Lifestyle change to better my mental health, lost 20 lbs in 2 months and I fear being skinny

I’ve never cared about my weight. The only time I used to typically see it is at my annual physical just because I don’t care to have weight loss as a religion. I don’t want my weight to define me. So I’ve never cared until now.

For the past some odd years I’ve battled depression and have never gone to the doctor about it. That’s a story in itself, but this fact matters because I knew if I wasn’t going to go to get medical and professional help I was going to have to pull myself out of it as best I can. So when I decided not to wallow, I researched what I could do to help myself and get healthy in mind and body. Two things I found was I was eating terribly and I was tired all the time. Feeling sick physically wasn’t helping me feel good overall. So I changed my eating habits. I ate more than one meal a day and ate my veggies like I should and cut out unnecessary carbs. As soon as I felt stronger I started to go to the gym.

When I started in August I was 228 (I am 5’7”). Today I weigh 208. I eat 3 meals a day and I do not eat after my last meal, which is typically the bigger of the three as I head to the gym right after. There’s no set diet or calorie counting. I just watch portion sizes and eat a lot less carbs. Most of the time it’s meat and veggies because I enjoy the variations. I eat more vegetables than I do anything else. Breakfast is usually two eggs or a banana depending on how late I’m running. I don’t eat any sweets and cut coffee out to about once a week. My gym time is only cardio right now since I do a lot of other things in the evening. I run as far as I can in 30 minutes, which right now I’m up to 2 miles.

I’ve always been fat, but never morbidly so. Since my lifestyle change I’ve started to notice clothes are a lot baggier or looser. People are noticing my weight loss and congratulating me. I’ve never had an issue with being fat, but I have a fear of being skinny. I am back in the dating pool after a hiatus and being skinny and single is not something I look forward to. I feel like I won’t be taken seriously if I am skinny or men will only be attracted to my looks rather than who I am as a person. Being fat was a peace of mind, but it also wasn’t healthy.

I don’t know how far I want to go. To me I just want to be healthy. My doctors at my wellness checkups would always say some variation of “You’re perfectly healthy! Your BMI is just not where it should be.” And while my body might have physically been healthy despite the weight, my lifestyle and food intake was actually affecting my mental well being. Since the change I’ve had more energy, I’ve had less bad days, and I feel a lot better. Maybe I can kick my skinny fear to the curb and just learn to be okay with the outcome of my lifestyle change.

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[Crosspost/Maintenance] Hit 6 months of maintenance.. sort of?

So I posted this a few weeks ago to r/ownit and a well-loved member of r/loseit recommended that I post it here as well to share my struggles and maybe see if anyone else has any advice or words of encouragement for me. On a more positive note: I am only 4 weeks away from my first marathon: Marine Corp Marathon! As an update: I have began counting my calories again at -1lb a week, but struggle to stick to the number. Below is the original post:

Hello all,

I just recently reached 6 months of maintaining a 140lb weight loss, while coping with BED and food addiction. Im proud of this but I wish I felt more excited about it but I’m really still struggling. I gave myself a 5ish pound range of 175-180. I have managed to stay under 180 for the most part (aside from a few weigh ins of 181). However, I’m definitely on the edge, or the upper end of my range.

I stopped counting calories for about a month, just to experiment with different maintenance styles. There were some upsides to this: I stopped obsessing about food, bad foods, good foods, etc. I stopped overeating on foods I like because I had a mentality that ‘I can eat this anytime’ and that really stopped me from overindulging. I stopped beating myself up over numbers so much. I ate when I was hungry instead of ignoring my hunger. I was a lot happier and felt normal for once.

However, I’m not sure if I gained weight in that month and that’s what’s causing my weight to be in the upper numbers. I’ve gone back to calorie counting this week.

I’ve always been a perfectionist and have black and white thinking. I can’t seem to get over some seriously draining mentalities in maintenance:

• I beat myself up for not being in the lower end of my range.
• I constantly feel like I need to lose more weight.
• I feel guilty for eating my exercise calories (even though I’m marathon training and burning a LOT).
• Whenever I see red in MFP I feel terribly guilty.
• The scale causes me panic. If I see it go down it’s a good day. If it goes up I get depressed. I can’t separate my emotions from the number. I overreact regardless of if the number is up or down.
• I feel guilty for wanting ‘bad’ foods.
• I have no idea what’s normal to eat or how much.
• I can’t stop envisioning myself gaining all the weight back.
• I sometimes have drastic thoughts like fasting or trying appetite suppressants to keep the weight off.
• I always think I’m gaining weight even when I might not be.
• I never feel in control of my weight or my body, even when I’m counting calories (unless I’m 100% perfect everyday).
• If I go out to eat I feel guilty for my choices (unless it’s salad).
• I’ve become exhausted at the idea of losing more weight. If, let’s say, I gained 3-4 pounds, I know it will take months to lose it again and I feel defeated.
• I feel like I haven’t succeeded at this big “lifestyle change.” Even after all this time. I don’t automatically reach for a healthy option, I force myself to and I resent it.

