Sunday, March 26, 2023

Feeling Hopeless

I'm 33 years old, currently 250, 5'4.

My dietitian put me on a 1200 cal, 90g protein, 90g or under carb diet.

This feels so unsustainable. I've been on this plan almost a month. Before I started, I was overeating and always hungry. Now I'm eating this diet and I'm still hungry all the time. I'm hitting my protein and then some most days. Carbs I've been doing well but on the weekends, I tend to do very badly since I'll eat out on Friday and I'll want my favorite foods.

I'm so depressed on this plan. I just feel deprived of the things I love. I have food intolerances due to gallbladder issues so that's also making this hard. I just don't know if this plan is right for me or if I'm not giving it enough time?

I've lost 3 or 4 pounds since I started. Which I don't count as real weight loss because one heavy day for me will send me right back up there so it's like no progress is being made.

It doesn't help that my bf is doing this along with me but his BMR and calories are different, since he's taller and he doesn't have the carb restriction. But he's lost like 10 pounds and he pretty much still gets to eat whatever he wants.

It all just feels hopeless. I have anxiety and depression, so this food restriction is not helping me. Most days I don't even want to eat but I'm just so hungry that I have to. I just feel like I don't know what to do. I'm so unhappy.

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Bout 30lbs overweight and got hit on today.

I have a couple progress pics on an older account of mine that showed a weight loss of up to 30lbs. I was doing 1200cals and exercising regularly on top of a very busy job. Needless to say I gained it all back and THEN some. I decided to wait and take things slow until my efforts were out of self love rather than self hatred. I’m not currently counting calories as it gives me anxiety and I am enjoying myself while trying to be mindful, but I did jsut recently get back into the gym because it makes me feel good and I may as well work on body comp even though I’m not actively “cutting”

I’m 153 lbs, 5’0 . About 32%bf. I got hit on twice today by some very sweet men. It made me feel really good because a lot of the women at the gym are very fit and super pretty. I know my newfound confidence makes me look better, but it was surprising.

I also know that men are typically more comfortable approaching women they’re not as attracted to, but it still felt so cool and I was very confident the whole time and it got me through the rest of my workouts.

If I’m considered cute now, then there’s no “rush” to get to 110lbs. I can enjoy the process knowing I’m just as worthy and beautiful - and so can you! Your worth is the same whether you’re 400lbs or 95lbs. The moment you realize this, the moment this journey will be less anxious and more enjoyable/sustainable

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Progress, being 50+, and "everything all at once"

This is sort of a self-introduction and progress post, but I thought I would share an experience. In general, I think the advice to make small, gradual changes is good. I approve of it in principle, even though I haven’t been able to build up from these changes successfully in the past. But that is not what happened this time. I didn’t really choose my approach, rather I was somewhat driven to it…but, it’s working.

How it started:

At the end of 2022, I was having a combination depressive episode and midlife crisis moment that was only exacerbated by the bacchanalia and enforced gaiety of the holidays. In an effort to climb out, give myself a project or two, and turn crisis into opportunity, I decided to try out a few simultaneous changes to my diet and lifestyle, figuring that if even some portion of them stuck it would be an improvement. On December 31, I did the following:

