How to break out of the cycle of regaining the weight you've lost?

24F, 5'6, 71kg

Last summer I was in one of the best shapes of my life, about 63kg. I was working out a lot and eating well. Just a few months ago I was at a place where I was genuinely happy with my body, I could have lost maybe 3 more kilos to get to my official "goal" but given I had a good bit of muscle I was okay with where I was at. I felt good in all my clothes, everything in my wardrobe either fit or was a bit big.

I moved homes, that threw me off the gym for a bit and worked an incredibly stressful job for a brief period. In just a few short months I completely unravelled my hard work and gained about 7-8 kilos. I'm now considered overweight and a lot of my clothes no longer fit me.

It's a lot of weight in a short time and I was shocked because I really didn't think I eat *that* much. I don't eat breakfast, quite often skip lunch too (at my job I was too stressed or busy to bother with lunch) but of course by evening I'd be hungry and crabby and I'd overeat by a lot. Plus the fact i was often too tired/stress for the gym and my sleep was terrible. When I get honest with myself and really thought about my habits, it's not that surprising. It was a series of small, bad choices that tallied up.

I'm now back on it, in a good swing with the gym and have changed up my eating habits but I feel so disheartened. Am I doing all of this just to look good for a few months and then have to do it all over again? My mile time is now a minute slower than just a few months ago. I was deadlifting 80kg, I could just do a pull up and I could run a mile in under 8 minutes. I feel trapped in this endless cycle where I get slim and fit in the first half of the year, feel good for a while, and then it's like I blink and I'm overweight again and my fitness is back to square one.

How do people stay consistent over a long period of time? Until about 21-22, I was naturally slim (56-60kg) and never had to try too hard to be a healthy weight. Since then I've been in this weight loss and regain cycle and I'm worried it will just get worse as i get older.

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january doesn’t count

this is gonna be long and rambling for absolutely no reason but tldr: after ~4 months of giving in to all my lizard brain impulses i seemingly, unexplainably only gained 5.5 lbs. i also get to tuck january away mentally like it never happened and start fresh in february.

i haven’t been on track in any sense for months now. i let everything get away from me the end of last year and completely gave up. even when i was eating in i would have a toasted, buttered bagel with french fries for dinner 🥴 but then i gave that up and went back to doordash every night. i also started a new job the beginning of this year and my daily step count and general daily activity has decreased.

then my accountability partner (not for weight loss but for setting goals and being responsible adults) and i decided that january doesn’t count and we will pick back up in february. so now it’s about to be february and mentally i’m ready to take some responsibility for myself. i physically and mentally feel like trash. i’m significantly bloated every night, i’m not sleeping well, i’ve wasted an embarrassing amount of money, i’m struggling to get out of bed. i genuinely thought this new job would make everything else fall into place for me and i would find boundless energy. apparently you continuously have to work for things you want and mental health issues that are being avoided don’t just go away 🤔

i have a lot of goals and ideas for how i want this year to be and it will be good to write everything down, prioritize, and check in once a week with my friend. with all that said i finally weighed in today to prepare myself and somehow i’m only up 5.5 lbs. my last weigh in was october 11 at 147 lbs and today i’m 152.5 lbs. (i’m 5’6) all my clothes have stopped fitting properly so i assumed it had to be closer to 10 or 15 lbs. i’m thinking the way i carry weight is what’s making mostly bras and pants not fit right or not at all. other possibilities include body dysmorphia and scale malfunction. either way i’m gonna go with the 5 lbs for now because it’ll help me stick with my goals.

ANYWAY if you started in january and fell off or never got momentum in the first place it doesn’t even matter because january doesn’t count!! 🥳🥂

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Approaching Recurrent Stumbling Block

37 years old, female

Start Weight : 215lbs

Current Weight : 176lbs

Goal Weight : 155lbs

Hello!

This is more of a shout into the void than anything, but any advice is appreciated too!

So everytime I get to 175lbs, which has been a few times over the years, my body seems to “settle” and weight loss becomes harder and I usually take my foot off the gas and get back to 185lbs or so before starting CICO again and the cycle repeats.

Eating between 1400 and 1800 calories a day and I know this is a mental thing but I just can’t seem to get to the 160s!

Trying to stay motivated this time!

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lifestyle not a diet

started my weight loss journey and it’s going well. a lot of my habits are changing for the better and while yes I’m really proud of myself for essentially turning into a healthy person with healthy habits, I still find myself wanting more. sometimes I struggle not giving back in to old habits (restricting and binging).

idk how to explain it, the slow and gradual (healthy) weight loss just never feels rewarding enough? I feel so much more accomplished when I lose very quickly. Realistically I know I’m doing the right thing, making lifestyle changes instead of yo-yo dieting but sometimes I just don’t feel accomplished. There’s this voice in my head that goes “Good job on losing 1lb/week but remember the time you lost 20lbs in a month? Shouldn’t you be trying harder?”. I really just want that voice to shut up. I just try to remind myself that it wasn’t sustainable and I gained all back anyway.

not sure where I’m going with this but even though I’m making progress it never feels good enough for me, even though objectively I’m hitting my goals. it’s weird. feels like the weight loss doesn’t really count if I’m not at my gw overnight (which is stupid and irrational, I know).

