March 20, 2018: the day I realized I genuinely hated the person I had become.
On that day, I weighed about 253 pounds (I didn’t have a scale at that time, so I was going by what I weighed at my last doctor’s appointment – could have been more or less), I was completely unfit, and I was a mental and emotional mess. Before this day, I thought I was fine, but a perfect storm of problems came onto me at once, and it really showed that there was a list of things wrong with me. My subsequent breakdown, which led to me crying to a close friend about not being in a good state to travel to meet her after having the trip planned and booked for close to a year was (and still is) the lowest moment of my life.
However, I’ve come to realize that day was a blessing in disguise. I knew exactly what was wrong with me, and I had to take the steps to fix what ailed me. The stakes went up exponentially about a month later when my grandfather passed away due to a litany of weight-related issues. His passing was the biggest kick in the ass I needed. If I didn’t get my body into a state of healthiness, I was going to be following his path to eventual sickness and death. That was a fate that I, as a 26 year old, did not want to have fall on me.
Today is December 16, 2018, and I have lost about 80 pounds since that March day, with another ten or so left until I hit my final goal of 160 pounds. Today I also ran my second competitive 5k and finished in 27:30. As I was driving back home from having brunch after the 5k, I started to reflect on the last nine months, and I can confidently say that I’ve learned more in that time period than I have during any other period of my life. I’ve also experienced a huge number of changes that I will briefly talk about.
But first, I feel that reflecting would be most beneficial to all of you because it shows what I’ve learned, and what you should know when you undertake a weight-loss journey (no matter if you want to lose ten pounds, 100, or any other quantity).
I’m going to start with the one that really hurts the most, but is the most important: weight-loss is NOT a cure-all. Please don’t get me wrong, weight-loss will do absolute wonders on your physical health (and potentially mental health, which I will discuss later on). However, it will not fix everything. When I started my weight-loss journey, I also started meeting with a therapist to help me through my anxiety, which was affecting me more than I had realized. Much like my working with a therapist, you may (and likely will) realize that the path of self-betterment involves more than dropping weight, whether that entails undergoing therapy, being prescribed medication for a physical or mental condition, or confronting other demons in your life.
Knowing and accepting this is a major part of your journey, which also leads to my next reflection: you MUST remain realistic. The weight is not going to go away overnight, all of your problems will not be solved by weight loss, and you must remain patient and trust the process because it does absolutely work, but only if you stick with it. Another bitter pill to swallow: weight control isn’t a short-term undertaking; it goes until the moment you die. If you think you’re home-free after you lose the weight, you are completely wrong and are already setting yourself up for failure down the road.
Yes, I know the last couple paragraphs were very blunt, and that was by design to stress the seriousness of the first two points. This one may seem blunt, but there’s some light to this one. The point is that you WILL slip-up during this journey. There will be days where you go over your calorie limit (sometimes by a substantial amount). However, that is absolutely ok! Not only can we learn from these days, but they are also beneficial because (at least in my case) they boost metabolism once you go back to your deficit. Also, psychologically you need cheat days/meals so you don’t go crazy…it’s as simple as that. When you have a slip-up (not “if” because it absolutely will happen), just take it in stride, learn from it, and get right back on the wagon.
So let’s switch gears and talk about how I lost my extra weight. First and foremost, it was by following the CICO principle. For those of you new to this subreddit (and if you are, welcome!), CICO simply means “calories in, calories out.” If you eat less calories than you burn a day, you’ll lose weight. If you do the opposite…you get the idea. As far as eating goes, that is about it. I didn’t cut carbs out, I didn’t do the fat-free thing, I didn’t go paleo, or any of the other strategies many of you have successfully employed. For me, this boiled down to one thing: sustainability. Personally, following CICO allowed me to make an easily sustainable change because I wasn’t restricting WHAT I was eating, but just HOW MUCH. As I followed this, I also became friends with vegetables, gaining both a taste for them and a knowledge of how healthy and filling they can be. I also started to learn about macros and how to incorporate them effectively for both exercise and satiation purposes. As for exercise, I’ve been involved in martial arts, running, and recently strength training. Not only are they good for fitness, but they are also fantastic stress relievers. Besides, in my opinion, exercise and fitness are starting to become less of a thing I HAVE to do and more of a thing I WANT to do…may even be becoming a hobby.
All that in the previous paragraph said, I also realize that the methods that I employed may not work for you, or you may wish to follow a different plan. And you know what? That is a perfectly acceptable answer. The weight-loss problem has a huge number of correct solutions, and the only way you will find what works for you is to experiment. Once you find what works for you, you will instantly know and be able to stick with it. You just need to make sure that the method you choose is sustainable not only through weight-loss, but into maintenance. Sustainability is the number one factor in choosing a weight-loss method, and it must remain number one forever.
“Blah, blah, blah, u/Coffee_Flavor_Coffee, I don’t care about the wall of text above! What changes have you experienced?”
Well…my shirt size went from XXL to M, my pant size went from 36x30 to 30x30 (depending on the store), my belly fat is almost gone (working on strength training for that), I am in the best shape I’ve ever been, and my personal confidence is the highest it’s ever been. As for extra skin, still unsure as I still have a bit of belly fat, but I think I’ll end up with a little bit. Yes, I know the changes were short and to-the-point, but I more wanted this post to be reflective. If you want to discuss more specific changes, either comment on this or DM me please. Also, I may post progress pics soon - unsure when.
As for the future, I’m close to entering maintenance, which will certainly be a challenge, but it is a new challenge that I am beyond ready and excited for.
If you have any questions that I did not answer, need encouragement, or are seeking an accountability partner, please feel absolutely free to either comment or DM me. I am always willing to talk about my experience in more detail, provide advice, be a listening ear (or reading eye?), coach you through your journey, or anything else.
To all of you who are starting the journey, currently on the journey, almost done losing, or in maintenance, you are absolutely amazing, and you are showing a tremendous amount of courage on one of the most difficult endeavors you could ever undertake. On the good days, bad days, and those in between, keep your head up because I have faith that you will succeed in your journey and accomplish your goals!
TL;DR: You know what, I just spent a good deal of time putting this together from the heart. Just take five minutes and please read it. Thank you.
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