I am refereeing my friends' weight loss contest. How to help my friends?

My two bff's are kings of trash talk and bet on EVERYTHING under the sun and now they wanna see which one of them can lose the most weight. Both are men, under age 40, physically active (walking, climbing stairs, etc) but carry about 100# extra weight each. Contest runs from now till July 1st, with monthly weigh-ins. Money is on the line, but so is bragging rights.

I did a hedge: I'm not a participant, but I put $100 into their pot. If neither of them loses at least 10#, I get the whole pot, otherwise, my $100 goes to whoever wins. I don't really want to win, I just wanted to motivate them and keep them from flaking out.

Question is, what else can I do to help? IDK if getting more people on the hedge side will be motivating (more $$) or demotivating (people betting that you will fail). Should I just step back and see what happens? Is six months too long a time, should we have done this as a monthly contest instead? Has anybody ever done something like this, and how did it go?

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2020 is the year I will take things slow and steady to succeed for my health!

So I have been trying to lose weight since the age of 13 so I was in the 8th grade.

During my try I would lose weight and gain it back.

The thing was I would starve myself and binge eat bad.

I have always had a bad relationship with food since I was 5.

But became more aware of it when I started my weight loss journey.

I did mention to my family that i think i have a eating disorder but they just told me to learn how to fix it.

It felt like they wasn't concern so I stop being concern about it.

I put it in the back of my mind and stop my weight lost journey for three years.

2012 I was 16 and newly diagnosed with pcos so I decided to go back to weight loss journey.

I started losing weight I went from 359 to 340, 340 to 330 one time to 321 but I would yo-yo weight form 2012-2014.

My mental health was getting worse the pressure of losing weight was to much so I had to put my journey on hold.

(To be honest from middle school though high school I was just losing weight to have the improval of my peers and society I wasn't doing it for my health.)

At 18 I started therapy I learn I had major depressive disorder and severe anxiety disorder.

I saw my therapist for four years but all we talk about was depression I tried to open up with my concern that I think I have an eating disorder and some other problems but she would shoot me down nicely.

She would say "its possible you have a eating disorder I can see it and the other concerns but we're here for depression."

"Bedsides once you handle your depression everything else will follow."

And I just follow what she said.

At 23 I now know she was wrong and wasn't right for me but I am thankful to her because she did help me mature in the mind set and help me improve my relationship with my parents.

My depression went down I wasn't depressed anymore so I decided to get back on it.

But everything would fail I couldn't stay motivated or consistent.

No matter how much I tried I kept making the same mistakes.

But I couldn't see my wrongs.

I thought maybe I couldn't do this alone and I needed a partner to "hold my hand" though this journey.

That I couldn't do this alone.

No matter what I did I had failures after failures and I was pretty hard on myself so I stop.

Every time I hear about weight lost stories I always heard people say they had this desire to change that was so powerful it started the chain reaction to losing weight.

I knew I wanted to change for the better but I didn't have that desire.

Changing myself for the better wasn't a priority.

I felt lost for a long time.

I felt like I was just existing and not living.

But then in July 2019 I had a overwhelming desire for change.

But I was confused with these new found feelings.

And i still didn't do anything for it.

But try to look for answers.

oddly though the desire grew.

December 2019 I had this awaking.

I one day woke up and decided to be brutality honest with myself.

I had to admit to things about myself that hurt but it was my truth.

My weight lost journey didn't work because I wasn't giving it my 100%

Yeah middle school though high school I wasn't educated on nutrition etc...

But at 20 I knew what I needed to do I just didn't do it because I didn't want to.

I was using my mental illness and medical conditions as a clutch on why I can't do this.

I was putting unrealistic goals and pressure on to myself.

I wasn't patient, consistent or motivated.

I was ignoring my unhealthy relationship with food and the ed I know I have.

And I didn't think I could do this alone.

And I was looking for cheat ways.

I also realized I was using my health problems as a punishment for allowing my depression to get so far it rewired how I think and did.

After realizing this I started to fully forgive myself.

I know see my failures as a detour.

