Wednesday, November 24, 2021

My postpartum body and lack of motivation: help?

Hi. I am a 32 year old newish mom (my daughter is almost one). I have never posted before but today I felt brave enough to put this out there. A little backstory on me: I used to be extremely fit. But, before I was fit, I was also overweight for my height my entire life. A fond memory I have as a child is uniform shopping and how my pants were called "size whatever husky". Cute. I went through a bad divorce when I was 25, lost a good 50lbs and managed to keep it off for years. The gym was MY sanctuary. It banished my depression to an unknown island somewhere in the middle of the Pacific with no cell service. During the beginning of the pandemic, I got high off of riding my bike solo 50+ miles a day. I was a dedicated vegan. I ran sprints and laps FOR FUN. I had an amazing body and for once in my life, I had confidence. I felt sexy. I had never felt this before in my entire existence. And then BOOM, I got pregnant. Major, major surprise. HUGE. I had a horrible pregnancy and gained 70lbs (I was 110lbs, 5'2 when I got knocked up), swelled up with fluid and had varicose veins bulging out of my legs.

Fast forward to now- I absolutely hate my body. I have not been able to shed a lot of the weight I gained. Along with that, I have lose skin and a ton of stretch marks. I look in the mirror and cry quite often. I look extremely old and washed out. I know everyone tells me "it hasn't been a year yet blah blah blah" "you birthed a baby, get used to your new body" etc. No, this is not my new body. This is a shell where a former happy person used to be. I love my daughter with all of my heart, but she ruined me. I suffered/suffer from PPD and depression/anxiety. It came back from vacation with a new sense of style. It has been very hard to deal with, and I know this may sound like a silly reason to feel sad, but it makes me so upset. I worked so hard for so many years and now I cry almost every day when I see myself naked. I will not even let my fiancée touch me in certain areas of my body. None of my clothes fit. My style is not even a style anymore, it is basically "ok this fits".

I have absolutely no motivation to work out. I know the problem can be solved, but I am so tired all the time, the thought of going to the gym after working all day and caring for a small child...is just so overwhelming to me. The few times I have gone to the gym, I am so self conscious. I have no confidence in myself. I feel like I do not belong there and start comparing myself to the beautiful, fit women in sports bras. I start crying at the thought of "that used to be me". I used to walk into a gym and make it my bitch. What happened? My fiancée does his best to try and motivate me, but it honestly just makes me not want to go even more. I tell myself "you'll do it tomorrow" or "when I get home tonight, I will do sit ups or go for a run". SIKE. I never do it. I cannot talk myself into working out to save my life. I feel like I have totally lost myself and who I used to be in that aspect. I can barely ride my bike 3 miles without gasping for air. I do not have many friends where I live and the few I do have are already skinny, so the gym just isn't on their priority list. I eat healthy, I drink tons of water...hell I even got on Adipex to help me and it still doesn't motivate me. I know if I worked out like I used to, I would not be crying and holding my own pity party almost weekly. I need my depression to chill...and not here but somewhere far away again.

Yesterday, I found a reddit thread with progress photos. I cried at the before and after's. All I can see in the photos is their smile. The weight loss was amazing but the smiles. The confidence. The motivation. I swore to myself Monday, November 29th my life will change. I swore to myself I will be the before and after for another mom/person who is feeling the same way I am. I want my daughter to be able to look at her mommy and say "I want to be strong like mommy!". I want her to not have body image issues like I did as a kid (and adult). I want her to see what being confident is all about and to make healthy life choices. I want her to see me happy with myself because so far in her 10 little months on Earth, she has not. And that is sad.

How can I keep this fire inside of me burning? Have you or someone you know felt the way I do, and how was it handled? Why is it that I am told just to deal with my body just because I gave birth? I like my hips but I know that this weak person is not me. How can I stay on track? Any advice you can give me on this new chapter of my life is appreciated. Please go easy on me, it took a lot for me to even write this and I am not even sure if this is where it belongs...but maybe someone else is going through the same thing and has the same questions.

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I've been doing everything right but I'm losing no weight. Advice?

15F, 5"5 and 154 pounds. Please don't say things like "you're too young to lose weight just focus on other things" or anything similar to that, my doctor has told me I need to lose weight and I am insecure about my body so Im going to want to lose weight anyways.

Mentions of menstruation ahead (I don't think that's NSFW but some people are grossed out by it so I'm giving a warning.)

I'm eating between 1,000 and 1,300 calories a day. Every day this week I've been walking on the treadmill an hour a day, and on Monday and Tuesday I went to bowling practice for 2 and a half hours each day, and it was intense bowling, not casual.

