I lost 17 lbs!!

I lost 17 lbs!!

It’s not a lot to some of you but I’ve been struggling at the same weight for over a month. FINALLY dropped 2 lbs! I plan to keep it off by working out 4 times a week, and I’ll still be walking and doing yoga on rest days because I enjoy it. My gym membership is currently frozen so I have to workout at home.. I hope it doesn’t ruin my progress!!

I also need to lose another 30 lbs hopefully before the year is over. My goal is 50 but at my slow rate I don’t think it will happen lol.

2 years ago I weighed 266. Gained up to 295 again this year and refused to push past 300. Then 2020 hit and I guess I stopped checking my weight as much though I was still staying active. Anyway, I just had to post it somewhere! I have no one to talk to about my weight loss progress, but I am also doing it for me. No one else!

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I’m mad at myself for getting fat. (RANT)

Sorry in advance this is more of a rant than anything else. I won’t repeat my whole story since I’ve posted here a few times before about it but long story short: I lost 35+ lbs last year, changed jobs, dad died unexpectedly, gained it all back plus another 25+lbs making me my highest EVER of 240. I’ve been unpacking a lot of childhood issues in therapy which has lead me to realize I gained a lot of weight as a kid. Mainly from being homeschooled and left home alone 8 hours a day while my parents worked. All I had was food. Cut to age 12, I was actually perfectly healthy, maybe a little chunky. But my mom is a narcissist with major ED tendencies and always indirectly told me I ate too much and was fat. Cut to high school, I lived with my friend most the time and she ate fast food 3 times a day and stayed lean so I adapted the same diet... but I blew up. Gained 50-75lbs by sophomore year and it just continued. All of this to say, the more I think on it the more I am so MAD. I’m so pissed that I ate myself to this point and that now my 20’s need to be spent getting my health together instead of enjoying everything else “regular” people do. I just feel disgusted with myself and disappointed. I wish I hadn’t gotten fat in the first place and I’m really scared of how long it may take to get healthy. I’ve never been successful at weight loss and I’m afraid I’ll YO YO forever and eventually gain more... I dont know I just feel so defeated. Thanks for listening to me vent if you made it this far.. cheers!

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Ten years ago, my best friend gave me a ring.

My best friend gave me a ring of a butterfly. The ring is pretty intricate and detailed, but is completely made of silver. I rarely take the ring off. I've worn it nearly every day for the past 10 years.

When I first got it, I put it on my middle finger.

When I started gaining weight, it became too tight, so I put it on my ring finger. Eventually, it was too tight there and so I put it on my pinky.

Today, my ring fits on my middle finger again.

Weight loss has been such an amazing journey. Yes, I feel better. Yes, my clothes for better. Yes, I am happier.

But the thing made me really appreciate how far I've gone is this ring being returned to it's original place. It's rightful place.

I hope I never have to take it off this finger ever again.

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After years of saying "no," I want to be able to say "yes."

I'm 26F, 5'6, and my SW was 175 lbs and CW is 168 lbs. I'm going to take you through my past a bit before I get to where I am now and the realizations I've made during this past year.

When I was a young kid into my late teens, I was a competitive fencer. I trained about 3 hours, 3-5 days a week and then almost every day during the summers for ~ 8 hours. Even then, I would never consider myself thin but I was strong. My legs were pure and solid muscle (it was a good party trick in high school). But I was always a bit bigger than my other female teammates and my coach never forgot to remind me of that fact. He'd ask me to take extra runs to try and lose some extra weight. And I did what he said, but I just got stronger, not thinner.

The funny thing is, those words never bothered me back then. I was so healthy and fit, I could do whatever physical activity I wanted with ease. I was definitely one of the most fit girls in my PE classes. Because I was physically capable, I wasn't very concerned about my outward appearance.

What made me finally quit fencing the year before college is another long story, but it boils down to not dealing well with the pressures of competition plus very serious illnesses in my family. After I quit and was in college, I became sedentary. I would rarely workout except in small spurts. I loved walking and hiking so those were my main areas of fitness. Even then, because I was still relatively fit, I felt fine about myself be cause I could do the things I enjoyed. I never really had issues with my body image.

Then we had a family tragedy, my cousin's husband died only 12 days after their wedding. I was sent reeling into a 7 year long depression. It was the lowest point of my life and what little physical activity I did flew out the window. I stayed inside, watched TV all day, and isolated myself from my friends and family. But even during ALL of this, my body image was relatively positive.

However, after hearing exercise helps with depression, I wanted to get fit and I mistakenly tried to jump back into the activities I used to do when I was an athlete. I couldn't do anything, I was out of breath and having chest pains after walking briskly. Suddenly I looked in the mirror and every positive thought about my body was gone. I felt so ugly and terrible. I only got professional help in September of last year and currently, I am at my healthiest mentally.

What does this have to do with weight loss? I want to lose weight but even after getting into a calorie deficit and losing pounds, I felt no accomplishment or excitement and I still felt horrible about myself. I knew that I did not have a proper motivation and if this continued, I would not be successful. After a lot of soul-searching, I have realized that my body image is tied directly to what my body can achieve and how it performs. Because the scale is not my main motivator, I struggled setting long term goals for myself.

Good goal-setting for health apparently requires something achievable long-term along with an emotional reason for that goal. So my goal is this:

I want my body to be in a physical condition where I feel comfortable saying "Yes" to every request that comes my way. My sister wants to go swimming together? I'll say yes. My significant other wants to train for a half marathon? I'll say yes. My friend needs help moving boxes? It's a yes.