I know I can do this by myself but I also know I will need support but I can't expect some one to hold my hand and help me finish the race.

This is my journey alone no one else.

I started working on a small routine on dec 9th to combat my depression instead of waiting to 2020 like I usually do.

And tomorrow I will be getting a eating journal so I can start logging what I eat, how much eat and how my emotions were when I ate.

So 2020 is the year I will work on good habits so I can combat my weight lost and other issues so I can me healthy physically and mentally.

Thanks for reading ❤

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I want to Love Myself in 2020

So new year, new me? That’s what they say right? I know it’s pretty cliché since most people’s New Year’s Resolutions are to lose weight, but I’m not here for a fad diet for a quick fix, but rather I want to actually lose weight PROPERLY, to better myself both mentally and physically... and with the start of a new year, this is the best chance at a new start right?

I’m 17. For most my life I have struggled with my weight/body image and felt I could never really accept myself in my body. Coming from an Asian background where looks are pretty much everything didn’t help either. Being told by relatives about how ‘fat’ you look or how much ‘prettier’ you’d be when you ‘lose weight’ isn’t exactly the nicest feeling ever. And of course being the naive teen I was, I would turn to crash diets which of course didn’t work and instead started a vicious cycle of binging/dieting. What didn’t help at all was the same family members poking/making fun of every time I would properly try and get my health on track, wondering when my next diet phase would happen which of course lead me becoming de-motivated and feeling as though I would never be worth anything unless I was skinny.

I’ve tried dieting on and off since I was 14. 3 years later and I’m 190lbs. This is the heaviest I’ve ever been. For someone who is 5’5 and a small bone structure, I can not only SEE the weight gain, but also FEEL it.

I kept wondering to myself WHY couldn’t I succeed in losing weight? WHY did I keep on failing? When finally a couple reasons seemed to hit me:

1) The times I tried to lose weight before wasn’t for me but for other people. Trying to lose weight for the sake of others will never work out. If I want to lose weight, I have to want it for myself.

2) Crash diets don’t work. A quick fix will never lead to a sustainable, healthy weight loss.

3) The weight I had to lose wasn’t just on my body, but on my mind. I didn’t realise but I had a lot of deep rooted anxieties and issues that I hadn’t dealt with and had just repressed, which resulted in me using food as a comfort when I felt alone.

But now that I’ve realised my mistakes and had time to accept my emotions and let myself allow to heal, I want to lose weight for myself. Not just for (obvious) physical health reasons but also for my mental health. I want to be at a position where I practice feeling happy and accept the body that I’m in while also improving it. I want to be able to look in the mirror and LOVE what I see. I’ve wasted a lot of my life already shying away from opportunities/experiences because of my insecurities about my weight and thus, not being able to fully enjoy myself.

I know I’m still young and I have a lot to live for, hence I want to be able to life my life to its absolute fullest! I want to be able to learn how to love myself both physically and mentally. So hopefully sharing my story/experiences with likeminded people will help me in my journey.

Hopefully, in a year’s time I can look back and see the amount of progress I have made :)

So in this new decade, I hope no matter what our goals, we can all learn to love ourselves :)

‘Love Yourself, Love Myself’ — Kim Namjoon

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Slow weight loss is good too

Am I perfect at sticking to my diet? No. Do I exercise regularly? No. But do I give it my best try every day? Also no.

Every little bit helps though. I do what I can, when I can and it's adding up. This time last year I weighed 220 lbs as a 5'7" person. This morning I weighed 160. I haven't been near this weight since at least 2015.

It's hard seeing others lose weight quickly. But this is how I am able to do it, and that's ok. When I started my weight-loss journey, again, my goal was to lose enough weight by the summer so my thighs wouldn't chafe and bleed.

Now I want to lose more fat and put on some muscle, not because I hate myself anymore, but because I want better for myself. It's a shift in thinking I never thought I'd have towards myself. And though I've never posted here, this sub has taught me lots.

So to everyone losing weight slowly; it matters and you've got this.