I feel like a fraud sometimes because I’ve done so much work to be a healthier person and change my dietary habit for the better but I still won’t be skinny for a while bc my starting weight was so high. so I just think, why not speed up the process? but internal i fight with myself because i want to lose weight healthily this time, i dont want to be miserable and have brain fog all day because im running on 500 calories! but also i just can't wait to be skinny? im still goin to be in the overweight bmi by next year if i dont speed things up a bit you know?

idk what im saying i just had to get this off my chest. if anyone has any similar feelings or had dealt with this, id like to hear it.

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Trying to understand Fitbit with LoseIt (Target Burns)

Perhaps this is a stupid and obvious question, but - why does my target burn (mainly BMR I believe) not contribute to my [energy in - energy out] calculation? If I am naturally burning X, and eating Y, shouldn't I only need to do extra exercise when Y exceeds X in order to achieve weight loss? Why is that chunk of burned calories through BMR being tossed aside?

Because my LoseIt says I'm over budget, but a napkin calcution between what LoseIt says I ate and FitBit says I'm burning shows a decent deficit (details below)

Presumably I need to change my LoseIt budget, but to what? It's at 5500kj/1300cal atm. Can I change my FitBit "target burn" from 10,000kj/2400cal to lower, even 0, so that ALL my burn (BMR + exercise) is subtracted from what I eat, and aim for a solid deficit total as a goal, rather than trying to balance it?

Maybe I should I swap programs, or swap watches?

/// // /

The long version, in case I'm making no sense and people want to figure out how I got here 😅:

(Just FYI Im rounding my kj -> calorie conversion just to keep things simple, so don't read too much into the specifics of my numbers.)

I've been using LoseIt for a month and seen slow but steady progress by keeping my "net" at 5500kj/1300cal (I'm very tall), by burning off any extra I ate over that limit using their manual exercise options. Simple, straightforward. You eat, you burn, and you balance those near 0 on LoseIt so your body is always in a deficit due to your BMR being higher.

Then I purchased a fitbit and found my "moderate" exercise levels were actually "light" exercise according to fitbit (dangit), so I havent been burning quite as much as I hoped, hence the very slow weight loss. But now I'm not sure I have it set up right.

For example, yesterday the fitbit recorded I burnt 12,000kj/2850cal, and I ate 8500kj/2000cal. So, I believe I was in a deficit of (eaten - burnt =) 3500kj/850cal. Hooray, right? However, on LoseIt, the FitBit has only credited me with 1900kj/450cal, meaning I am still OVER budget by 1100kj/250kj.

The discrepancy is due to the "target burn" on fitbit, which is 10,000kj/2400cal. As I understand, that's auto-calculated from my BMR, and that does align with most BMR calculators given my height, weight and activity level. But that means I am still burning more than I consumed before I exercised, yet I have to exercise for hours more to meet my budget.

I did try lowering my goal in the FitBit app down to 9000kj/2150cal but that didn't change anything in LoseIt.

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Period Worsens With Weight Loss

Hi! I’m 16F and my starting weight was 160. I’m 5’7 and although I’m now in the normal weight range (says my dr) for my height. She’s also recommended me losing a bit more weight. I’m currently 153 pounds. My periods before was not at all painful or heavy. They were very regular , every 26 days and light cramps on the first day and were 4-5 days long. Now they’re almost 6 days long, and painful and just a bit heavier. I’m not sure what to do. I want to lose the weight, but I’m not sure how to handle this.

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is there anything that would help

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Self awareness is huge

Hey everyone. I just wanted to start by saying that I love hearing the success stories, the progress, and even the worries. Success stories show that you can do it, progress is inspirational, and the worried times mean that you care!

Sharing something I've experienced/am still going thru, is that self awareness is a massive key to long-term success.

If you constantly look at yourself as anything but what and where you really are, are you really succeeding? Hard to say either way, but here are a few things I have been doing to try and stay self aware:

1. Remind yourself every day that you are human, and flaws come naturally. No one is perfect, nor will anyone ever be. Look at where you are in your journey, and really let it sink in. How did you get there, and what's next?

2. Keep goals that are achievable. I'm not a professional athlete, or anything close, and I imagine most of you aren't either. Setting and meeting goals that make sense in the short term, will only help. Your mindset, your energy level, and even your overall mood will be enhanced by meeting goals; so why not keep them simple?

3. Consistentcy is huge, and I don't mean on the same schedule. Did you complete your exercises for the week, but not on the same timeline as last week? Great! You still completed that goal, so be satisfied. Did you stay in a deficit, but maybe had a day with too much fat and not enough protein one day? Still gonna lose lbs. We really overthink certain aspects of weight loss, yet the process really is simple.

4. People are different. Some of us have issues that either slow down or almost halt our weight loss, and that sucks. All you can do is keep going, and stay motivated. Even if you didn't drop a pound or even gained a pound, don't be discouraged. I know I don't lose weight quickly, and that's the case for most; just gotta keep pushing.

5. Be truthful. Honesty with yourself and with your close family/friends is major. If you tell people you're in a deficit, or you workout every day, or whatever else; yet you are really taking in 4000 calories and sitting on the couch, you're doing no favors for yourself. Being truthful will make you check yourself, and even though it may be depressing for a moment, you'll realize just where you're at, and what needs to be done.

Maybe I come off as a moron, but I say all of this with good intentions and some experience. I fail, almost daily, to stay 100% focused and on track. It's so hard to avoid certain foods, and easy to put off working out. But, if you can stick to it, as hard as it may be, you'll really find out just how amazing life can be, if you realize who you are and what you can become.

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