  • I stopped eating meat. I do still eat fish, but with a bias toward small fish (sardines above all, but also anchovies, mackerel, herring, etc.) and shellfish (clams, oysters, shrimp, crab, squid). I also still consume eggs and milk products. So pesco-ovo-lacto, but I have shifted to basing a lot of my meals around legumes and soy (tofu, tempeh). This was not primarily about weight loss or even health, but it has made me think about what I cook and eat.
  • I stopped drinking alcohol. This, also, was not primarily about weight loss. I needed to start by determining how problematic my relationship to alcohol was.
  • Then I figured that I may as well try to lose weight too. I eyeballed down my portion sizes, tried to eliminate junk food snacking, and aimed for protein and fiber at every meal while curtailing starches and sugar.
  • I had never stopped going to the gym entirely. I’ve been going to gyms, off and on, for weights and/or cardio, since my teens. But my last real moment of high gym effort was 7-8 years ago, in my mid-40s, and it was eventually slowed by a shoulder injury and unrelated hospitalization. By late 2022 I was going 2-3 days a week, more or less just for cardio. This was certainly a good thing. But starting with the new year, I’ve been trying to increase my intensity, and on an ideal week now aim to go 5 days/week for strength and hypertrophy-oriented resistance work, with the standard goal of trying to maintain musculature while in deficit, along with 20-30 minutes of cardio in which I mostly try to get my heart rate up for a decent interval or two. On days 6-7, I usually get some walking in.
  • I tried to start walking more in everyday life – notably, to/from work, which is about 1.5 miles away.

To be honest, I haven’t been counting calories or measuring portions closely. Since my old, bad diet had kept me hovering at 230+/-5 lbs. for a few years, I just figured that the new, improved version would be enough to kick me into deficit, and it has been. I mean, for starters, I was probably drinking 3-400 calories in alcohol per day; that’s 3/4 of a pound per week with no other changes. But I probably should get a bit more precise in the future.

How it’s going:

Not bad, over all. I probably came in a bit hot. I track my daily weight, a seven-day change, and then a trailing week’s average of seven-day changes, and for a bit in January that average seven-day loss was over four pounds/week. OK, water weight. But my February average was three pounds/week, and by that point I think any water weight effect should have disappeared. I’ve tried consciously to eat a bit more to bend that down to two pounds/week or less, and that mostly has worked in March. But my energy is up, so I think I escaped unscathed. My face is narrower, my waist has dropped from a tight 36 to a loose 34, and a 43 jacket that I couldn’t button three months ago is loose around the middle. The 46 is now a tent. My acid reflux has disappeared.

Beyond a planned “cheat day” on January 6, when we had dinner over friends’ house, I’ve stuck to my meatless diet, although I’ve compromised on salmon on a few occasions, particularly at restaurants whose version of vegetarian is dreary or protein-less. I’ll probably land on some version of flexitarian long-term, because of social obligations and because there are places I travel where non-meat eating can be harder, but I’m trying to be strict at home. I kept to no (significant) alcohol – I do still cook with wine – from January 6 until March 10, when we went on vacation and I had a few drinks over a few days. Then I stopped. Then I had a Guinness for St. Patrick’s Day. Then I stopped again. Empty calories aside, this was to be demonstrated. Likewise, I would be happy to land as an occasional drinker.

I do cook, and my staples for winter were a variety of bean/legume stews - ribollita, a variation on lentil and beef stew substituting roast mushrooms for the umami element, pea soup without ham, a ground nut soup, variations on chana masala. Also some other soups, like seafood gumbo and clam chowder (minus bacon). I still do have pasta (puttanesca, for one), just watch the portion size. Also, I do a lot of stir-fries with tofu, tempeh, or shrimp. For lunch, I gravitate to leftovers, hard-boiled eggs, hummus, or a can of sardines with some vegetables or fruit. For breakfast, a bowl with some added fruit and greens and a bit of muesli based around yoghurt or cottage cheese, or sometimes some eggs. I also make up big batches of foul mudammas – Egyptian cumin-lemon fava beans – throwing in some kale or spinach or a bunch of cilantro and keeping the olive oil grace notes down. Other favorite things include unsweetened kefir, good feta, and, for snacking, dry-roasted edamame, which is what I reach for instead of the salty snacks (chips, pretzels) I used to love. Highly recommended if you are not specifically sodium- or soy-adverse; look at that protein, look at that fiber.

At the gym, I think I’m still making slight strength gains, which, without measuring myself constantly, is the proxy for my attempt to lose more fat than muscle. In absolute terms, I’m not strong. In relative terms, well, the ship of my 25-year-old strength has probably sailed, but I wonder if I can get back to where I was at 45 (without having been lean, then). Possibly that will have to wait for maintenance.