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F/25/5’6’’ [~270 > 128 < ~150 = 120 lbs lost] (~2 years to lose, 5 years maintaining): With the surge in visitors due to New Years Resolutions, I thought I would share my own progress to motivate others who are where I started!

Hello all,

​

Before and After Photo can be found here!

​

First, many apologies for the wall of text, but most people like detail so here it is! How I lost (ultimately) 142 lbs without surgery or any medical supervision with diet and later on exercise! I’ve been a lurker-turned active member of the /r/loseit and /r/progresspics community for over 6 years now, and both of these subs were absolutely integral to my weight loss and continued maintenance. From these forums, I learned SO much about nutrition and different strategies for making your weight loss journey work for you, and furthermore I saw real examples of people who were just like me that were also succeeding. It showed me I wasn’t a hopeless case.

​

In December of 2012, I was in my first semester of school at the University of Pennsylvania. I had tried losing weight all throughout high school and was wildly unsuccessful (to the point where I was gaining about 20 lbs per year). I can still remember vividly how embarrassed and out of place I felt at Penn—an obese girl, also first generation/low income at an Ivy. It wasn’t the space made for me. The tipping point for me was this image, shown in one of my anthropology classes. I remember seeing the look of disgust on my classmates’ faces… and I weighed even more than the woman in the picture! I was 18 years old, and I was literally signing my late adulthood away with my lifestyle choices. It finally clicked for me, that I needed to make a huge change if I wanted a healthy future for myself.

I know I weighed about 270 lbs when I went in for my pre-university physical and vaccinations back home during the summer, but I bet my highest weight was probably higher because I went wild with the unlimited dining hall food and Wawa hoagies. The first thing I started doing was cutting out bagels. That's it. I used to eat three just for breakfast. This was the first time that I had chosen to do something and stuck with it. I also started logging calories, just to learn how to do it. I didn’t enforce any limit or anything. I knew it was more important to institute small changes that I could sustain for a long time, and not overwhelm myself. This gave me a picture of what I was doing to myself (upwards of 4000 calories a day) and showed me where I could cut down.

In the summer of 2013, I stayed in Philly to work got a bike. I also went vegetarian. Biking was the first “exercise” I did (really though, I was going maybe 3 miles total) and vegetarianism was solely for the fact that I could cut out calories and unhealthy fast foods. This was right at the cusp of the “health food craze” and fast casual dining, so healthy fast food wasn’t really accessible at the time. And if you’re vegetarian, what are you going to order when you go to McDonalds? It just made it easier to say no. This was when things really started to change when it came to my perspective and my lifestyle. I think I lost about 15-20 pounds that summer, but I wasn’t actively trying to hit any goals.

Once the school year started, I was off a dining plan so I started cooking for myself —only buying fresh fruits and veggies, tofu, hummus etc. and turned to dark chocolate Hershey kisses because there was 9 in a serving and that felt more satisfying to me than one slice of cake (my brain is all about quantity). At the end of 2013, I was down around 70 lbs overall just from changing my food choices. Yes, you read that correctly, I lost a great deal of my weight without exercise! In January of 2014, I decided I wanted to start being active, and I also stopped drinking pop. I started the C25K program (which WORKS, I highly recommend it! Check out /r/C25K if you want to know more) with a close friend who kept me accountable. When I started, I couldn't even run for a minute straight. I ran my first 5K without stopping at the end of Week 5 (of 8). I only lost 10 lbs doing C25K, but it was all about body recomp. I gained a lot of muscle, to the point where before and after C25K I had shed almost 10 inches off my waist.

​

In July of 2014, I was 100 lbs down and I left for Australia to study abroad. I knew that I had 6 months where I could really make some progress or get behind from all the work I had done. So, I decided to make some progress. I took up distance running more seriously, and completed a 10K. I also seriously took up MyFitnessPal and kept my intake at 1200 a day, cut out all breads (but not carbs!) and processed foods, and limited any oils consumption.