As soon as I made that switch, everything changed. Just today, I was able to run a few minutes without stopping and I wasn't feeling breathless! I finished my run and I couldn't help but fist pump the air in the middle of the trail haha. It's changed my entire outlook on this weight loss journey and it has allowed me to actually enjoy the experience.

tldr; The scale does not motivate me nor does losing pounds help confidence in my body image. I discovered that focusing on performance and ability and a ultimate goal of saying "yes" to any physical activity that comes my way has made my fitness journey achievable and enjoyable.

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Have you ever had to “start over?”

I started getting serious about my weight loss in March, when I weighed 193 pounds, started doing regular calorie counting on my own until May, when I joined noom at 184.8 pounds. Lowest weight I reached was 178.8 pounds on July first. My weight fluctuated throughout 179 for a while until I went right back to the 180s. I’m sure at first it was just normal fluctuations but then I had several days where I just ate like shit (family getting food from restaurants, my sister coming home with junk food, days where I just couldn’t stop eating or didn’t make the greatest choices, etc) so I’ve been in the high end of 183 for a while, weighing in at 183.2 today.

I’ve been “off the wagon” with noom for a while I guess, but really fell off end of July/early this month when I got my wisdom teeth out and got to experience the bliss of eating things like pudding and ice cream without counting calories or reading articles or anything, so of course I got used to not being in the noom mindset and I’ve been having difficulty getting back to it.

My noom app wanted me to celebrate 100 days of noom a few days ago and that was...rough...someone in my group chat mentioned that she lost 20 pounds in those 100 days, and while I’m super happy for her I’m obviously beating myself up about how terribly I’ve been doing. I know the weight loss journey isn’t linear, but it would be nice if it was!

I think it was easy for me to fall off since I was already feeling so discouraged and was starting to get into the “this isn’t worth it, you’ll never reach your goal weight or look how you want” mindset. I’m really struggling with getting back on it, especially now that I’m expecting my period soon, but I know I need to. I feel gross from how horribly I’ve been eating lately. I’ve asked my noom coach to reset me to week 1 so hopefully having that type of mental rewind will help me get back to it with the same energy and motivation I had in my first week!

Needing to start over is so embarrassing for me...I’ve been struggling with weight loss for a few years now (I’ve never made it as far as I have this go around though, and I’ve never taken it as seriously for as long either) but I really thought I had it this time :( I’m embarrassed and feel gross. Has anyone else had to start over? Is there anything you learned that helped you significantly when it was time to start over? Any words would help lol

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Weight loss tips for a college student stuck at home due to covid?

I’m a college student who has gained a considerable amount of weight since being stuck at home. I’m doing my semester online this fall and I’m not really sure what to do. My house is constantly stocked with tons of terrible junk food from my brothers and my mom bakes constantly and cooks huge dinners. The dinners are generally healthy and well rounded but I just can’t figure out how to stay on track. There’s no way I can count the calories in the food she makes. I already don’t eat breakfast, don’t drink anything that’s not zero calories, and I’ve been working on my binge eating issues. But I’m a relatively short woman so it’s so tough. I just need some tips for not snacking when you don’t leave the house and have all this food just steps away. Anything would be appreciated! (I already drink a ton of black coffee!)

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Losing weight without calorie counting

Hello! I have been losing weight without counting calories.

Just a quick 'about my weight loss journey' :

I've always struggled with food, typical body image issues caused by parents telling you to lose weight but never giving any education on how as well as never providing any healthier foods, naturally ended up getting into fitness and nutrition, lost weight, learned how to eat, how to work out, got pregnant, gained weight, lost most of pregnancy weight(keto and IF, of course calorie counting to ensure I hit my macros), ended up gaining 50lbs over the course of 2 years. Now we are here.

The weight gained occurred while I was TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT. I was counting calories. It hecked with my head, it made me obsess more over food, it gave me excuses to eat a horrible diet because "as long as it fits my calories" which led to more cravings, more binging..ugh. So I stopped trying to count calories. I went back to the first time I got into health and fitness. I ate mindfully. I started with small changes. Making low calorie swaps to help reduce calories without having to make much effort. I switched from regular coke to coke zero (it's closer to regular coke for those who don't like the taste of diet), I started using light mayo or miracle whip, sugar free coffee creamer, yasso frozen yogurt bars instead of ice cream, quaker crisps instead of chips, etc. I paid attention to hunger vs cravings. If I just finished a bowl of pasta and chicken an hour ago after a decent breakfast and I'm feeling "hungry" but all I've done today is throw in a load of laundry and watch youtube, I take that all into account and recognize I don't need food right now, my body is just used to having more than it needs. Quickly, certain foods became unappealing. Cookies almost immediately give me an upset stomach, I'm assuming due to the flour, sugar, vegetable oils, as I've stopped consuming(for the most part) flour, sugar and vegetable oils. They just don't make me feel good. Mindful eating guys. Not intuitive eating, mindful eating.

I started with this app called ATE

You don't count calories

You mindfully track your food by taking pictures of your meals when you're eating them to track how often you eat and how long you fast between meals, for each meal you can write notes and there are questions to answer like: Why did you eat? Where did you eat? What kind of food was it(homemade, prepackaged, etc.), etc. It helped start making better choices with my food, it allowed me to see when I ate from boredom, stress, socially, it allowed me to see how unbalanced my diet was

Mindful eating guys. If calorie counting is failing you, try it out.

Stats: 5'6" F 28

5/29/2020 209.4 lbs

8/14/2020 196.8lbs

12.6 lbs in 2.5 months without counting calories, maybe working out a few times a week. Mostly mindful eating.

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