It’s been 3 years since I first started my weight loss journey

SW: 175, CW: 145, 35 y/o, qfemale, 5’ 6.5”, body type: athletic (used to think I was curvy!)

Holy cow, I can’t believe it’s been 3 years since I joined this community. I’m SO happy with my progress. I’m at my ideal weight, and now I’m no longer focused on losing but maintaining and gaining muscle tone/shaping my body via exercise. I plateaued about a year ago, and have been a consistent weight since then. I lost a bit of roundness to my face, and people actually think I’ve gotten taller (lol). There’s some loose skin around my abdomen but it doesn’t bother me that much, I’m just thankful that I did something positive for myself. I fluctuate about +- 5 pounds when I go on vacation. I aim to exercise 3 times a week and focus on weight lifting, I eat about 1,600 calories a day. I walk an average of about 8,000 steps per day. I live in New York and prioritized biking or walking to work more than taking Ubers or the subway.

The most important detail I can share is that I have completely changed my mindset about food, what a “meal” is, what I like has shifted drastically. I actually crave healthy things, BUT if I go on vacation and over indulge on carbs and sugar I do find myself slipping back. Just 2-3 days off sugar and carbs brings me back to normal levels with less brain fog and cravings. :) just sharing here in case my journey is helpful for others! It does get easier!

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(Vent) Losing the weight did not make me *That Girl*

Hello folks. Long time lurker. First time poster here. Since last year, I have lost 15kg (33 pounds) and now I'm currently 5kg (11 lbs) away from my goal weight and I'm starting to feel ....what's the point of all these effort in losing the weight.

From young, I have always put off many things because of my weight. Small things like clothes, I just didnt feel like I deserve it. I guess it's like I'm waiting to become a different magical skinny unbothered queen before I can be happy.

I thought that once I lost the weight, I could transform into That Girl, beautiful, productive and....happy.

Instead, I'm still very much just me. Losing the weight did not make me beautiful, productive or...happy. I used to be able to dream that once I lose the weight I would be happy. But now my hopes are dashed because I know the truth now. I'm never going to be the swan in ugly duckling. Just one of the ducklings with a little less weight.

I'm mourning the loss of my old body, being able to look down at my boobs used to make me feel a little better about being overweight. Hey at least I've got these girls.

I'm mourning being able to eat whatever I like and not think whelp there goes my calorie limit. Eating is my source of endorphins, and limiting that has been really tough.

I'm mourning the girl I'm never going to be. The girl who wakes up at 5am, does pilates, meditate, exercises, eats healthy and be happy.

I went into weight loss with shallow reasons and I'm losing my motivation...

Yes walking and running feels easier, almost effortless. Yes finding clothes is so much easier. There is a myraid of benefits weight loss has given me but it has not fulfilled me.

At this point if you are still reading my shallow rambles, thank you. I don't want to discourage anyone from their journey. I hope that your journey would be a positive one.

Ps. Apologies if the formatting is weird as I'm on mobile

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On Instagram Fitfluencers, Weight Loss, and Loose Skin

It grinds my gears so much to see Instagram fitness influencers (fitfluencers) making those clickbait-y posts saying things like, “I lost 128 lbs with NO excess skin by following my 2-4-6 method! DM me “SKIN” for the link to my guide.” No matter how much damage they think they’re absolving themselves of by pinning a comment full of fine print (saying “Guys, this was just my experience, and you CAN minimize loose skin, I’m just saying that you don’t have to have any, etc.”), it still plants the idea in people’s mind that a specific workout plan or diet or “method” can fully prevent something that in the end, will be decided mostly by genetics.

I also think about the person who’s in a position to lose weight and is being told that they need to avoid loose skin: is that the kind of thought we should be having, right now? If someone’s joints, heart health, hormones, cholesterol and more are at risk, is loose skin something they should be sending an influencer $100 for? It’s normal to think and worry about loose skin. I did. I sometimes still do! However, on my list of priorities… It falls lower and lower every day.

If you haven’t been told today, I hope you remember to take what you see on social media with a healthy handful of salt! There are a lot of resources on this subreddit, and you can learn LOTS about weight loss, healthy eating, your body, and movement here, and from certified experts.

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[Opinion] Are my techniques for restaurants/fast food during my weight loss good?

