[NSV] Sticking to Diet on Vacation

I've been off-and-on a weight loss journey for years, but I started taking my weight loss goals really seriously just over a month ago. For reference, I've been on Tim Ferriss' Slow Carb diet, so for 6 days a week, every meal consists of beans, veggies, and meat, and then I get 1 cheat day a week to eat forbidden foods.

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For the last week, I've been on a family vacation with about 50 relatives who I'm not particularly close with. Last week, my initial rapid weight loss was starting to slow up a bit and I was losing steam, so going into this week, I was really worried.

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Today's the last day of vacation, and tomorrow is my cheat day, so at the risk of jinxing myself, I think it's safe to say that I made it through the thick of it. After tonight, this will be the first time in my life that I've ever taken a vacation without throwing healthy eating to the wind.

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I feel really proud of myself for not letting external circumstances break my determination. I can't wait for some carbs tomorrow, but it will feel better because I think this is the first cheat day that I had to work so hard for that I've earned it :)

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A few things that I noticed over the last week:

1. Vacations are for self care. Part of taking care of yourself is eating right. Coming back from vacation having eaten right for the past week, I'm going to feel much more refreshed than if I'd eaten poorly.
2. I was worried that my relatives would take offense or be skeptical. I was pleasantly surprised to find that everyone was intrigued, supportive, or impressed.
3. It wasn't a big deal. Everyone tends to overestimate the extent to which other people think about them, and I'm no exception. Half of everyone didn't notice, and it was an amusing tidbit for everyone else. Everyone was thinking about what's on their plate, not what's on mine.

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If I could offer one piece of advice for future dieting vacationers:

1. BRING AND COOK YOUR OWN FOOD. I cannot stress this enough. Have zero expectations of group dinners / meals other people are making. There were plenty of times where I could eat a group meal made for everyone, but that was a pleasant surprise, not the general rule. If you're eating different from everyone else, make sure to take the work that comes with that on yourself - don't expect your friends and family to accommodate different eating styles.

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Go forth on your summer vacations, and keep your eye on your goals! :)

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I was not feeling it today. But I did it anyways.

(Just a little background, I’m about halfway into my weight loss goal (down from 345 to 268) and usually work out every day at lunch, Monday through Friday.)

Well, with this being the week of the 4th, I planned for one cheat afternoon, but it quickly turned into two days before I realized what was happening. So not only was I going to miss my Friday workout (leg day), but I was drinking/eating like crap more than just one meal; hell, more than even one day!

So this morning I reminded myself of my golden rule. “Something, anything, is always better than nothing.” So after I ate a healthy breakfast I went downstairs and did 20 pitiful minutes of cardio and a leg workout that left a lot to be desired. I feel like crap, which is a great reminder that drinking/eating like crap consecutively is much worse than just the random (or planned) cheat meal.

Now I’m going to enjoy some couch time with my family and Stranger Things. So if you’re like me and feel like doo doo after the holidays, just chug some water and go for a walk, or whatever small activity tickles your fancy. Because in the end, something, anything is better than nothing.

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Is weightlifting stalling my weight loss?

Hi everyone! For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been consistently weightlifting for 3x a week. I also do HIIT at least once a week. I’m also calorie counting and keeping my calories at around 1600. Recently I’ve been frustrated because while my bra band has gone down a size and my clothes fit better, I’m still stuck at 217 lbs (in February I weighed 225) . I’m obese so I thought this would be enough to make me lose some weight. Talking to some people, they said water retention from weightlifting can sometimes mask weight loss, especially since I’m new to lifting. Is this true? I don’t want to make excuses for myself I just feel stuck. I don’t want to quit lifting because it’s the only exercise I’ve consistently stuck with and loved, I’m just frustrated. Also, I would like to mention that the other day randomly I weighed myself at my friend’s house and I had dropped to 209 and then two days later was back to 217. Does anyone have any tips or reassurance? Should I just be patient?

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Hello, introduction, weight loss journey the past year.