I really don’t know how to handle any of this, and I can’t afford therapy or anything. I’m exhausted after nearly 3 years of working on my weight and my relationship with food. I’ve tried to think more positively and remember why I lost all the weight, I make lists about my life now vs then and how it’s better now. I do all that stuff.

I don’t want to give up, but I can’t help but sometimes feel like it’s my ‘fate’ or ‘destiny’ to be fat, because I have been since childhood.

I’m not sure if I’m asking for advice here or just venting. I think my thinking is so warped but I dunno how to change it or eat less. All I want is to succeed at this maintenance thing.

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Chances of a woman classified as 'obese' or 'overweight' reaching a 'normal' weight it only 0.8%?

Feeling really stressed about my weight lately. I started my weight loss journey three years ago. I was 205, and managed to get to 155. I stayed there for a while. I've gained back. I hover around 175 now. It kills me to know I've undone some of my progress....but I haven't been able to get back to what I was doing before. Logging my food, exercising....it all worked. But I can't get BACK there. And it makes me afraid I never will and that losing weight is impossible. I came across a scientific journal article that said what the above title states....the chances of an overweight woman ever reaching a normal size is only .8%, because of the body violently protesting against it. Basically it claimed that losing weight would trigger hunger hormones and slow down your metabolism. I've always told myself not to listen to this stuff. But it makes me scared I'll NEVER hit my goal weight. I'll never even get back to 155. Super bummed today.

Any advice on how to START back up after failing for a looooong time?

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Motivation Please!

21y/o F, 172cm and currently 83kg - I've lost 5.1kg since the 1st of September but have hit a wall :(

I was doing really well calorie counting until a week ago when I got sick and my brother also came over to visit. While he was here I still ate below maintenance calories (I calorie count everything), but he bought lots of sugary foods and since he left I can't stop craving sweet food!! Haven't lost any weight since.

Anyone have any tips on how to get over the sugar cravings again and get back on board with my weight loss plan?

Will accept motivational comments and tough love comments to kick me back into gear

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Crossed into a realm I forethought would be unobtainable

I was 273 lbs at my heaviest as a junior in high school. I guess I really didn't realize the extent to how fat I was, but I was massive and looking at old pictures of myself is tough sometimes. I got to college last year as a freshman, and over the course of the year a lack of good food on campus lead to slight weight loss - something I mostly disregarded because I was still eating unhealthy foods, not exercising, and smoking weed all day.

I came home last February after a hospital bout with mono. Was home for about 2 1/2 weeks and over that course of time lost 20 lbs due to how sick I was. It was at this time I truly realized how good it felt to shed weight, despite being so sick - I felt lighter, more confident, and looked better in the mirror. It wasn't until summer when I finally began grinding, but this feeling is what sparked me to truly go out and get it.

I signed up for a gym membership in July and went 5-6x a week, typically running 1.5-2 miles/day and biking 4-6 miles/day on the elliptical. That full workout would burn 300-500 calories a day, on top of a (mostly) strict calories deficit diet where I'd usually eat no more than once a day. Through this grind period over the summer I saw my weight rapidly decrease from 230, to 225, to 215... and so on. After getting back to school for my sophomore year, my gym grind has mostly stopped but I have instead embraced the keto diet.

Through a medley of exercise, keto, OMAD, and extreme calorie deficit, for the first time since I was in 8th grade there is a 1 in front of my weight. I weighed myself at 199.0 lbs this morning. I still haven't reached my goal of 185 - but this is a massive milestone for me.

Never going back. I promise to you - for everyone who lurks through this sub thinking "i'm going to be obese for the rest of my life", it's so much more possible to lose weight than you think.

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Perception VS Reality in the mirror post weight loss

Hi there,

So long story short Ive lost about 160LB (yay me). Ive gone from 50' waist to a 36. 3XLT/4XL to a LT (im 6'5) and so obviously I know i have lost a significant amount of weight. Everytime I run into someone who I havent seen in a while, the most common reaction is "holy shit, you look amazing". Ive also become an inspiration to many friends who have been looking to shed a few pounds which feels kind of cool to be the unhealthy one to the healthy one. Ive also noticed on the street more ladies smiling and being more approachable (which I dont mind at all). I also for the most part escaped the dreaded loose skin. I have a bit, but I dont look like an action figure that had been melted.

