Partner gaining more weight

So we (20's M and F) both have been trying to lose weight for a long time and I'll be the first to admit that I'm not perfect either. This year has been stressful for us both and he has always been incredibly supportive of me and my weight loss attempts/discussion. But recently I've been getting worried about the direction he's going in.

I am very upfront about my eating issues and talk often about weighing myself, calorie counting, and overeating. He supports me but believes that his issues aren't about overeating. He also isn't really active unless its with me. Overall he seems to prefer when we both do our own thing about weight loss and I know that me talking about my efforts too much stresses him out.

With that context: the last four months he has gained a lot of weight. He already struggles with cardiovascular and respiratory issues. I know he is "trying" but I think he doesn't understand how much he's eating and how little he is active. But I also know it doesn't really help when I talk about it and it just stresses him out.

I love him and I'm attracted to him and I'm committed to our relationship. I also don't want to micromanage his life or worry him. But I can't help but worry about his health.

My current plan: whenever we feel like getting take-out offering to make dinner instead, cooking healthy meals in small portions when its my turn to cook, and to keep inviting him on walks with me. But these are things I've been trying for months already

Please, how to help my partner without becoming controlling or stressing him out? Or should I just chill about his journey, focus on my own, and assume he'll figure it out on his own?

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Lesson: strict cuts and restrictions are NOT FOR ME

I'm getting close to one year since I took my "before" pictures, and have been hovering at having lost around 30 pounds for months, i thought it would be nice to say i lost 50 pounds my first year. So I decided to only eat 1200 calories a day, and work out every week day. This was instead of my usual working out 3 times a week and eating between 1200 and 1700 calories without restrictions.

Long story short, my 1200 calorie weeks coincided with the most stressful week I've had at work in a long time, some wild pms, some family drama, all resulting in the fact that I've been stuffing my face as much as I can. Instead of losing weight I've gained 5 pounds, instead of going to the gym every day I've skipped KB class. Meal prep has flown out the window. Calorie counting? What is that? I've felt like total crap, I'm bloated, I'm squishy, my stomach hurts all the time.

Lesson learned! Strict restrictions may work for some people, but not for me. I have a lot of stress in my daily life and stacking hunger on top of that just makes me a neurotic, snacking, mess. I enjoy going to the gym but I'm not going to force myself to go at 4 in the morning. I might not have the rapid paced incredible weightloss that so many people have, but slow and steady has been working and if it ain't broke don't fix it. I admire people that have great control but I'm not there yet.

So I'm using this post as a little pledge to myself. I'm going to keep going slow and steady, I'm going to be nice to myself, and I'm going to stop giving myself weight loss deadlines. I have an open ended goal, to reach a healthy weight, and as long as I'm working towards that I'm doing okay.

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feel like I've been knocked off my feet

I've been steadily loosing weight since I started my weight loss journey towards the end of October last year I was eating at a caloric deficit and doing around 10k steps and even lifting weights 4-5 times a week but 2 weeks ago things changed my mother lost her boyfriend who I saw like a step father to heart disease noone had any idea that he had any problems with his health so it knocked us all off our feet and now I just can't seem to find the energy to lift and I've been eating more then I was I weighed myself today and I've put on like 4lb and as soon as I had weighed myself I just felt even worse like I've failed sorry if this is the wrong place to post this I just felt like I needed to get it off my chest.

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Struggling to lose weight again.

Hey y'all,

I'm a 5'6" dude that currently weighs 240 lbs. Around 4 years ago, I weighed around the same, and I had the motivation and the discipline to lose the weight all the way down to 175 lbs. I ate around 1300 calories a day and I would check the scale every other day and see if my weight would drop. I would do cardio 6 days a week and if I felt like it, I would even do 7. Now, I am currently struggling to get back on the wagon, and I've chalked it up to a couple specific details:

1. I get back on the weight loss grind and I eat around 1300-1500 calories a day but I can only keep back on it for about a week and then I fall back to my old ways of binge eating.

2. I get INSANE cravings around 10 PM. It happens often enough that I would want to eat something nice before going to bed and I end up going to a fast food place, watch a video on my computer, and then go right back to sleep.

