!!WARNING!! This is a long read. Im very sorry in advance. I started typing and just let go. There’s also a lot of long questions, and I jump around a bit but this is my first time posting ever. I’ll be posting this in the main few subreddits I’ve lurked in for years.
23 year old male, currently 260lbs (sept 2021)
Well, I want to start off by saying this isn’t easy. I’ve been trying to lose weight for 7 years now, and have lurked and read subreddits on this forum for well over 2+ years. I always read people’s stories, or tips and tricks, etc. It always made me motivated to start losing weight but it’s been hard. I’ve tried and failed multiple times and actually lost like 30 at one point. But I never stick to it and never have the discipline to not eat. Im posting this in the subreddits I have lurked on for years to hopefully become a part of a new lifestyle with other people. Community is key.
Background info of my life you can skip, but I ask you don’t
I’ve been overweight my whole life, like many people on here. I started as a heavy kid with heavy parents. They always told me to finish my plate and always be full. Don’t get me wrong, I let myself get this way, I’m holding myself accountable for my actions. I just think the mindset they gave me bled into my mindset today. Anyways, around age 12-13 I noticed I was a little heavier than everyone else but it wasn’t a concern at the time. I was around 100lbs. It was around this time I got heavily into video games so all I would do is eat junk food and play video games (shocker, right?) I spent all my summers doing nothing but WoW, Call of Duty and the occasional nap. It got worse when I was around 16-17 I found the wonders of marijuana (Oh boy, the munchies!) So I spent most my time skipping class, getting high, playing video games and eating Dominos Pizza. Oh yeah I had the life! I eventually joined a weightlifting class at my high school for the last two years. I never got ripped but I could bench 265 3x rep max. I really loved the feeling of weightlifting and feeling myself get stronger and more in shape. After I graduated, sadly, I never lifted again. Even during weightlifting I ate and slept like shit so I was still overweight. This was my senior year so I was 18 and around 240, a little muscle but mostly fat. (Trust me, I didn’t need a BMI test to see what I looked like jumping up and down without a shirt). So after high school I took about 2-3 years off living with my parents. Can you guess what I did? Correct! Video games, weed, alcohol and lots and lots of eating. This went on for a few more years and I tried on and off dieting (none lasted more than a week) until around my 23rd birthday (January 2021) when … I fell into a depression…after realizing what my life had turned to, it really hit me. I was 23 years old, living with my parents, working a minimum wage job, no eduction above high school. I realize now that most of my life I was eating for comfort, I enjoyed how it made me feel and it was there for me. I was addicted to it.. I ate because it made me happy, then I would be depressed with being overweight so I would eat. It was a vicious cycle. I was way out of shape (300lbs at 23 years old) and I decided I’m finally gonna change and this time I’m 100% going to stick to it!! …kind of…
I ended up getting an apartment with my buddy and going to EMT school. I was feeling like I was accomplishing things in life! I graduated EMT school and decided it was time, yet again to try to work on my weight since I was on a natural high of life. I started by using the LoseIt App (which I have installed and uninstalled countless times) and just started very simple this time. Calories in, calories out.
(As I stated before, I did a lot of research over a long time + reading COUNTLESS subreddits and forums on advice. It was like..the knowledge was there, but the drive wasn’t.)
I kind of went crazy though with the calorie counting and decided I would just go super low (around 800-1000 calories a day). I know it wasn’t healthy trust me, but I was broke and so so mentally and physically tired of being overweight. I ended up hitting 240 after 6 months. (January 2021 - June 2021). I was feeling good, I weighed as much as I did in high school! But all I ate was gas station sandwiches and ramen. So I had lost health but I was still unhealthy and super out of shape (out of breathe going up a flight of stairs). I was once again unhappy with myself. It’s like…I lost some weight, but I still felt bad and still was heavy. I ended up moving in with my girlfriend (about 3-4 months ago) and it’s been great! I got a new job as a car salesman and I love it, I’m making decent money, enjoy my job, just paid off my car. Life has been great, only thing now is I’m noticing I’m putting weight back on. I decided to weigh myself last week and realized I was almost at 260. My bad eating habits are back and my girlfriend and I very bad about eating out. I’m almost in tears because I feel myself going back to how I was. Yes I don’t have time to eat and smoke all day like when I was in high school, but I still eat a lot of junk, processed food and super late at night.