​

Here's the thing...

Since ive lost all this weight, I generally find myself not noticing the change in the mirror. Its weird. I notice a weight loss for sure. When I put on my old fat jeans that now feel like clown pants, its surreal to say the least. However, I just cant believe ive lost this weight. Ive gone from 386 to 226/227 and am super proud of every pound lost. My energy is way up and my gym game is solid, but I still feel like the fat guy. I know im not and ive actually become to be one of the lighter / in the middle range of my social circle, but Im really struggling to mentally correlate that I am not longer that 386 pound guy. Is this normal? Does it pass? For what its worth, it has helped me keep my diet in check, but I find I have this mental block and in a weird way a visual block. I see myself in the mirror and no im skinnier, but not 160LBS skinnier.

​

TLDR: Used to be really big, now not so much, but still feel like I am

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[Challenge] Super Mario Fall 2018 Challenge - Sign Ups!

Hello and Welcome to the LoseIt Fall 2018 Super Mario Challenge!

Your hosts this round will be u/Jameson1780, u/bananaslammock08, u/cosmam, u/sweetpsd, myself, and u/ThatCanadianGuy88 King of the Peasants!

Sign ups are now Open Sign Up Link Here!

Challenge Tracker Tracker Page Here!

Teams & Captains:

Joining your team subreddit isn’t mandatory but it should be. Being active with your team keeps participation up and might be that extra little push you need to keep you going. It could be the difference between an 8 week grind or 8 weeks of fun and support to lose the weight you want. Please do not ask to be assigned to a particular team.

​

Team Mario Subreddit Here! - u/sweetpsd & u/gan1lin2 & u/dylzim

Team Yoshi Subreddit Here! - u/bananaslammock08 & u/Vicariousgluten

Team Bowser Subreddit Here! - u/420spirit9 & u/revdrviking, & u/vampedvixen

Team Luma Subreddit Here! - u/capitulum & u/grneyesofdeath07

Team Waluigi Subreddit Here! - u/ravenclawedo1 & u/Cadamar & u/Koehanna

Team Boo Subreddit Here! - u/ZeAltHealthAcct & u/Unconcernedlion & u/MrManBeard

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If you have any questions, problems, concerns, ideas, or just want to drop us all a line, please use the message the challenge admin feature, which you can find in the r/loseit sidebar or by clicking here. Responding to this thread is great, but ultimately if you want to make sure all of us read it, the message the challenge admin feature is the way to go.

Please also note that we are not the r/loseit moderators. We’re volunteers and everyday users who run a specific aspect of one of the many interactive community elements of r/loseit. If you have questions about r/loseit that aren’t specific to the challenge, please take a look at the sidebar.

FAQs

What is the challenge?

The challenge is team-based competition that will last for 6 weeks (8 weeks from the beginning of signups to the results week) for which you set a weight-loss goal and then weigh in weekly, hoping to be at or beyond that goal by the end of the challenge.

What will I have to do during the challenge?

Weigh-in every week, each week begins on a Friday, so you will have until the following Friday 8am EST (when the next week is posted) to complete your weigh-in. You can miss the occasional week, but if you are going to miss two weeks in a row you must let the challenge admins know so they don’t remove you from the challenge. If you're a forgetful person, setting up reminders on your phone and/or joining the group discord chat might be a good idea.

How to succeed during the challenge:

• Check what team you’re on by looking at the Challenge Tracker and searching for your username (control + f username).
• Join your team’s subreddit, introduce yourself and be an active team member. Many captains have an online chat set up for their teams too!
• If you have any questions, worries or need encouragement, lean on your team and if someone else needs some support, be supportive.
• If you binge or have a bad week, don’t give up, log honestly and come back next week. Weight loss is not always linear and there will be ups and downs, but focus on the overall downward trend.

Rule Reminders

Missing Week 0 is an automatic boot. Do not ask for access to edit anything. All entries are submitted via form. The only people who can/should edit the trackers are the Challenge Admins.

Timeline

September 28th - Sign ups open

October 12th - Week 0

October 19th - Week 1 - Sign ups close

October 26th - Week 2

November 2nd - Week 3

November 9th - Week 4

November 16th - Week 5

November 23rd - Week 6/FINAL WEEK

November 30th - Results week (and break until January)

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