Hi. My first post here, and I hope this is okay, but I wanted to share a little bit of what I've been doing, going through, and see if anyone had any advice or tips. First of all, I'm a middle-aged man, having just turned 53, although it seems surreal. I've struggled with weight nearly my entire life, after a series of surgeries on my feet and legs when I was young which prevented me from PE classes and most sports. I've also dealt with depression since at least 12, although I've never sought formal treatment.

My weight and activity level has fluctuated greatly over the years, but it really took a hit a number of years ago after a hiking accident--where I shattered my left ankle and broke both the tibia and fibula--followed by a botched surgery (mostly healed now but there are occasional complications). I gained quite a bit following that, and while I tried keeping somewhat active it wasn't enough. My biggest downfall, I believe, was a tendency to eat quite a bit at night, especially since my job entailed sitting at a computer every evening.

My wake up call to just how bad I had gotten came in May, 2018. I knew it was terrible, but I saw a photo of me from the back. I volunteer with a disaster relief organization, and a journalist took a photo of me on scene, and ouch. I also went to a doctor a little afterwards, got on the scale, which was 440lbs. So I really began working on dieting and getting in more exercise.

For the first few months it was a struggle with mixed results. I was trying a Mediterranean-style diet, but I was still a bit too tempted by pasta, deli meats, bread, potatoes, eating in the evening, and the like. (I live with people for whom these are staples). In October I tried Keto, as my sister has had success with it. I had okay results, but I felt physically and mentally terrible and had serious difficulty controlling my depression.

So in February I switched to a Mediterranean diet, but really went into it, along with meticulously writing down everything I ate and counting calories (staying under 1,000 a day which may be too limited). I've also limited meat. I've had fish or shrimp a couple times a week and some chicken maybe once a month. The results have been much more dramatic, my mood has improved, and with the weight loss I have been able to exercise more. Among general exercises, I often walk at a local park and/or ride a stationary bike each day. My current daily goal is three-mile walks or at least 30 continuous minutes on the bike. I'm now at 312lbs.

So where to go from here? I'm thinking of also joining a gym to use more equipment and have a place to exercise at odd hours and when weather's bad (I live in a rainy place with long winters), but I'm not sure if I'm still too large for the equipment. I've broken exercise bikes I've had in the past after extended use, especially since my left foot never fully straightened, so I twist it a bit. Hopefully gym-level machines would be more sturdy, but I don't want to damage them. And even with the "everyone's welcome" marketing of the one I'd likely join I don't know what the reality is.

So, hi. Thanks for reading that, and I hope this is acceptable, but I haven't spoken with anyone about this and wanted to share somewhere. As for goals, I was hoping to be under 300 by my birthday, but I missed it by 12lbs. I'd like to be under 250 by year's end.

tl;dr, Outrageously obese a little over a year ago, now quite obese, trying to get to not too bad.

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Anecdote while helping people after their house burned down. I tripped and almost fell.

Client: Careful! You're big. You fall down I don't know how we'll get you up. I mean, that's a lot of dead weight.

Me: Well, it's not all dead just yet.

Client: But damn, I doubt all of us could get you up.

Me: You could just hand me a rope and tie the other end to your SUV.

Client: Oh, well. We wouldn't do that.

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Last night, my (now ex) bf said it's difficult to be attracted to me because of my size...it only makes me want to work harder.

28F/5'9/CW: 239. GW:170. My apologies, it's a long post.

The last year and a half has been a roller coaster for me in terms of my health and my personal life. In June 2018, I was diagnosed with T2 diabetes at an A1C of 16. This came after I had lost 40 lbs in about 3 months due to how high my blood sugar was - I thought I was living a healthy life for that weight loss to happen, but I was not healthy. I had to be put on insulin and medication right away.

In July of that year, I met my (now ex) bf (29M) through mutual friends. He was (and is) going through his own weight loss journey. He met me when I was a lower weight and newly diagnosed. I did not hide my health struggles from him.

With the diagnosis, i began to work hard on my health. By January 2019, my A1C dropped just over 50%, bringing it to 7.9. (As of June, it is 7.5). I no longer needed to be on insulin, but just on one medication. At the same time, I had gained about 20 pounds in the process, since my body was getting back to running on a lower blood sugar. It did not matter, however, I wanted to pursue some fitness goals. I signed up for my first 10K and completed it in May. Right after, I signed up for my first half marathon, happening this October. He said that he was supportive of me in through all of this.