I weigh myself every morning before breakfast to see my progress. I've lost NO weight. It's not because of my water intake because im drinking at least 2 bottles a day.

This is making me very upset because I had a goal to be somewhere in the 140s by Thanksgiving but that's TOMORROW so there's absolutely no way I'll make it in time.

I am on my period so I'm not sure if that's affecting my weight loss.

One last thing, I am NOT skipping meals. I eat breakfast and dinner, and usually have a snack during lunch time, I'm usually not that hungry during the midday so I don't eat a full meal because that's not something I need.

Can someone please give advice? I know this isn't impossible because I've lost 30 lbs so far.

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Slowing down RMR with weightloss?

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27136388/

TL;DR for the study: Biggest Loser contestants apparently had a significantly lower RMR after weight loss than what a person of their age/height/gender/weight would usually have.

I've seen a few other threads here on this study, but there doesn't seem to be a definite answer in regards to the lowered-RMR problem. Sure, the equation they used to calculate RMR wasn't very good, but there are other studies that point to a lowered RMR after weight loss using other methods (maybe a few hundred calories less). There are also studies that show that a lowered RMR from weight loss is temporary, and even others that show there's no change at all (accounting for lower bodyweight and protein intake).

Are there any recent studies that give a relatively definitive answer to the question of if RMR slows significantly after a period of weight loss?

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Unexpected benefit to eating better, and what I'm looking forward to

I've only just started with my weight loss (see flair) but I'm already seeing benefits to eating better. I used to have an issue with having insanely itchy feet, especially at night. It was agonizing, especially since I have a lot of trouble bending over to scratch. My doctor did not know what was causing it, so he ordered blood tests and the only things out of the ordinary were elevated cholesterol and iron deficiency. Since I started improving my diet, the itch has gone away almost completely. I'm hoping for other benefits, including:

*Improved flexibility. My hip flexors are extremely tight because I've spent so much time sitting down (a definite disadvantage of working from home).

*Less knee pain. I was diagnosed with arthritis in my knees to a degree that's normally seen in much older people. *Improved energy and mental clarity. I spend a lot of time in a brain fog and sleep more than I should.

*Actually having the desire to exercise. Right now, exercise means pain.

*I have depression and anxiety, and I'm hoping to be able to deal with my mental health issues more effectively.

*Not having hip, back and knee pain when walking or standing for a long time.

I'm sure there are other benefits I'm not thinking of right now...

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Thankfulness Post

I had a pretty awful period in my life recently and a lot of people came and helped me out through it and I am super grateful. So I am making a point to send them all messages this year and every year going forward because you never know when they will be out of your life for one reason or another. In the spirit of that I just wanted to say thank you all for being such a great community. Sometimes I don't feel like I'm making progress with my weight loss seeing the posts on here make me happy and give me some inspiration. I really am happy to see that 99% of the time this community is supportive of one an other which is rare to see on the internet. So thank you all for being yourselves. I wish you all the best with the holidays if you have the ability and opportunity to spend time with family then take it. If you don't or can't you will be in my thoughts and I hope you find some way to make it special for yourself. With a nice meal somewhere or peaceful moment to reflect.

Eat good food my friends! Let's make this next year an amazing one!

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Remember that every pound on the scale, every 0.5 inch, every picture is proof that you're doing something right

I made a post yesterday about the struggle of pushing through weight loss. Today, I'll hit you guys with some inspiration, because sometimes we tend to disregard our progress hoping we had done more.

I was out last weekend for a mini vacation, I knew I was going to eat out all the time, I picked healthy-ish food. I honestly don't think I've ate over my maintenance all weekend, if anything I probably had 1 day of deficit still. Nonetheless I was dreading the numbers the scale would give me once I'd be back home. Ofc, I was back at 331, but I didn't go crazy about it, was 298 before leaving. I knew 100% that this was most likely water weight, I didn't drink as much water as I normally do. Grinded the gym/cardio monday, tuesday, and this morning I was at 295. I'm back on track. I'm hoping to shed to 294 for my weekly weight-in.

Now, why am I telling you this? It's easy to say for me cause I've yet to hit a plateau, and knock on wood I won't but that being said I have been on a steady 2lbs+ weekly and it's been amazing, problem is, once you're used to losing 2 lbs a week, I had 1 week where I loss only 1 lbs. Now the fact I said "only" is a problem. It's still a victory. 1 lbs is very good progress regardless, but I got so used to the 2lbs a week mentality that when I saw I had only loss 1lbs it felt like I hadn't made any progress.