3. Every day I wake up I tell myself I am going to go to the gym. However, as the day goes on, I make up excuses in my head such as "Oh I have so much homework tonight that I need to go home and do as much as I can" or "I can just eat less and it'll be okay".

I look back at pictures of my old self and I realize that if I managed to do it once, I can do it again. Problem is, I just don't know how to address these issues, and I might get back on the grind and then fall off of it in a week. I never saw it during the time, but I realized that I looked really good and I also wanna feel really good as well. If anyone can help that would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

For reference: https://imgur.com/mRb8Vpv Me back then. https://imgur.com/lLVa3X0 Me now.

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How to manage the extreme hunger after losing weight ?

I'm 5'11 male 142 pounds, formerly 257, been maintaining for several months. I suffer from extreme hunger a lot since trying to maintain my weight. It feels uncontrollable, like a wild animal. I make sure I never have food in the house sometimes, except vegetables. One time I was so desperate I binge ate a bag of frozen peas and carrots. It felt like it should have been some kind of low point, lol.

My old tactics are volume eating, drinking lots of coffee, drinking lots of water..plus a few other not so nice things. But they don't work anymore. Only thing that seems to work is sleep but it just delays it.I asked my GP to prescribe appetite suppressants and other weight loss drugs, but she would not due to my weight and said it could make me underweight (no risk of that lol). I tried to explain what the extreme hunger was actually like, but she didn't seem to get it.

I feel tired a lot because i waste so much energy thinking about food and trying not to eat too much. And yes I eat a healthy amount that maintains my weight but it doesn't feel like enough, even though I know it is. (I track and weigh everything). My diet is high in protein with a low to medium amount of carbs. I fast one day a week, but I do make up for the calories. The food I eat does next to nothing to get rid of the hunger.

Anyone else had this issue? I don't want to lose more weight, but I also don't want to gain any fat or eat more. I'm hoping that this is fixable but it's so tiring. It makes me so depressed constantly resisting temptation, and when I do give in I have to work it off which just make me hungry again.

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Finally learned what may have been holding me back

I have always struggled with weight loss, especially with hypothyroidism. But you know what I discovered on Monday or Tuesday? My maintenance calories and BMR calculation were way fucking off. I use the TDEE calculator, this one for calculating it. It turns out, inputting your body fat percentage makes a huge difference that my noob self didn’t realize.

I also hadn’t calculated my body fat in months, so it was needing to be updated anyway lol

ANYWAY, the calculation difference was almost 1000 calories. So it turned out, I’ve been eating my maintenance calories for the last 3 months, not at a -800 to -1000 caloric deficit like I thought! (Which wasn’t a dangerous amount for me. My incorrectly calculated maintenance calories was 2900). I had just figured it was so high because I’m so fat.

It turns out, at 5’6” with about 69% body fat (nice) puts my BMR at about 1700 calories, IF I didn’t have hypothyroidism (because I know that makes it lower).

So now I can eat at the right caloric amount and adjust as I go! It’s a win I wanted to share, since my only other post was me bitching months ago

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A new priority

Hey all. Long-time lurker here. I'm writing this at 12AM after eating an entire 150g chocolate bar because I weighed myself for the first time in a week and somehow went from 65 to 68 kg. Yes, the chocolate was rage-chocolate after seeing that number jump.

I've decided that I can't keep doing this. The #1 thing hindering my weight loss efforts is binge eating. Although I'm not diagnosed, I am pretty sure I have Binge Eating Disorder. So I'm switching my priorities right now. I'm at a healthy weight (approx 66 kg or 146 lbs) for my height (1.67m or 5'6), and while I'd like to lose another 5 kg (12 lbs), that can be put aside. The pressing issue is my relationship with food. I'm 21 years old and know that if I don't fix this problem now, it's going to have negative consequences for me down the line.

So, I am posting my pledge here to change my priorities and to repair my relationship with food. I've had quite the rocky relationship with food: anorexic/severely underweight at 14, overweight at 18, and now healthy weight at 21. It's time for me to fix this. My new plan: eat like a "normal person." This means no hiding food, no sneaking snacks, eating meals with my family, and even getting ice cream when my friends do. I'm going to not check my weight for a while and truly focus on building a more stable relationship with food.

Thank you all for listening to this half-asleep rant/promise/whatever it was.

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