

23F 5’8” SW: 210.0 lbs CW: 163.0 lbs

I’m traveling back home today to see my family for the first time since last October, and the last time they saw me I was right at 200 lbs. One of my goals has been to get to a healthy BMI in time for this trip, and as of this morning my BMI was 24.8. I know it’s an arbitrary bench-marker, but I’m proud of going from obese to “healthy” over the past six months.

I knew I had hit my goal, but the most surreal moment of all came when I was packing my suitcase. Since I don’t have one of those luggage weighing tools, I have to resort to holding my bag on the scale to make sure that I’m not over the 40 lbs weight limit. And when I stood on the scale, holding my completely stuffed suitcase, I looked down and saw the number 196 lbs.

I weigh less today, while holding my suitcase, than I did this time six months ago. That suitcase is heavy - I’m an efficient packer - it caused some strain for my back and arms carrying it around. I used to carry more than that around with me every single day…

Visualizing my weight loss like that was just really surreal for me…

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Brain fog - different diets

So it's time to do something about my weight and I have been looking all over gathering information what would be, for me, a good approach.

Inevitably I was reading up on keto and it took my attention that many (most) people say that keto helped tremendously with their mental clarity.

Short: I want that!

However I'm sceptic (about most things) and I'm wondering if it's really keto(sis) that brings the mental clarity or is it the lack of crappy food that comes with switching to keto?

The other side of the coin, in what ways would a cico contribute to brain health? I would think that, also the lack of crappy food, would help the brain?

It's not my intention to create (another) x is better than y because abc. I'm genuinely interested by this and hope to use that to my own benefit when starting my weight loss journey.

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I'm so irritated at my scale at home. I don't think it's giving me an accurate reading.

To give context, I'm a 26M, SW: 379.8, CW: 343.6 (I think) that has been doing weight loss for almost 5 months now. My doctor has recommended a strict 1,600 calorie allowance for a calorie deficit and it was going well up until recently.

I'm very irritated and frustrated at my scale as of lately. Since last week, I have been worried that I was reaching a plateau (and part of me still is worried I'm getting close to one).

I weighed in at 344.0 on Friday of last week, the same weight as the week prior. I thought I was reaching a plateau as I have been counting calories and haven't been surpassing my daily allowance. The next day, I weigh myself and it says I'm at 340 pounds. I believed that is the accurate weight, but then I started to have trust issues with my scale.

This morning, I woke up and weighed myself. This time, I decided to experiment and try with different places in my house. I only counted times when the weight showed up twice. First the bathroom. It gave me readings as low as 327.0 and as high as 347.8 pounds. Then, I weighed in the kitchen. It gave me 343.6 and 346.0 pounds. This isn't even the times my scale wouldn't even measure correctly and

I'm so frustrated with my readings lately. I'm not sure what the problem is. Is it that the trailer I'm currently living in is unlevel in some areas? Do I have poor balance that could be affecting the scales? Is my scale not a good and accurate one? I'm not entirely sure, but I'm feeling irritated, frustrated, upset, and a lot more because I feel I'm slowing down if not halting the progress I've made.

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Thursday, May 25, 2023

I don’t know what to do anymore at this point

I don’t know if this is the right forum for this but yall I’m so tired. Like, extremely tired of this whole weight loss process.

I have been at it for Years on Years and I would lose a little bit, self sabotage, then gain it back. I’m about 5’3 235 lbs. The highest I’ve ever been.

I have no motivation right now to lose weight. Like I want to, but I am just like “ I’m going to fail again I’m tired of this shit”

Ive probably spent thousands by this point on trainers, workout programs, food im not going to eat, and gyms i am not going to. Like wtf am I to do at this point?! I see everyone else getting it and succeeding and i feel like all I keep doing is failing at this shit. It fucks with my self esteem.

I want to lose weight, I really do. But I’m not doing anything gimicky. Nothing that don’t change my lifestyle. I’m damn sure don’t want to go to a gym where I’m doing crazy workouts that have me anxious to even go back and repeat.

Losing weight should not be this hard. What am i missing? What should I try to create lasting change? I’m on the verge of wls at this point.

