Lost weight but feel so lost with my progress

Hello!
I(26f) currently weigh in at 79kg(174 lbs). My starting weight was 99kg(218 lbs), so I’ve lost about 20kg(44 lbs).
I’ve been trying to lose weight for pretty much my entire conscious life. This is the most weight I’ve ever managed to lose, but weirdly, I don’t feel like I’m in control of it.
I’ve known for a very long time how to lose weight. I’ve known about calories, exercise, steps, etc. But I’ve never been able to consistently stick with it I also struggle with binge eating(a lot).
I’m trying really hard to change my entire mindset around food, weight, and dieting. I know that I want to lose more weight, ideally around another 15-20kg(33-44lbs) but what scares me is that I don’t actually understand what is different this time.
I don’t know what suddenly made it “click.” I don’t know why I was able to lose 20 kg this time when I’ve struggled with my weight for so long. And because I don’t know what caused the change, it makes me feel like I don’t have any control over whether I’ll loose more.
I’m constantly afraid of gaining the weight back.
Recently, I had a few days where I didn’t count calories, and over the course of maybe a week or two, the scale went up by around 1.5 kg. I know that this isn’t necessarily a big deal, and I know that weight can fluctuate for all kinds of reasons. I’m trying to get back into my “routine” now, but it just made everything feel so fragile.

I keep trying to remind myself that I have managed to lose this weight. So surely I’m capable of maintaining it and eventually losing the rest too. But emotionally, I’m just so fucking scared.
And I really, really want to lose the weight. I’ve wanted this more than almost anything for such a long time. I’m also not planning on taking medication for weight loss. I feel like if I’ve managed to get this far without it, I should be able to make it all the way.

Normally, when I decide to lose weight, it’s very deliberate. I tell myself, “Okay, I’m going to lose weight now,” and then I start exercising, counting calories, making sure I get my steps in, and doing all the things I’m “supposed” to do.
This time, it almost feels like a haze i never really made that conscious decision in the way I normally do.
I’m incredibly happy about the progress, but at the same time, it feels fragile because I don’t understand what happened or why it worked this time.
I think I mostly just needed to write this off my chest. But if anyone has experienced something similar then I would love to hear about it!
Thank you for reading❤️

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Weight Loss Goal!!

Hey yall, I just wanted to post to talk about something that I'm proud of. Years back, I was around 167-170lbs which is crazy to think about and when I started my weight loss journey, my goal weight was 120lbs. Today, I hopped on the scale and it read 119lbs. Not only did I reach my goal, but I surpassed it. I'm incredibly proud of myself and how far I've come. (Also, before anyone gets concerned or anything, I'm very short. Only 4'11 lol)

I'm wishing everyone else luck and and success on your own weight loss journeys!

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Feeling discouraged today

I'm a 42 yo, 5'3 female. Today I had my yearly physical and feeling discouraged.

Last year at my physical, I weighed in at 172 pounds and had borderline high cholesterol. I was also started on high blood pressure medication.

Today I weighed in at 139 pounds which I know is about a 19% weight loss. I've lost it slowly over the year. Started out at about 5 pounds per month and now about 1 - 1.5 pounds per month. I have gone 260 days getting in at least 10,000 steps per day. I walk about 2-3 miles on the treadmill every day. I started strength training about 2 days a week 1.5 monthd ago. I mostly eat about 1300-1400 calories per day. Sometimes more if I go out with friends or family. I have also really decreased my red meat and dairy consumption over the last year.

Today at my provider's visit, she did not mention anything about weight loss. I'm not sure she even noticed it in the chart. About 4 months ago, I had to decrease my blood pressure medication because I was tired frequently. Today I wanted to discuss doing a trial without it which she immediately said to stay on it. My cholesterol has also increased since last year instead of decreasing.

I feel like I've made a lot of improvements in my health the last year. Just discouraged that none of it was acknowledged at my annual physical and my cholesterol actually increased.

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How do I make the most of getting a health coach?

