Disclaimer: I felt bad for using the word hobo but I'm not sure how else to put this, lol
I've been overweight before, but I lost that weight and kept it off for many years until I gained it back and then even MORE after I became very ill.
Most of us already know the difference in how people treat us before and after weight loss, being treated better after losing weight can feel just as bitter as being treated worse after gaining weight.
But wow, rapidly gaining weight over a short amount of time while being sick and not receiving treatment, I'm absolutely broken about how people approached me, talked to me and treated me in general. The ignoring is real, being talked over is real, being dismissed is real, and despite being BIGGER, you somehow feel so, so very small. How ironic is that?
Now I'm finally back to my ''old'' self, I feel more cynical and skeptical than ever. I didn't feel this way when I was big the first time, I guess because I was so used to it. I remember things being like this back then, but this time around the experience and my reaction to it was entirely different.
I think it's also because I've been so sick and depressed, that I felt even more vulnerable while being bigger. When I first got sick, I actually initially became underweight. And when I was sickly and scrawny, people treated me even better than before. But when i gained weight and I was just as sick, that changed entirely. That too made me sick to my stomach.
I just wanted to vent a little bit, surely I can't be alone with this experience?
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/ukryXAE
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