Cut to last night (NSFW).

I was at his apartment and we had sex, but he did not orgasm (He always has had some trouble in this area) and was being quiet. I asked him what is wrong and, eventually, he admitted that he is finding it difficult to be attracted to me because of my size, thinking that is why he is not able to orgasm easily. He has been feeling this way for at least a month.

I am really hurt by that, especially since it's only when I asked that he told me. He kept saying that he is sorry and that he was a horrible person for feeling this way. After talking this through, I decided to end the relationship. I did not turn to comfort food after, like I tend to do. I had a good cry and some tea.

This morning, I am more motivated than ever to reach my goals and to be healthier. With my A1C coming down and my half marathon in a few months, I am going to work hard on getting fitter and losing this weight in a healthy way. It doesn't matter what he thinks or what anyone else thinks, I am going to do right for me.

TL;DR: Last year, diagnosed with severe T2 diabetes, making me lose 40 lbs in 3 months. Ex-bf met me a month after diagnosis. As my A1C is going lower, I gained 20 lbs in the course of year, but have completed 10k and now training for half marathon. Ex bf told me he is not attracted to me due to my size. Broke up with him, going to kick ass for myself.

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My big fat stupid life in bullet points!

Do I need a tldr for a list of bullet points?

• -September 2018

•start of my senior year

•I weigh 300 lbs at 6 ft (highest I’ve ever weighed was 330.)

•I have lots of classes with this girl I like

•she’s out of my league

•she flirts with me

•I ask her out

•she says yes

•first relationship I’ve ever had so I decide to put effort into losing weight for the sake of our relationship. First time I was ever booming with confidence. Took weight more seriously than ever.

•things are great for like two months

•I’m running on an elliptical and eating right

•happier than I’ve ever been

• January 2019

• I weigh 280 (lowest I’ve weighed since 8th grade)

• Girl began to distance herself in November

•she was having problems with mental health

•regularly taking out her problems on me

(Background time-My mom was an abusive alcoholic. Physically and verbally. Now she’s just an alcoholic)

•Girl knows about my destructive homelife and uses that to take advantage of me the same ways my mom did. •Even after we stopped dating, she’d still mess with me.

•during this time I’m still working out daily and eating right. Still really motivated.

• My lowest weight in past couple of years is 270

-February 2019

•she’s finally gotten to me

•driving me to falling into old binging habits

•im working out less and less

•she stops talking to me all together

•even though she was evil and manipulative, she was my only friend at the time.

•I gain all of the weight back over time

-June 2019/July 2019

•I’ve been working at a movie theater for about 6 months

•really nice co-workers, I hit it off with all of them

•they become the closest thing I have had to friends since my ex.

•People genuinely told me they looked forward to working with me

•built up a reputation for being some type of clown or workplace comic

•in July I end up quitting

•my mother is on a mean streak and the money I make from work is paying for her booze

•I stay in contact with co-workers

•one in particular, was this girl that was really sweat.

•her and I began talking everyday

•I even came to see a movie (where we worked) and we ended up talking in the parking lot after her shift from 11 pm to 3 am. (Genuine conversation)

•we just joke and talk about our bad ex’s

•after this night I feel a genuine connection and I begin working out again. (Sparingly but still)

-this week

•I’ve been pretty depressed back and fourth

•still talking to that girl, but I get the impression she doesn’t like me

•we make plans three times to hang out

•she cancels because of good reasons each time, but nonetheless it’s disheartening

•I go to a party with her and a group of her friend (They really took me in as their own)

•Talking at the party she mentions she has off the next day

•later I bring up the movie “Midsommar” she says she wants to see it. So do I

•I tell her I’m seeing it the next day and I ask her “do you have off tomorrow?”

•she lies and says no, but then realizes we all know she has off.

