As the Saying Goes: "Weight Loss is the #1 Surgery"
Before you consider any plastic surgery to fix your facial insecurities, first see what you have to work with at your idea weight and body fat percentage. I know, I've encountered some people aren’t believers of losing weight to be prettier, but honestly I feel like fat can obstruct many halos. Face gains are so real.
Plus there is no harm in becoming healthier and feeling better/more energized! The most important lesson I've learned from becoming more health-conscious is that I can do anything!
Face Gains After Weight Loss
In the past year I went from 166lbs to 137lbs at 5’3”. That might not seem like a lot, but it really showed on my body because I'm short. I am also currently losing weight at a steady pace of 1-2lbs per week. I feel like weight loss alone fixed 6 of my insecurities. Of course I still want to lose some weight and get that chiseled jawline, but when I gain weight, it all goes to my face. So even if my body is relatively good, my face is so bloated. For example, these are a list of my insecurities caused by weight gain
- my face was super round from all that excess fat, and it was hiding my heart face-shape. (I have a chin now, and it's pointy!)
- my mouth looked very narrow, especially in relation to how wide my lower face was.
- my jawline was nonexistent (I also had a slight double chin)
- my face was flat/cheekbones nonexistent (the fat obstructed it)
- my nose looked less tall and sharp because the fat from my cheeks were hiding it (I’m Asian so I have a pretty flatish nose in the first place)
- the fat made my eyes smaller and I always looked tired because I have extremely hooded eyes and fat makes the hood heavier
Now that I lost weight, I have a more heart shaped face, my jawline shows, my mouth looks wider, my eyes look bigger (especially in relation to my now-smaller face) my nose looks sharper, and my eyes look a lot more awake and larger. I actually like my smile now, after so many years of disliking it because so many insecurities were magically fixed!
Of course everyone will have varying degrees of success, and some people's faces still look good, even with excess weight. But everyone looks better at a healthier weight than at an unhealthy weight.
How I Lost Weight:
a. Personal Backstory + Excuses
If you're anything like me, I was lazy about weight loss. I've been overweight since puberty, and never been obese. I still had a relatively good hourglass body and big boobs, and even when overweight, I was never terribly ugly. Weight loss was just so hard, and I used food to cope with emotional stress. I vaguely remembered being really pretty and popular with boys in middle school when I was skinny, but the longer I waited while being overweight, the more I forgot. I also didn't know how I would look post-puberty at a healthy weight, which was added onto my list of excuses.
This year, I moved to a more "body-conscious" country (Japan), and naturally lost the first 10-15 pounds within the first 3 months by virtue of eating a healthier Japanese diet. However, some of my insecurities were still somewhat present, such as my cheeks appearing flat, or my mandible looking narrow. However, the last 10 pounds were very intentional, as in quarantine, I had more free time and less stress.
b. "Skinny People Habits"
I've always wanted to lose weight, but quarantine was eyeopening. I ate dinner with my naturally skinny neighbor, and she cooked a lot of veggies with a very small portion of meat, and little to no oil. She barely ate rice/other carbs. She also liked fruits, but disliked sweets, fried foods, and overly salty foods. She likes walking and exercise, and when she's stressed, she doesn't eat (okay this is a bit unhealthy, but better than binging). Sometimes, she snacks in small quantities, or none at all. She made me realize that being skinny isn't some magic formula that can be just attributed to a "high metabolism" or "good genes". A lot of skinny people have a good relationship around food, and I wanted to learn that skill.
In the first month, eating dinner with her, I lost 10 pounds without thinking that I regained from vacation. However, when I didn't eat with her, I'd still order delivery, because I was lazy, and have a burger and fries every other night. Even so, I lost weight, by eating healthier with her. But slowly, I started to crave more veggies. I stopped eating so much rice. At one point, I made a conscious decision to start my "diet".
c. Mental Health and its Role in Weight Loss
As cliche as this is, I hate the word "diet". It really is a lifestyle change. In the past, I've always been yo-yo dieting, from periods of intense cuts, to regaining it all back and more, just a few months later. Hell, I was very close to developing an eating disorder every time I dieted. This time felt different, and I knew it.
