Saturday, December 22, 2018

Falling off the health train (and Christmas)

A bit of backstory. I started my weight loss trip (or more how I like to think about it, my journey to a better me) about 2 years ago. Then I was around 340 pounds. I knew I was overweight, but I don’t know it just sort of crept up on me over 25 years. Things went well for about 6 months or so, I lost around 100 pounds, and I felt great for it. I’d picked up walking about 6 miles a day around my small town a day as exercise, I felt like a new person, not where I wanted to be yet but I know its a journey and I was going in the right direction.

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Then about 18 months ago a few things happened that knocked me off course. The biggest is probably my sister had just lost her job and came to live with me for a bit while she figured what she wanted to do next. She eats more like how I used to, and I just slid into my old patterns. She did find her own place about 3 months later, but something had changed in me, I was back on my old path and I couldn’t seem to drag myself back to the right one. Secondly, the amount of travel for work increased a lot so about one week a month it felt like I was literally on a path of “eat anything to stop me feeling hungry, I’ll get back to eating properly when I get home“. Sadly, it seems I get home and don’t sort stuff out.

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Fast forward to now and I’ve put on about half of the weight I’ve lost, but the worst part is unlike when I was at my heaviest, I’m now hyper-aware of how unhealthy I’m being for this, and I hate myself for it. Like really hate myself. Judging by what my sister has been telling me, I’ve been constantly complaining, almost blaming her for the past year, even though I don’t realise it, and I hate myself for that too. Also my body just aches from all the crap combined with my daily walking for two years, so it feels like my body just wants me to stop and I don’t know, probably eat some more.

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Finally now it’s Christmas, I’m visiting my parents for a week who basically live off anything that has bread or fries strapped to it and that’s the last thing I want to think of. I like Christmas, and I want my family to enjoy it, just I don’t want to be that person complaining and ruining everything without realising. I just need to find the path I was enjoying so much before.

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Thanks if you’ve read up this far what feels a bit like a rant. I just wondered if anyone has felt they’ve been in this place before and have an idea how to get back on the right track, and how to survive Christmas without turning it into yet another "I'll just do that tomorrow".

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Day 1? Starting your weight loss journey on Saturday, 22 December 2018? Start here!

Today is your Day 1?

Welcome to r/Loseit!

So you aren’t sure of how to start? Don’t worry! “How do I get started?” is our most asked question. r/Loseit has helped our users lose over 1,000,000 recorded pounds and these are the steps that we’ve found most useful for getting started.

Why you’re overweight

Our bodies are amazing (yes, yours too!). In order to survive before supermarkets, we had to be able to store energy to get us through lean times, we store this energy as adipose fat tissue. If you put more energy into your body than it needs, it stores it, for (potential) later use. When you put in less than it needs, it uses the stored energy. The more energy you have stored, the more overweight you are. The trick is to get your body to use the stored energy, which can only be done if you give it less energy than it needs, consistently.

Before You Start

The very first step is calculating your calorie needs. You can do that HERE. This will give you an approximation of your calorie needs for the day. The next step is to figure how quickly you want to lose the fat. One pound of fat is equal to 3500 calories. So to lose 1 pound of fat per week you will need to consume 500 calories less than your TDEE (daily calorie needs from the link above). 750 calories less will result in 1.5 pounds and 1000 calories is an aggressive 2 pounds per week.

Tracking

Here is where it begins to resemble work. The most efficient way to lose the weight you desire is to track your calorie intake. This has gotten much simpler over the years and today it can be done right from your smartphone or computer. r/loseit recommends an app like MyFitnessPal, Loseit! (unaffiliated), or Cronometer. Create an account and be honest with it about your current stats, activities, and goals. This is your tracker and no one else needs to see it so don’t cheat the numbers. You’ll find large user created databases that make logging and tracking your food and drinks easy with just the tap of the screen or the push of a button. We also highly recommend the use of a digital kitchen scale for accuracy. Knowing how much of what you're eating is more important than what you're eating. Why? This may explain it.

Creating Your Deficit

How do you create a deficit? This is up to you. r/loseit has a few recommendations but ultimately that decision is yours. There is no perfect diet for everyone. There is a perfect diet for you and you can create it. You can eat less of exactly what you eat now. If you like pizza you can have pizza. Have 2 slices instead of 4. You can try lower calorie replacements for calorie dense foods. Some of the communities favorites are cauliflower rice, zucchini noodles, spaghetti squash in place of their more calorie rich cousins. If it appeals to you an entire dietary change like Keto, Paleo, Vegetarian.

The most important thing to remember is that this selection of foods works for you. Sustainability is the key to long term weight management success. If you hate what you’re eating you won’t stick to it.

Exercise

Is NOT mandatory. You can lose fat and create a deficit through diet alone. There is no requirement of exercise to lose weight.

It has it’s own benefits though. You will burn extra calories. Exercise is shown to be beneficial to mental health and creates an endorphin rush as well. It makes people feel awesome and has been linked to higher rates of long term success when physical activity is included in lifestyle changes.

Crawl, Walk, Run

It can seem like one needs to make a 180 degree course correction to find success. That isn’t necessarily true. Many of our users find that creating small initial changes that build a foundation allows them to progress forward in even, sustained, increments.