​

The remainder of the weight came from running, and also doing archaeological fieldwork (aka digging lots of dirt for 8 hours a day), and weightlifting (I got seriously into heavy lifting, and started with the StrongLifts 5x5 program for any who want an easy place to start). I will be very honest — yes, I did gain some weight back during my ~5 years maintaining. However, this was very intentional, and I would do it again! Ultimately, I ended up losing 142 lbs in just over 2 years and hit a low weight of 128 lbs. I realized very quickly that the lifestyle I had to maintain to keep myself at this weight was so unsustainable and would not work long-term. I was running 3 miles a day, and eating around 1,400 calories daily. I knew that life would eventually get in the way of maintaining a strict exercise regimen (and that’s the issue, it was strict). Also, 128 on my frame made me look sick and malnourished. Today I fluctuate between 145-150, wear a size 4 jean, and size Small shirt. I love how I look, and my body can do all the things I want it to do, I don’t restrict the foods I eat, and I’m happy. Each of those 20 lbs was worth my sanity.

​

For all those who are wondering, yes, I had a LOT of loose skin. Mostly on my arms, legs, and stomach. In the Spring of 2016, just 2 days after walking the stage at graduation, I underwent a triple surgery in one sitting—abdominoplasty, brachioplasty, and leg skin removal surgery by the fantastic Dr. Cross in Philadelphia. His work is acclaimed, his testimonials are fantastic, and it’s all for a reason. From the get-go he was kind, attentive, sensitive to the fact I was uncomfortable with my body, and just all around a great doctor. He clearly knew what he was doing, his staff all had nothing but kind things to say. Furthermore, he was completely supportive before, during, and after the surgery—even taking the time to call the night before, the night after, and a few weeks after the surgery. I honestly cannot recommend him and his team enough, he is absolutely fantastic and a true expert.

​

Yes, the triple-procedure was pretty extreme, but I was informed of the reasoning (i.e. I was young, healthy, and didn’t need muscle reconstruction done in my abdomen) and he said that if there was *any* sign of complication he would wake me up, no hesitation. Yes, it was as bad as you can probably imagine. I went under the knife for 5 hours (about an hour less than I was told it would take). My procedure went completely smoothly, and I was told I did a brilliant job. If you want to see the before, after, and progress from this procedure, please refer to [1] these [2] two posts. I'm also very happy to answer any questions regarding the surgery so pm if you have any questions!

edit: missed a hyperlink

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How to stay motivated with slow weight loss

Hey all: throughout my adult life I've been continually gaining and losing the same 25-30 pounds. The only way I know how to lose is through major crash diets where I drop the weight over 2-3 months. Obviously that's not something that I want to do for the rest of my life, so I'd like to move toward a more gradual method of weight loss. The problem is that I need to see the scale moving to keep me motivated. I'm worried that if the weight loss slows considerably I'll lose my motivation and revert to bad habits. As with most weight loss issues, I know what to do, I just am not sure how to make myself do it. Does anyone have experience switching from a crash dieting method to a slower and more sustainable weight loss, and does anyone have any tips?

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Getting refocused and reenergized for 2020! Two weeks is long enough for eating and drinking everything under the sun

I’ve basically been eating and drinking everyday since December 20th after months of successful weight loss of 50lbs. I feel like crap, my skin looks dull, I feel bloated and uncomfortable, face is starting to get puffy, and y’all know the rest. It’s time to get back on track! I’ve been off almost 2 solid weeks with no working out either. I know I am up some pounds but I am trying to stay calm and get refocused and utilize those extra calories I consumed for an extra pump in my workouts 💪. I am not weighing myself right now. I will plan to weigh myself after 2 weeks of eating normal and getting used to working out again. I have always gotten overwhelmed this time of year in the past and just blew it off thinking “well I’ve been eating for weeks, you’re just too far gone to fix it.” I would get too focused on the big picture and not focus on small sustainable goals that ultimately add up to big successes! That changes this year! I have created healthy habits and I can tell they are working because eating unhealthy for so long is making me feel blah. I didn’t used to notice that blah feeling but now I can feel it and I don’t like it! I guess I’m just trying to put good vibes or energies or whatever out into the universe to refocus my noggin and get back in the groove of things! Here’s to 2020 folks!

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