Before anything, it is imperative that you work on your mental health and image around food before attempting to lose weight. In our society, fat people get a bad rep, but when you get to unhealthy levels of weight (overweight-obese), there are usually underlying mental health issues or bad food habits. Like me, many overweight people over eat to cope with stress. Likewise, some example of "fat people habits" is mindlessly snacking, snacking whilst bored, drinking their calories, or not really looking at/savoring what they eat. I knew something was wrong with me when I ordered a $100 kobe steak, and couldn't really distinguish the flavors from a regular steak because of how numb my taste buds were from mindlessly shoving junk food into my mouth all the time. This was a Michelin star, critically acclaimed restaurant. And before the naysayers say maybe it was this one restaurant, this wasn't the first incident something like this happened either. The previous time, I was treated to a really expensive tempura restaurant by a friend, and I didn't really like it, and preferred cheap, quantity dense meals at fast food chains. My taste buds were numb to subtleties in flavors, and they always craved fat and oils.
d. Good Food Habits
Next, it is important to get some good food habits. Here are some important habits that I learned to develop in no particular order
- Don't eat when bored, only eat at meal times or when truly hungry. (If intuitive eating works for you, go for it)
- Don't snack. (a bit controversial, but I feel as if snacking spikes my glucose levels and makes me hungrier. Remember, hunger is just a signal, and not urgent. If your next meal is in less than 2 hours or so, I suggest waiting it out)
- Drinking water. (sometimes your body mistakes your thirst signals for hunger signals)
- Corollary: do not drink your calories (obviously protein shakes are different if you are building muscle)
- Cut down on empty/non-nutritionally dense foods (refined carbs and sugars), attempt to cut out all added sugars as well. (This might also be controversial, but I find that sugar addiction is very real, and once I cut out sugar, I stopped craving sweets, and couldn't stand how sweet some foods were afterwards) Article about sugar addiction and how it is harmful
- Eat more protein and healthy fats to feel fuller longer. This includes Chicken Breast, Avocado, Salmon, etc. (I make sure to at minimum, the daily protein recommendation for a female of my weight, so I minimize muscle loss)
- Portion sizing. Eat the recommended portion sizes, or even less if you're not hungry! I feel like the American perception of portion sizes is so skewed because of
e. Exercising Mentality
As for exercise, I've always hated "working out for the sake of working out". Then I read about NEAT and how our body burns calories by doing small things like fidgeting, or moving around in our day to day life. So, knowing that, I aimed to increase my NEAT by fidgeting and moving around. I watch a lot of Netflix and YouTube recently, so I decided to stretch more while watching, or dance a little.
Likewise, the most helpful mindset was to get rid of my "all or nothing" mindset. In the past, I would get spikes of motivation, that would force me to go "all-out" on workouts, which made me miserable, so I'd quit after a few weeks. Remember: A little exercise is better than no exercise
Knowing that, this time I started out super slow. Instead of taking the bus, I started walking to the station. If I wanted to listen to a podcast, why not go out for a stroll while listening? I found that walking did not make me miserable, and slowly, I started increasing my walking distance and time.
It is important to find an exercise that works for you. If you hate it, there is little point in continuing, because exercise is meant to be enjoyable and sustainable for the rest of your life. Since losing weight is a lifestyle change, pick something that you can see yourself doing for the rest of your life. If you don't have one yet, it's okay! Some popular exercises are Pokemon Go, Kpop Dances, Spin Classes, Boxing, etc.
Maybe even walking makes you miserable. That is also okay! Slowly work your way up to a point where you're comfortable. Maybe do some light home exercises so you can build up endurance and start walking. Everyone starts at a different pace, so don't compare yourself to the super ripped out guy who can bench 1000lbs.
Also, You can't outrun a bad diet. If you are into diet tips, you probably heard this one many times before, but it is true. 20 minutes of jogging burns around 160 calories [1], that is barely a slice of cake, or less than half an Egg McMuffin. This video by AsapScience shows what 200 calories look like. After watching this video, I realized how much I overate, thinking that it "wasn't that many calories". I calorie count, but I don't count the calories I burned from exercising. This helps me ingrain the fact that I exercise strictly for the health benefits, not so that I can eat more food.
However, if you do more intense exercise, eat more to fuel your workouts! But it is better to eat more healthy foods and more protein to fuel your exercise, not a big mac, or a stick of butter.
f. weight-loss methods
Finally, we're at my weight loss methods (after so much rambling lol). I would recommend reading sections b-e if you haven't already, as you can't really skip out on the mental aspect of weight loss. However, here is what I did to actually lose weight
- Calorie Counting: weight loss comes out to CICO, so I make sure to stay under 1200 a day, which is appropriate for a short, lightly-active woman. If your TDEE is higher, eat more! 3500 calorie deficit = 1 pound lost, so adjust accordingly. I use a calorie counting app to easily record what I eat in a day. TDEE Calculator.