I live in a city where DEXA scans are commercially available and affordable, so I had one in early February when I weighed 213. That showed 136.8 lbs. lean tissue, 6.6 bone mineral content, and 69.7 lbs. (32.7%) body fat. I set 175 lbs. as an initial goal weight based upon the idea that if I can maintain those lean mass figures, that would bring me a few pounds below 20% body fat. Big if, but it struck me as a point at which I might want to take stock and decide whether I want to glide toward maintenance or recomp or something like that. Plus, it was a college weight I remember. Plus, it would be an even 50 pounds. Or maybe I’ll decide to shoot for 170 or 165.

The last few weeks have given me my first pause and significant setback. We went, briefly, on vacation on March 10 and ate out a lot for the next few days, and the hotel gym facilities were sub-optimal. I was paying attention, but not religiously, and not weighing myself. And then, at the beginning of last week, I came down with Covid, and while it wasn’t a bad case I’ve been dealing with that for the last few days and certainly not trying to be in deficit. I’m mostly over it now, and was able to go on a walk of a few miles this morning, but for a variety of obvious reasons I do want to take it slow in going back to the gym itself. Still, March 10 195.4 lbs. to March 26 191.2 lbs., but some of that may not have been good weight to lose.

Fun things about being over 50:

I have a usual assortment of joint issues: back, ankles, a prior shoulder impingement, and bad patellar tracking on my left knee. Just four days of no exercise with Covid left the latter feeling really sketchy. None of this is improved by weight, but neither does it go away magically with weight loss. I’m still not going to be a runner.

I also tried to push weight on legs a bit quickly, and gave myself a bilateral high adductor strain – aka a groin pull – that has been lingering for a good eight weeks now. I do miss rapid recovery.

My testosterone tanked circa 2021. This is not something I’ve addressed. There’s an inverse feedback loop between testosterone levels and adiposity, so I’ll be curious to see whether it comes back.

Likewise, I’ve been on a statin and a blood pressure medication for almost twenty years. They have had very low side effects for me. I’ll be interested to see whether my doctor advises weaning off.

Fat on my face made me look young; as I lose it I’m starting to see more wrinkles. Worth the price, but still.

Finally, let’s just say that forum advice to keep hydration up and get a good night’s sleep have been at odds when I’ve been getting up to pee four times a night!

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Saturday, March 25, 2023

Just finished my first month of my weight loss my thoughts so far

21M / SW: 323 / CW: 307.8 / GW: 180

One month ago a switch just flipped inside of me and I was given a new mindset in life. I finally realized this is something that I will not fail at and so far everything has been going fantastic! I'm currently down 15.2 lbs. I was going for a 1.5 lbs per week loss eating 2100 calories per day and for me this has been plenty of food and has not been a problem for me thus far. Along with being in a calorie deficit I decided that I was going to start doing 10,000 steps per day and I'm happy to say that I was able to hit this goal every single day many of those days I'm going a few thousand over that 10 thousand steps. The things that I have found most encouraging is watching the people who have succeeded so far I find it so motivating and just pushed me even further.

Things that I would like to accomplish in the next month:
- Continue my 10,000 step goal
- Begin goin to the gym ideally going 3-4 times a week
- Prioritizing protein in my diet to conserve muscle mass

Overall I have been absolutely loving my time so far and I know I'm in this for the long haul and will succeed.