•she backtracks and says she doesn’t want to spend her day off seeing a movie.(understandable she works there)

•next day I text her at 7:30 saying I’m planning on seeing Midsommar at 9:30 and I asked if she’d like to come with.

•she says yeah

•I feel really energized so I work out on the elliptical

•I feel like dying afterwords, borderline cardiac arrest

•I feel really confident and I make plans to buy my own dinner to make at home after the movie. Something healthy.

• -movie theater at 9:00

•I talk to my old co-workers

•they’re excited to see me

•I talk to them and we all have a good time

•it gets to 9:30 and I decide to wait in the movie for my friend who hasn’t arrived

•9:55 roles around and she’s still not here

•I assume she stood me up

•I assume right

•she texts me apologizing saying she just tried taking a nap and overslept.

•I’m not mad at her at all because she’s very nice she wouldn’t do this kind of thing on purpose

•nonetheless im still really sad

•I go to Walmart buy a shit ton of garbage food and binge till I get sick

•I go on reddit

•post on r/loseit

•not even looking for weight loss advice at this point, just someone to talk to.

•post is probably against the guidelines because of its lack of weight talk

•feels real bad man

Real bad.

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For me, emotions + stress = weight gain | How do I “reset?”

My story: I lost my spouse and also my dad to cancer less than two years apart. Until their diagnoses, I was a bit over weight but not “obese”.

My family and I immediately transitioned from a dual income household to me being the sole provider. I found myself facing high medical expenses, the eventual loss of not one but two very important people in my life, working full time while also being a caregiver, and raising a young teen all at the same time. I gained a significant amount of weight in a little over a year.

Current challenge: Now that both my spouse and dad have passed away, and the teen I mentioned is an adult and is on his own, for the last year plus, I turned my focus toward myself and finding my new normal. I have not been able to lose weight and keep it off.

My physical self has grown very fond of “survival mode,” apparently, and is holding onto the calories from every crumb that goes into my mouth. My emotional self reacts to stress in a manner which then encourages my physical self to remain in “survival mode”.

I am working with a physician, a dietician, and have tried a few different therapists in an effort to break the cycle. The good news is that there is no physical reason why I cannot lose weight.

Starting the beginning of this year, I track everything I eat. I have remained the same weight while staying within 1,400 calories a day (with very few exception days- one exception or “cheat” day every other month, to date). Because I walk a lot and liked the interface, I chose the “my fitness pal” app to track both food intake and physical activity. I have worked my way up to about 8,000 steps per day alternating a fast pace with a slow, leisurely pace on average. I recently added IF (16:8) to the mix. Sooner or later, I will find what works for me and will return to a healthy weight.

The reaction of others to my weight ranges from fat shaming to sympathy to encouragement. It is so easy for some to hide behind a keyboard/touch screen and criticize a person that they will likely never have to look in the eye.

Only those close to me (until now, anyway) know this story. I get the occasional snarky and judgmental comments while out on public. My favorite response is “Try burying your spouse and your dad within months of each other - then tell me how you’ve managed your weight!”

I have found folks who are physically active to be the very best in terms of offering words of encouragement and guidance when asked. The person who looks like a model and is less than 4% body fat is just as quick with a kind word as the person who looks just like me.

Though I like myself and enjoy spending time alone, I miss jumping in the car and heading to a baseball game or to the next town over to enjoy a favorite venue. I have tried online dating without great success. Though I have had many good chats and have also been on dates, in summary, it is easy to see and judge only the outer shell without a thought about the inner person and how/why they became what you see. After a few failed attempts, I discovered my self confidence is not ready to filter through the bots, filters, cat-fishing, etc., in order to meet someone who genuinely wants to be friends and partners.

Have I found the winning approach to weight loss? No. Am I going to quit trying? Absolutely not.

Healing after two great losses (dad: 2012 and spouse: 2014) is a journey. It took me awhile to find my new internal normal. Now I am focused on my new external normal. There are still days that I have to remind myself I am enough and I am worth the effort to become the best version of me!

I needed to write all of this out as much as I needed a reminder that motivation, for me, comes from within and is assisted by controlling my inputs.

Positive ideas and advice is appreciated and welcomed.

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