Hi everyone! I've been over 200 lbs since around the pandemic and have been trying to the lose weight over the last 5 years off and on. This year, I've been trying to stay committed to losing the weight. So this past April, I got a health coach through a program from my insurance. I love my coach and she's been super encouraging! She's helping me introduce positive habits into my life, and is open to me messaging her and asking questions. But I feel like I'm struggling to use her and her resources to their full potential in order for me to succeed fully? I come from a household that didn't encourage me to seek help or open up to others so it was something I really struggled to do with my coach and the only time we would really talk is when she would reach out during our monthly check-in. Like I want to reach out to her for something? But I don't know what to say to her or how to ask for help or even where I need help. I just end up feeling lost in that area.

I've lost a little over 10 lbs since working with her, but we missed our last appointment (and due to some personal issues in my life) , I've lost a lot of the positive habits that kept me losing and my weight-loss has stagnated.

I'm currently 214 lbs and want to re-commit the rest of my year to losing enough to be under 200lb before I turn 26! I feel like it's super doable but I still want her help in doing so, since she kept me positive and accountable while losing my first 10lbs, but this time, I want to make the most of it! Does anyone have any advice on using a life coach to lose weight? I'm also very open to any general weight loss tips 😊

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I hate myself

I’m 31F 240 lbs and I’m beginning to hate myself really bad because of my weight. I gained a significant amount of weight since 2019 when my mom was diagnosed with an incurable cancer. Since then, I was her primary caretaker and also needed to look after my aging, disabled uncle who lived with us. During that time, I started bingeing as food was my only form of comfort because I was extremely lonely and stressed out. I was also beginning to grieve my mom as we were super close and I knew that she didn’t have long to live. I was emotionally overwhelmed with loneliness, anxiety, and depression and was clinging to things that could make me somewhat happy even for a moment: food. Fast forward, I still feel extremely lonely even though I have friends and ultimately feel a void inside myself that I don’t know how to fix. Romantically, I’ve been rejected a lot (even when I was my skinniest). I don’t think I’m “ugly”, but I’ve seen the ways people talk about fat people and it has really made me feel ugly and worthless. Even the way people talk about losing weight to “get hotter” and general comments about overweight people. I’m tired of the only solution people come up with in feeling this way is to lose weight. I know I need to lose weight but I want to do it for myself and not other people or because that’s what other people want me to do. I am actively taking steps to lose weight, but I feel like it’s because of the self loathing I have due to how everyone treats and talks about overweight people. I feel like I’m being pushed into a corner and it makes me feel even worse. I hate the fact that I don’t feel pretty at my current weight and no matter how I even feel about myself, society will always look at me and how stereotypes about me without knowing how much I’ve been through and how hard I’m trying to take care of myself everyday. It’s even getting to the point where I don’t want to be seen in public. It doesn’t feel good to be judged or treated differently and it’s all getting to me. I’m seeing a therapist but what others think of me/might think of me (including my friends and family) still bothers me on a daily basis. Sometimes I feel afraid to even lose weight because if my friends or anyone starts treating me differently, it will break my heart because it would let me know how low they viewed me at my current weight. Any advice on how to shake/manage these feelings while trying to work towards my weight loss goals? Please be nice. P

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Stuck at 261

I’m 68m 5’8” very active walk 4+ miles a day do kickboxing 3 times a week. Started my weight loss journey at 345 18 months ago. Started at 2000 calories a day and exercising as much as my body could take. I hit a plateau at 280 so I dropped to 1600 or so calories a day and I track everything, got down now to 261. I have hit another plateau I can’t get passed. My TDEE says for extreme weight loss at my exercise level to be at 1825 calories a day so I’m already below that, so I don’t understand why I’m not losing more. I feel tired a lot of the time and get moody I guess because I’m not eating enough, but I don’t want to eat more and start gaining. Any suggestions out there?

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Tips to be in a calorie deficit without actually counting calories

Hi everyone, since I have anxiety, counting calories stresses me up. I am struggling to stick to calorie deficit because of that, even though it works for me. I just need to hear your experiences regarding weight loss without counting calories, if there are any. Also, I use 15-20 g oil/ butter a day (my daily calorie intake is 1500) and my food is just dry all the time and I feel miserable. Any tips for that too? (English is not my first language, so please forgive any mistakes I've made). Thank you all.

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