So here I am, I've been losing weight for 5 months and I'm quite happy with the journey I've made even if it's far from over. But I had reached a point where I refused any restaurant/fast food outing with my friends or family for fear of knowing how much I was going to eat and no longer being in my calorie deficit.

But I had a break during my vacation because I couldn't weigh what I ate, count calories precisely or simply refuse restaurants/fast food. (I went to 5 restaurants/fast food in 2 weeks) . At first this situation made me stressed but it has been a little better since then.

Here are the techniques I used:

For restaurants, I knew it in advance so I ate less before or after to fit in my daily calories. Then I didn't have a drink, I stuck to water and I didn't have dessert. As for the dish, I prioritized chicken with baked potatoes or vegetables.

For fast food I took nuggets because I noticed that they were the least caloric compared to burgers or others. Of course I don't have fries, drinks or dessert. (ex: at Burger King I take 13 nuggets for around 568kcal and 50g of carbohydrates, 35 of proteins, 30 of lipids). I didn't know but fast food places put the nutritional information on their website

That's what I learned during my vacation, it's that I can go out with my friends or family without necessarily feeling guilty. I just need to anticipate and try to make the best choices to meet my calorie deficit. My techniques may not be excellent but it's the way I found to continue going out without too much stress.

When do you think? Do you have any other tips?

For your information, I weigh around 130kg for 190cm and I work at around 1800kcal per day. Breakfast ~ 300kcal Lunch ~ 700kcal Snack ~ 100kcal Dinner ~ 700kcal

With 45 min of strengthening exercise at home 6/7 days and between 5k-10k steps per day.

Thank you to those who take the time to respond. (sorry for spelling mistakes)

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Constantly being rejected is my motivation

Started at 294, down to 263. 36M, always been awkward around women. I've been rejected so many times because of the "no chemistry reaction". I understand I can't blame it all on my weight, but its been my primary motivation by far.

Has significant weight loss helped any of you with your dating life? I'm shooting get under 200 pounds. When I was in high school I was teetering on the 200 pound range, and I had more success with women. It is all just self confidence or does the weight matter that much? Am I just fooling myself? I've been running and lifting weights, It's definitely not easy, but I'm pretty determined to improve myself.

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Starting Today

There’s not much more to say. I’ve been neglecting my body and I’ve been procrastinating on changing this huge part of my life that’s affected me both mentally, physically and emotionally. I feel willing to make a change today and I will do it. I’ve tried in the past and failed, but not this time, I’ll be taking it slow making consistent effort to better myself every day. If you have any advice, please feel free to drop it in the comments! I would like to lose approximately 25 kgs/55 lbs.

TL;DR: Starting weight loss journey, need advice if you have any

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Family reacting negatively to my weight loss

In the past year, I (25M) have lost around 30 pounds going from 230 (I was even bigger in high school, almost reacing 270 pounds) to around 198-205, losing a shirt size and two pants sizes. I'm really happy with my progress and honestly never thought I could do it since I was always seen as a "bigger guy" my entire childhood, but now I could probably be described as a muscular build. But recently my family has been making passive aggressive comments about my weight loss, like my sister telling my mom behind my back that she thinks "he's losing too much weight, he looks way skinnier than last time" when in reality I just wore a shirt that fit me since I've shrunk a size.

My mom also makes comments like "thanks for visiting and letting me feed you" and then patting my stomach. These are just s couple comments they've made, but it hurts my feelings because they haven't said anything positive about my weight loss, only comments about how "your skinny now, do you just not eat?" and how I might not want dessert after dinner anymore. I'm not sure if this is projection of their jealousy or they feel "threatened" by my weight loss, since literally my whole immediate family is significantly overweight, except for my dad who's reasonably healthy for his age, maybe 5 or 10 pounds overweight. I thought they would be happy I lost weight, or at worst say nothing. Even my brother who used to be around my weight, but has since gained around 45 pounds back from depression makes comments saying "when I looked like you, dah dah dah" instead of just being happy for me as I was happy for him when he originally lost weigh and I was 25 pounds heavier than him. This just makes me want to wear baggy shirts around them so they don't make comments because it makes me uncomfortable and i sort of just go silent because I dont know how to react. Maybe I'm overreacting and should just ignore it, but ultimately it does hurt my feelings. Thankfully, though, I do have two close friends who have made positive comments about my weight loss.

Has anyone else experienced this and felt the same way?

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