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40 pounds of progress, definitely starting to notice a difference in how I look and feel!

https://imgur.com/a/QjJk9Uu

My highest weight was 265 lbs, the first picture was in March 2022. By March 2023 I was only down to 255 so I really finally buckled down. I cut back to 1500 calories per day (it was extreme at first but now it’s actually around my recommended caloric intake for a 2 pound/week weight loss, which is about what I’ve evened out at). I’m 5’8”. I started by walking daily, and have increased to adding a weekly routine of at-home strength training I’ve created and increase as my body allows. Also and possibly most importantly I’ve given up drinking alcohol entirely. I’ve gotten down to 223 lbs since March and I’m definitely noticing a difference in how I’m looking and feeling! When I put my hands on my hips I notice more of a dip in the waist area where there used to be more fat. I used to have sleep apnea but now I no longer wake up gasping or require a CPAP when I sleep on my back. My chronic back pain has significantly decreased (probably as much from the increased physical activity and stretching as from the weight loss). My old clothes fit me much better and I can buy ever-so-slightly smaller sizes (XL instead of 2X, the smallest sizes in plus sized stores, etc). I still have a long way to go to reach my goal of 160 lbs, but it’s definitely encouraging to see progress! I used to be very sedentary, I thought I could to next to no exercise (which was kind of true- I’d collapse after one push-up), but it’s nice to know that with hard work my abilities can improve. I can’t wait to see what the future brings!

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Question: what to do when you are tired of the journey?

RANT: I've been fat my whole life, in one year I lost 10kg but in the last 4 years my weight skyrocket and I gained 30kg. I restarted my loosing weight journey in the last year, but being honest I'm tired. I lost 5kg in the last months but they all came back, my exams are ok, I have a nutritionist, I exercise but it just seems that it doesn't work for me. I know I'm doing something wrong I'm just feeling tired of fighting against my weight all the time and being in the same place. QUESTION: What do you usually do when you want to give up of your weight loss journey?

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Intimidated by the long road ahead.

Hey all. I've been a lurker of this subreddit for a while now, and since I have nobody to talk to about what's been weighing on my mind, I've decided to share here in hopes that I can get some recognition, advice, words of encouragement or whatever.

My story is kind of a long one so bear with me.

I honestly can't remember a time in my life when I wasn't fat. I've made countless attempts to lose weight and all of them ended in failure. 2019 was when I made my best attempt as I lost 60 lbs, but alas, I ended up gaining it all back and then some in 2020. And in 2020, I knew damn well I was gaining the weight back because I was eating to cope with feelings of loneliness, boredom, uncertainty and sadness, so I didn't care how much or what kind of food I was consuming as long as it tasted good and gave me a sensation of fullness. I avoided the scale like the plague during this time, I just didn't want to deal with the reality that I was undoing all of the progress I made the year before. I mean, of course I knew I was, but seeing an exact number on the scale to find out to what extent would have actually been truly eye-opening and would have crushed me.

I continued to eat emotionally and recklessly throughout 2021. Late 2021, I became a victim of a crime (I'd rather not go into specifics here) and became hospitalized as a result of it. I needed surgery. I couldn't function on my own. And I was already depressed beforehand, and what I went through exacerbated my depression. Once I was discharged from the hospital, I could function better, but I still wasn't fully independent. As you might have guessed, food was my source of comfort while I was recovering, so I ate emotionally and recklessly throughout 2022 as well.

Before one of my surgeries, my surgeon informed me that I was over 300 lbs, and I was kind of shocked but not really? On one hand, I never thought I'd reach such a high number, but on the other hand, I had a feeling that things have gotten that bad because I could hardly fit into any of my clothes anymore and I was breaking furniture in my home just by sitting on them. So, hearing that was definitely unsettling, but I was somewhat relieved to finally know an actual number. He advised that I change my diet soon, but I didn't. Not then.

2023, I'm fully independent now, I've been in therapy, and on March 12th I started a new weight loss/self-improvement journey. My starting weight was 332 lbs. I weighed myself on April 23rd and my weight was 305.2 lbs. I weighed myself a couple of days ago on May 23rd and much to my chagrin my weight was 301.6 lbs. Meaning, I only managed to lose about 4 lbs when I was hoping to have lost more than that (FYI, I don't weigh myself regularly. I don't want to get too caught up in numbers because I know I'll let it affect my mood and determine how I feel about myself and what day I'm going to have).

So, right now, I'm feeling discouraged, scared, hopeless, depressed, etc. I have a lot of fat to lose, and I know complaining about it won't make me lose weight any faster, I know I didn't gain all of the weight overnight so I'm not going to lose it all overnight, I know my ideal body is a long game, yadda yadda yadda...I just have to get my emotions out somewhere. I'm disappointed that things panned out this way, that I let things get this far and I feel so alone because nobody in my life can really relate to me. I don't feel heard or seen by anybody in my life, honestly. My weight has always been my main insecurity. I never felt comfortable or confident in my own skin. Whenever I'm among people at a gathering or party or some social event, I'm afraid to be social. I don't think anybody would take me seriously or talk to me like a human being because I'm so fat. And I was ostracized and bullied and tease for being fat in school which ruined my self-esteem. I'm disgusted by what I see when I look in the mirror. And I just resent that it'll most likely be years before I get to where I want to be.

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