This post is to remind you all that you need to look back sometimes, realize where you started, realize the progress and the change you made in your life. I can say for myself that if I were to meet my old self, he would probably wonder who the hell I am. This is a lifestyle, a mindset and we got this. If you weight-in weekly and lose weight, no matter the amount, realize that this is a victory. If you take measurement monthly, notice the slight decrease in the number, realize you've put in the work. If you take progress picture monthly, compare with the last month, I garantee you that you will see a difference. If you fit better in certain clothes, notice it, be happy about it. The moment you start noticing those change is the moment you'll get all the momentum you need to realize what you are doing is working and it's worth it.

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23 Tips for a Healthier Thanksgiving

Ready or not, here they come…

In case you’ve missed the glaring lights and blaring commercials, it’s official… the holidays are upon us. And Thanksgiving, with all of its food-based traditions, promises to put your weight loss willpower to the test.

According to research from the Calorie Control Council, a typical traditional Thanksgiving dinner can clock in at 3,000 calories. Add some apps and drinks, and you’ve got yourself a 4,500 calorie meal—that’s more than two times the average daily intake. This same source reports that the average Thanksgiving enthusiast may fill up on close to 230 grams of fat—the fat equivalent of three sticks of butter.

But with a little planning, you can make it through Thanksgiving without putting on more stuffing. Check out these 23 simple strategies that are sure to help keep the “trim” in your turkey day:

1. Don’t skip breakfast
Don’t “save space” for dinner. We all know what happens when we don’t eat all day—we become ravenous and are more likely to gobble up everything in sight. Plus, when it comes to weight loss, the old adage that breakfast is the most important meal of the day may very well hold true. In a study in the journal Obesity, overweight people who were dieting and ate more calories for breakfast than dinner lost more weight compared with subjects who ate larger evening meals. Make sure to opt for a morning meal that’s high in protein like an egg white veggie omelet or non-fat Greek yogurt with fresh fruit—this will help keep you feeling fuller as you head into the potential diet dark hole that is Thanksgiving dinner.

2. Work in a workout
Be sure to get a good sweat session in before you dive in to dinner. A study published in 2009 in the American Journal of Physiology revealed that vigorous exercise may suppress a key hunger hormone for up to 30 minutes after workouts and can increase the levels of an appetite-suppressing hormone for as long as three hours after exercise. Not convinced? Get this: A 2013 study published in the journal Neuroreport revealed that participants who exercised craved healthier foods, like fiber-rich beans and veggies rather than those packed with refined sugar (think cookies and cakes). The researchers discovered that physical exercise may be linked to reduced activity in the food-responsive reward regions in the brain which, in turn, are linked to a reduced preference for unhealthy high-calorie foods.

3. Don’t pick as you prep
A tiny taste here, a tiny taste there. Before you know it, you’ve consumed a meal’s worth of calories. You don’t normally pick all day long, right? So don’t start now. Eat your regular meals at your regularly scheduled times and limit your splurges to small selections at dinner time. Your waistline will thank you.

4. Bring a helping of healthy
Volunteer to bring a side of roasted veggies, fresh salad or fruit tray, so that if all else fails, you’ve got one healthy option to pile on your plate! Try these delicious Brussels Sprouts with Apple—they’re simple to make and totally guilt-free.

5. Drink water before and during your meal
In a study published in 2015 in the journal Obesity (Silver Springs), participants who drank 500 milliliters of water 30 minutes before a meal lost more weight than those who did not drink up prior to chowing down. But don’t limit your liquids to the time before your meal. Sip water throughout your Thanksgiving meals to keep you feeling fuller and slow down your gobbling.

6. Nix the rolls
Pass on the bread bowl and you could save yourself anywhere from 100 to 200 calories, plus the 100 calories in the butter you would have slathered all over it. With so much food at your disposal, we doubt you’ll even miss it.

7. Use a smaller plate
A study published in 2015 in the Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews revealed that when people—even the health conscious—were given larger plates, they consistently consumed more food than those using smaller plates. The same held true for non-alcoholic beverages consumption—the larger the glass, the bigger the gulps. Opt for a smaller plate at dinner and chances are good you’ll stick to smaller portions.

8. Veg out

Time and again research confirms that high-fiber foods, which provide volume in the body and take longer to digest, help you feel full longer—on fewer calories. Help yourself to high-fiber foods like fruits and veggies, whole grains and bean dishes. Just don’t fall for dishes drenched in butter or creamy sauces, which can be loaded with calories and fat.