Acceptance

You will struggle. We have all struggled. This is natural. There is no tip or trick to get through this though. We encourage you to recognize why you are struggling and forgive yourself for whatever reason that may be. If you overindulged at your last meal that is ok. You can resolve to make the next meal better.

Do not let the pursuit of perfect get in the way of progress. We don’t need perfect. We just want better.

Additional resources

Now you’re ready to do this. Here are more details, that may help you refine your plan.

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Friday, December 21, 2018

I really want to lose the weight now. I'm going to start taking my weight loss seriously.

Alright then, today I weighed myself and I saw that I was 310 pounds. I haven't been this large in over 5 years when I went on my first journey of weight loss.

I found a woman 5 years ago that I loved so dearly that I would do anything and I will soon be moving in with her in the upcoming summer. However, in the time that we have been together, I now understand how much I have let myself go.

I feel so uncomfortable looking at myself in the mirror and I feel disgusting. However, I think it's been enough fucking time dwelling in the past. I am no longer 240 pounds.

If by this time next year I haven't lost at least 40 pounds, I will literally eat a shoe.

It's time for me to take my life a lot more seriously and my future health as well. If not for myself then for the people that I love, so that I can be there for them.

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[Daily Directory] Find your quests for the day here! - Saturday, 22 December 2018

Welcome adventurer! Whether you're new on this quest or are towards the end of your journey there should be something below for you.

Daily journal.

Interested in some side quests?

Community bulletin board!

If you are new to the sub, click here for our posting guidelines

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Also offering myself up for accountability messages

Just offering myself up to message anyone (let's start with up to 15 people) that would like someone to say something like "Have a great workout today" or "See you at the gym" or something along those lines.

A little about myself for content... I work out Monday through Saturday, and am happy to message on Sundays. I'm a 30 year old father to two little girls, living in Houston TX. I've recently lost 52 pounds tracking my macros and intermittent fasting, and I'm 8 pounds from my weight loss goal. If I can do it, I promise you can too.

Let me know how often you'd like a message (daily, thrice weekly, MWF etc). I'll put reminders in my phone for each person and send you a little note to tell you I'm rooting for you to work out today. (Credit for this idea goes to u/Fitchickinflorida)

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Someone told me today that I’m too intense.

I don’t know if this is the right sub, but I’ve been on a weight loss journey that allowed me to hit my goal in September. Since then I’ve maintained and added a weight training regimen 5 days a week and core 7 days a week. While training with a new trainer, he made the comment that I’m too intense and need to be more fluid. I had a physical therapist tell me something similar a few weeks ago. My husband just makes comments like ‘stop’..

It wasn’t until today that I actually asked someone (the trainer) ‘what does that mean?’ He replied that I’m not fluid in my motions, I’m clenching my face, I look on edge.

I’m looking for advice on how do i become less intense? Also this might be a warning for those who see or reach progress - reaching your goals and the desire to never go back can not only leave your facial expressions weird and your body poised for action, but may be creating stress internally driven by fear.

This sub has helped me more in the past 8 months than anyone can imagine. Keep it up - although be aware that things might not play out exactly like you thought when you’ve reached those goals!

TLDR; I’m turning into an intense, non fluid, weird expressioned, tense lunatic because I’m never going back but I’m not trying to kill myself from the stress of it all either.

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Sex and dating after 80 lb weight loss

Not sure if this is the most appropriate place to post this, so if not I'd appreciate someone pointing me in the right direction.

Anyway. I'm a 27 year old woman-----and a virgin. I'm not necessarily ashamed of my virginity, but I am tired of hanging onto it. I never had sex because A) I never really dated throughout high school and college due to my weight, which gave me crippling anxiety and self-esteem issues and B) I've never met anyone that I liked enough to sleep with. I've never been much of a partier, so there hasn't even been much opportunity for drunken night stands in my (currently non-existant) dating/sex life.

Fast forward to now. I've lost almost 100 pounds and for the first time since my teenage years, I feel attractive. I get attention from men that I haven't gotten in years. I recently joined Tinder (I know) and have met and talked with a number of guys. The trouble is, despite the weight loss, my body is still kind of a mess. My belly, though much smaller, still hangs over my waist. My arms are still flabby, though they're slowly becoming more toned. I look good in clothes, but I hate the way I look naked and I feel like it's sabotaging my chances with some of these guys I'm talking to, including one that I actually sort of really like.

I'm proud of myself and I know I did something amazing and the reason I did it (besides health reasons) was so that my weight wouldn't hold me back from doing the things I want to do. But here I am, wanting to be intimate with someone but too nervous that he'll judge me or reject me once I take my clothes off. I almost feel like I'm cat-fishing these guys because it seems to me that the person in my online photos is not the one I see naked in the mirror.

To be clear, I don't think I have any hang-ups with sex. I know that being a virgin at my age is unusual to say the least, but my previous weight was holding me hostage to the point where I couldn't imagine any man wanting me, so I just sort of let the years go by and never tried to meet anybod.

I know I'm rambling, but I'd really appreciate some advice.

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