Okay background story over, if you skipped, please continue below
This brings us to our current day me.
I am 23 years old. 260 pounds. Fighting my weight since I was 15. And guys? I can’t do this anymore. I can’t live like this. I’m tired of not being comfortable shirtless, I’m tired of feeling heavy and sluggish, I’m tired of how I look, I’m tired of how I can’t be the person I want to be. I will not die at a young age, or never life a fulfilling life due to my weight. I’m done this time. I’m so so tired and mentally done. My grandfather died from a heart attack when he was in his 50s. My father is very overweight and I fear I will lose him to it soon with his current issues. I just… I can’t do it. I can’t do it to myself or people around me any longer. I will not succumb to food and live in this fat flesh prison. This is MY BODY and MY LIFE and I’m taking control of it now!!! Fucking now!
My goal is to lose weight but do it healthily. I considered going to a nutritionist/dietician soon and finding out a good regimen for myself but decided to try you guys first! I have read about Keto diet, Paleo diet, Vegan, Vegetarian, Mediterranean. Blah blah. Way to much information overload… I know how to cook and I can meal prep. I just know that if I don’t meal prep, I’ll fall off the wagon. I want to have a balanced diet but also I want to do a lot of cardio (and eventually weightlifting again.) My end goal is eventually to be very healthy and honestly kind of ripped.
I always fall of the wagon though so I need people to hold me accountable and to help guide me, that’s where you guys come in. I want to find out how many calories I should truly eat a day, and possibly my macronutrients. I have a desk job, so I’m very inactive, but I wanna do some form of workout or even cardio. My main goal is to lose weight, but if muscle is built too, hey why not! I can only do at home workouts and cardio for the time being so maybe YouTube or something. There’s so much I want to know about eating right and weight loss, I just don’t know what to do! So before I make this god awfully long post even longer, let me wrap it up. Down below are my main questions. Instead of hiding and lurking on forums I’m finally bringing myself out to make a change. The change starts today.
23 year old male. 6 foot tall. 262 lbs.
- What should my daily caloric intake be around to lose weight fast but healthily?
- I wouldn’t mind trying a specific diet (Keto,Vegan,Paleo) that’s a lifestyle change and I have the drive to do it. I just need help with how many meals a day should I have?
- Also, how many meals a day would you recommend 3, 4, 5? I can meal prep easily I just need to find a diet plan to follow first, I can find recipes if I just know what macro nutrients to use each meal and how many calories per meal.
- What should my macro nutrients look like? I’ve heard 50/30/20 and 30/30/40. I just want to know what is best for me if I want to lose weight (but not be skinny fat) I wanna be fit too. Which kind of branches into the next question
- Would 2-3 days a week of HIIT workouts + a few days a week of cardio be too much? Like I said I have a sedentary lifestyle so it would only be a 30-40 min HIIT workout (2-3 days a week) and some light jogging/running for an hour (other 2-3 days).
- Is weightlifting or calisthenics good for losing weight? I have no weight set and I can’t go to the gym. I just need help making a diet plan for that type of fitness + a schedule. I’ll follow a schedule perfectly I’m just bad at making it. I just want exercise and healthy eating to start. (We can get swole later) I always overload myself with too much info and research that I can’t find what’s truly right for me. I just want to do what will truly work for me (What days do I work muscle groups, do I need more cardio, is my macronutrients good for maximum weight loss, etc). Too much info can be overbearing. My work schedule is the same 9-5 mostly so it’s easy to make a daily routine and schedule I just need help. I want get up at 6am and be in bed by 10.
Lastly, any and all advice is welcome!!Like I said, this was a lot for me to do this but I’ve finally come to the conclusion I can do it. Thank you so so much if you actually read all that, I spent 30 minutes pouring my heart into it and I know it was a lot trust me. However I’m finally ready to get on a good path to follow for the rest of my life and I think writing this all out will help. Have a wonderful day, and a beautiful tomorrow. - Matt
P.S if anyone wants to keep in touch for support for each other if you are also losing weight I’d be happy to help, I believe holding yourself accountable with someone can help. Even if you aren’t losing weight but you wanna help, or if you happen to know or even be a nutritionist or dietician and want to help, I would love it. Thank you!!