9. Fine-tune your turkey selection
For many, it just wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without the taste of turkey. Just make sure to opt for white meat, and don’t eat the skin. With this simple swap, you could save 7 grams of fat and over 50 calories (for a serving size that’s roughly equivalent to a deck of cards). Might not sound like a lot, but tiny trimmings like these can pile up quickly.

10. Put your fork down between bites
Based on a study published in 2014 in the Journal of Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics, increasing the number of chews during meals can extend the duration of those meals, reduce the speed at which people eat, and lead to less food consumed. Make an effort to put down your fork and chew your food several times before diving in to your next bite. Bonus: You’ll actually taste all of those fabulous flavors when you slow down!

11. Be a ‘Chatty Cathy’
The more you talk, the slower you’ll eat. The slower you eat, the better the chances of your body signaling it is full before you overeat. See #10.

12. Be mindful of extras
Between the gravy, butter and creamy dressings, Thanksgiving add-ons can be total fat traps. Try seasoning your food with spices and herbs, and opt for vinegar-based dressings.

13. Don’t drink your calories
A 12-ounce bottle of pumpkin beer is somewhere in the 200 calorie range. A five ounce glass of spiced apple wine can clock in at 271 calories. Think you’ll save tons of calories avoiding alcohol? Not exactly. A 16-ounce glass of apple cider can cost you almost 230 calories. Wash down your meal with water (see #5), sparkling water, tea or coffee instead and your waistline will thank you.

14. Step away from the table
Once you’ve eaten a normal-sized dinner, kindly remove yourself from the table so you don’t start mindlessly munching. Head to another room in the house or better yet, engage in some good old fashioned family fun (see #15 and #16!).

15. Start an active tradition
Holidays are all about traditions, right? Start a new ritual, like a family football game or a group stroll around the neighborhood. Studies have shown that going for a walk instead of hitting the couch, about 15 minutes after a meal may improve digestion and blood sugar control, and will burn some extra calories. Plus, stepping away from the table for a bit may save you from diving into another pile of potatoes.

16. Focus on the fun
Take the focus off of food and put it back where it belongs—on spending quality time with your loved ones. Bring board games or DVDs. Share in a few rounds of post-dinner charades. Or gather up the troops and hit the local soup kitchen to help serve dinner to the less fortunate. Forget the food—there’s fun to be had!

17. Wait 20 minutes before even considering seconds
Stick to this rule of thumb: If you’re still hungry after 20 minutes (the commonly accepted amount of time it takes for your stomach to send your brain the “I’m stuffed” signal), you can go back for seconds.

18. Ask the hard questions before heading back for more
Before hitting the buffet for a second round, ask yourself if you’re really hungry. Sometimes just seeing a large spread can make us eat more. In fact, in a study published in 2005 in the Journal of Nutrition Education and Behavior, when moviegoers were provided stale popcorn in big buckets, they ate 34 percent more than those given the same stale popcorn in smaller tubs. In the case of fresh popcorn, those given large tubs ate almost 50 percent more than those given medium-sized buckets. If you aren’t just being thrown off by a sizable spread, ask yourself: If I could have seconds of just one dish, which would it be? Then opt for that option only.

19. Skip seconds if you plan on doing dessert
Survey the food scene before you dive in for seconds, and map out a strategy. If grandma’s rhubarb pie is on your radar, don’t stuff your face with more stuffing. If you yearn for candy yams year-round, don’t get chummy with the crumb cake. Decide on one or two indulgences you’d like to try ahead of time, and don’t eat everything in sight before you get to them.

20. Don’t be guilted into gobbling
While it’s nice that aunt so-and-so brought her world-famous pie, that doesn’t mean you have to eat it. If you’re going to enjoy foods you might normally avoid, make sure you do the picking. Feel uncomfortable refusing? Tell your aunt you’re too stuffed but you’ll take it to-go. If you’re lucky, she’ll forget, if you’re not so lucky and she piles on the pie, give a loved one your leftovers.

21. Fill up on fruit for dessert
Remember how we told you to bring healthier dishes (see #4)? A fruit tray is a great option. That way, when everyone else is pigging out on apple pie, you can enjoy some fresh apple slices with a sprinkle of cinnamon.

22. Leave the leftovers
If you can get away with it, leave the doggy bag for the other diners. While one day of indulging won’t destroy your diet, several in a row certainly can. Pass on the extra potatoes and remove all temptation tomorrow.

23. Don’t miss the point–family!
We bet that this time next year you won’t even be able to recall what exactly you ate at Thanksgiving this year. The taste of dessert is fleeting; memories with your family are forever. Take this time, when there is no work or school or real life to worry about, and enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. Cherish the company, not the food.

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