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Tips on weight loss for trip

I’m trying to lose weight for my anniversary trip in September… I have lost 80 pounds in 4 months doing keto, however, it gave me terrible kidney stones, and with the pandemic I gained it all back, and then some. And well, I love to partake in almost all things cannabis so that doesn’t help. I also have PCOS, which makes it harder to lose weight… I’m on adderrall for my ADHD and am about to start ozempic for my pre diabetes. Obviously I know “eat less” and you will lose, but I’m also trying to tone as well. I have a lot of cellulite and I want to firm up my legs and thighs more than anything. For reference I’m 30, 5’10 and about 280 lbs. thanks 😇

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Starting my weight loss journey

I’m 25F and want to get serious about my weight loss journey, so I’m posting here for accountability and hopefully to get support from the community.

My starting point: Height: 171cm Weight: 81kg BMI: 27 Waist: 83cm Hips: 119cm

Goal weight: 60kg

My back story: - Was anorexic/underweight throughout my teenage years - Recovered mentally but continued to under-eat as I reached adulthood - Went on an intentional weight gain journey a few years ago - In less than a year, I reached my desired weight, but I had fallen into poor eating habits as I saw food as a free-for-all since I was trying to gain weight - Haven’t been able to stop gaining weight since then

My main problem areas are: - Sugar, especially chocolate - Night eating - Lack of exercise/sedentary lifestyle

I want to stress that I don’t think I’m ugly or fat. I actually think I have great curves. But there are a few good reasons why I want to lose weight:

  1. Ever since hitting about 70kg, I find myself wearing sweatpants 99% of the time. It’s really hard to find clothes that look good and feel comfortable on me. Because all of my excess weight has gone to my hips, any jeans I buy will be too tight on my hips and too loose on my waist. Any dresses will fit my ass but have a ton of extra fabric around the chest. I just feel like I’m forced to dress frumpy and it’s really affecting my confidence.

  2. I’d like to have some “wiggle room” with my weight before I have kids. My mom was thin before she had kids, but afterwards, she gained weight and has struggled with trying to lose it ever since. Even though she is much more disciplined and active than me, and doesn’t really eat sweets or junk food. And we have very similar body types/shapes, so I feel like what happened to her is likely to happen to me. So the way I think of it is, if I drop down to 60kg before I have kids and then get back up to 80kg after kids, I can live with that. That’s fine. But I don’t wanna start off at 80kg and end up at 100kg after kids.

  3. I just want to be fitter in general. I really don’t like exercise right now, so I almost never do any exercise, but I’ve been noticing for a couple years now already that I get out of breath just from going up one flight of stairs, or while putting on my clothes, or talking too quickly. My resting heart rate is in the 80s-90s whenever I measure it. I just feel like my health is deteriorating and it’s only gonna get harder to fix that the older I get, so I better start now.

My game plan: - I’d LOVE to reach my 60kg goal by the end of this year, but I’d still be really happy if I just made it down to 70kg. - Eat more protein - Find lower calorie sweet treats I can enjoy - Take longer walks with my dogs

I also REALLY want to get an Apple Watch. I don’t wanna do that thing people do where they’re like “I will work on my goals AFTER I buy this thing” and then it inevitably doesn’t actually help them. But, tracking data is really important for me, and I feel like because I can’t accurately track my calories burned when I exercise, I’m less motivated to do it. So I think an Apple Watch would just encourage me by giving me reliable data on my progress and feeling like my workouts actually “count”.

Any advice or encouragement would be appreciated! Happy to answer any questions.

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hit a big weight loss goal today! (+an unrelated question)

in january of 2022 i started losing weight and went from 245 pounds to 200 pounds. after maintaining 200 pounds for about a year, i recently decided to start losing again, and today i hit 190 pounds, which means i’m no longer classified as obese by bmi and am officially over halfway to my goal weight of 145 pounds!

also, i’m 20 pounds lighter than the fake weight i put on my state id when i was seventeen (which i think is my favorite thing).

i know the last of it will be much slower and harder, but i’m proud and excited anyway.

(also, unrelated question, i’m getting my gallbladder out this week because of gallstones. i’m excited about the changes i’ll have to make to my diet because before i was only restricting calories. if anyone has any extra tips for the low-fat diet it would be appreciated!)

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