Encouragement for the guys...

The most important thing that comes out of your weight loss is being healthy and happy. All of those pictures of the "ideal" male form or what women/men find "most attractive" are total BS. I'm a writer and I looked up "normal looking guys" for a character description and it broke my damn heart. Almost every pic was related to an article of how you're 'supposed' to look. Pages and pages of jaws that can cut glass and washboard abs that could shred cheese. It was absolutely absurd and unrealistic. Being healthy and happy is what makes a big difference in attractiveness. Don't let unrealistic standards get in your way.

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NSV: Giving Away Clothes

I still have a long way to go in my weight loss journey, but today I went through my entire dresser and my entire closet. I tried on everything. Things that fit went back from whence they came. Things that didn't fit went into one of two piles: 1) give away or 2) save because I love it. The piles were about the same size. The clothes that are too small that I love went into a box in the garage. I posted the giveaway clothes online and gave them away free.

The victory? Some of the clothes were too big!!!

I'm trying to lose weight postpartum. I gained a little while we were trying to conceive and a lot during pregnancy. After the baby came, I lost about 30 pounds rapidly without effort, but then I stalled. My maternity clothes were too big and all got packed away, so I wasn't wearing maternity anymore, but my clothes were still big. I'm bigger than I want to be. I'm still overweight (BMI 29.2 today) and want to get back to the healthy range. I've only lost about 5 pounds since I stalled, but I'm improving enough that I was able to give away some clothes that were too big and aren't maternity. It wasn't a lot, but it was something.

And now my dresser and my closet feel roomy!

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Under 200 for the first time in years!

Like many people I (M, 36, 5'11) put on a bunch of weight during Covid. My wife and I had our first kid in 2020 and I was stuck in a terrible job that left me constantly stressed and sleep deprived. I have never been super fit, but since college (when I was around 175) I've fluctuated in the 180-200 range. Over the course of 2020 and 2021 my weight just ballooned up to a max of around 230, by far the heaviest I've ever been. I basically did nothing for 2021 and the first half of 2022, fluctuating in the 220-230 range before getting serious about getting back in shape around August of this year. I clocked in this morning at 199, the first time seeing a 1 at the front of the scale since 2020.

What finally worked for me was getting into an exercise program I liked (I started boxing), everything else seems to have flowed from that. Even though most of the actual weight loss has come from diet, it's the exercising that's making it easier to eat better. I'm finding myself making smarter/healthier choices not because I'm trying to lose weight (though I am), but because I know that I'll feel way better for my next boxing class if I'm eating well vs if I'm slamming down junk. Hard to put in my all in a class if I was drinking the night before or if I was pigging out on junk food, but if I am eating right I feel so much better in class. The boxing itself is also helping, I feel way fitter and stronger.

Still quite a ways to go (I'd love to be back at my college weight before my birthday in early 2023) but I wanted to take a minute and enjoy this mini milestone.

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Why is it so difficult?

I feel like I’ve tried everything, which would be an exaggerating but I’ve been from weight loss programs and saw success; which lead to gaining all the weight back plus more. I’ve done meal replacement shakes and everything else i can think of. I’m this close to going back to these restrictive diet plans in order to reach my goal, only because I don’t know if I can do it on my own. I don’t know how to get in a calorie deficit or what’s required to keep the motivation going throughout the weight loss journey. I’ve bought endless cookbooks for weight loss but I still find it difficult to accomplish, I attempted to do keto and I don’t understand the basics of keto because it seems too complicated to understand

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Calorie counting as main method for weight loss

For those who use CICO as their main method to lose weight (i.e. they don’t do much exercise and rely on eating foods to maintain a somewhat substantial caloric deficit), how many months did you reap the benefits of this for? How many months until you plateaued? I’m a female in my early twenties with a somewhat active job on my feet for 12+ hours a day 4 days a week and generally use walking as my main form of transport. Aside from this I don’t really exercise but am seeing results on the scale just by restricting my calories. My main concern is that this method won’t help with my weight loss journey for more than a few months and I’ll eventually have to adapt to a new system that works for me (which is hard lol)

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Many of you probably already know this, but, you may want to turn off calorie bonus if you have a connected Fitbit.

I’ve been using loseit for a few weeks and realized the calorie bonus option is giving me WAY too many calories.

The calorie budget based on my estimated current level of activity (TDEE) already accounts for… my activity.

Fitbit was then adding additional calorie budget on top of my calculated TDEE. Also, Fitbit is overestimating my calories burned each day by around 500!

Based on my average weight loss rate, the TDEE estimate is pretty close to my actual/calculated TDEE. So I just turned off the ability for Fitbit to write data to loseit and am personally happier with that settings configuration.

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Getting past a mental block at a specific weight

TL/DR Advice needed to get past mental block and stick with healthy weight loss behaviors once I reach a “trigger” weight (which is still obese) and stop another yo-yo

I have been a yoyo dieter my whole life. I have lost anywhere from 50-70 pounds before (3 or 4 times as an adult) and have gained it back plus some.

1. when I start looking good and making progress, I think “if only I decreased calories more or exercised more I would look better and make more progress” leading me to eat stupidly low calories or excessively exercising and burning myself out

2. hitting a plateau, getting frustrated, decrease calories or increase exercise and burn myself out

3. getting so obsessed with the number on the scale and daily weigh ins, that my daily mood is affected; upset and angry when my weight doesn’t decrease, even though I know daily fluctuations are normal as are weekly fluctuations due to hormones, salt intake, change in exercise, etc.

Since February of 2022 I have been back on a weight loss/health routine. To this point, I have lost about 60 lbs with sustainable lifestyle changes (CICO, healthy eating, occasional treats, some cardio and weight training, tracking food and weight only to the extent that it doesn’t affect my mood and my progress). I am very proud of the progress I have made so far, and I thank this subreddit (where I’ve been lurking for a few months) for providing inspiration. All of your positive vibes, supportive statements and suggestions and information is so valuable.

Accurate or not, the weight of about 175 pounds is the point at which I think my previous weight loss attempts have failed, where all of the excessive and unhealthy things I did to lose the weight caught up to me and I gave up. 175 at my height (5’3”) is still obese. That number may be all in my head, but I am getting closer to that number, and I am already thinking about it and trying to be proactive and plan strategies so that I continue to be healthy and not fail again.

Other than just telling myself to “stick with the program”, are there any strategies you can think of to get me through and past the mental block I have at that weight? I was thinking of doing a planned maintenance break when I got to about 175 but not sure if that’s a good idea. I could start tracking macros/protein but that sounds like no fun and ripe for obsessiveness. My number of steps per day outside of exercise is low (desk job) so not sure how to go about improving that (I don’t use the under desk bicycle I have, I find it annoying), and also seems like no fun or not something that would get me past my trigger point here. A new, non-weight related goal might be helpful here at this time…. just not able to come up with one.

Any ideas you can share would be greatly appreciated and sorry if this post is really long! Thanks for your input and I wish you well wherever you are on your journey!

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