Friday, December 21, 2018

Sex and dating after 80 lb weight loss

Not sure if this is the most appropriate place to post this, so if not I'd appreciate someone pointing me in the right direction.

Anyway. I'm a 27 year old woman-----and a virgin. I'm not necessarily ashamed of my virginity, but I am tired of hanging onto it. I never had sex because A) I never really dated throughout high school and college due to my weight, which gave me crippling anxiety and self-esteem issues and B) I've never met anyone that I liked enough to sleep with. I've never been much of a partier, so there hasn't even been much opportunity for drunken night stands in my (currently non-existant) dating/sex life.

Fast forward to now. I've lost almost 100 pounds and for the first time since my teenage years, I feel attractive. I get attention from men that I haven't gotten in years. I recently joined Tinder (I know) and have met and talked with a number of guys. The trouble is, despite the weight loss, my body is still kind of a mess. My belly, though much smaller, still hangs over my waist. My arms are still flabby, though they're slowly becoming more toned. I look good in clothes, but I hate the way I look naked and I feel like it's sabotaging my chances with some of these guys I'm talking to, including one that I actually sort of really like.

I'm proud of myself and I know I did something amazing and the reason I did it (besides health reasons) was so that my weight wouldn't hold me back from doing the things I want to do. But here I am, wanting to be intimate with someone but too nervous that he'll judge me or reject me once I take my clothes off. I almost feel like I'm cat-fishing these guys because it seems to me that the person in my online photos is not the one I see naked in the mirror.

To be clear, I don't think I have any hang-ups with sex. I know that being a virgin at my age is unusual to say the least, but my previous weight was holding me hostage to the point where I couldn't imagine any man wanting me, so I just sort of let the years go by and never tried to meet anybod.

I know I'm rambling, but I'd really appreciate some advice.

submitted by /u/Throwawayzzrfun
[link] [comments]

from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2AcD2ia

No comments:

Post a Comment