- HOWEVER, calories are not everything. It is better to eat more calories of healthy foods rather than less calories of nutritionally void foods. You still need to get an adequate amount of vitamins and protein every day, and if you don't, you risk a lot of health issues, which completely negates the positive effects of losing weight. If you don't eat enough protein, you will lose more muscle and become skinny fat. I think it is self explanatory what happens if you don't eat enough vitamins.
- Intermittent Fasting: I do a 16:8 IF Schedule (Fast everyday for 16 hours, and eat within an 8 hour schedule). This helps manage my emotional eating and hunger signals. By having a strict time to eat, I avoid over eating at late night. Also, if I have cravings, I tell myself I can eat it later, during my eating window. Surprisingly, if I wait a few hours,most of the time, my cravings completely go away.
- Low Carb: When I realized how useless some carbs were in my meals, I realized I could just cut it out. Mentally, for me, I realized most of my carbs did not add any value to the taste of my meal, and the meal tastes just as good if I removed that extra portion of rice, pasta, etc. If you like carbs, I would suggest going for smaller portions, or eating less processed carbs, such as whole wheat for digestion and fiber. Yes whole wheat bread is more calories, but actually has fiber and healthy nutrients. White Bread tastes good, but really does nothing for your body. I also wouldn't say avoid carbs, since they are important for your body to function, but just be mindful of the carbs you eat.
- No Added Sugar (at least for a short period of time): This is controversial, especially since I don't believe in an overly restrictive diet for a successful lifestyle change, but sugar is highly addictive. Just try it out for a few weeks and see how it happens. Everyone varies, but some benefits to being sugar-free are: no more headaches, higher energy, no sugar crashes, less cravings, etc. Some people (like me!) even found that their sweetness tolerance is much lower after being sugar free, and don't like sweets that much anymore. However, if you think your self-discipline is that high, I believe in you, go for that piece of cake, but in moderation. I still think doing sugar free for even a short while is beneficial, however.
- Don't overly restrict: This and the last two points seem completely the opposite, but hear me out. Since this is a lifestyle change, you have to be able to imagine yourself eating the same things you are eating during your diet for the rest of your life (just 500 calories more). Otherwise, it's highly likely you will rebound if you go back to your old eating habits after successfully losing the weight. If it is hard for you to give up pizza, don't. Just eat in moderation. If you want to cut something, start gradually cutting it from your diet. Start eating less at first, and replacing unhealthy foods with slightly less unhealthier alternatives. At first I switched from soda to diet soda, to not drinking sweet drinks at all. Try going from a large fries, to a medium fries, to a small fries, etc. (However, my point about sugar is different, because with addiction, it is better to cut it cold turkey until you heal from it.)
g. some helpful resources
In my weight-loss journey, I found that some resources were really helpful to help me stay on track. Here are a few of them
- r/LukeNarhwal this subreddit is about weight loss and linked to a Youtuber who reads reddit posts on YouTube about weight loss tips, stories, etc. Listening to his videos really helped me readjust my mentality around weight loss, and plus listening to him speak is hands free! I like to listen to his videos while walking or doing my chores. Luke Narhwal's Channel
- r/progresspics since I had no reference for what I would look like when I lost weight, looking at other people's success stories helped me keep motivated. Plus face gains are so real.
- r/1200isplenty This is a great sub for giving inspiration for yummy, low-cal meals.
- YouTube Videos of Diet Meals/What I eat in a day: Likewise, I like watching these videos to see what skinny people eat in a day, and get more inspiration for yummy healthy food. Did you know there are so many yummy Asian dishes low in calories, and chock full of veggies?
- Mukbang Videos: counter intuitively, when I watch people eat large amounts of food, it satiates my cravings. It apparently has something to do with watching other people finish a plate which sometimes signals to your brain that your full. At least for me, I like the idea of eating more than the food itself since when I actually eat, it's not as great as a remember/imagine it. Watching others eat scratches that itch for me. However everyone varies, so if it makes you hungry skip this.
- r/sugarfree this sub helps me cut excess sugar from my diet. However, adjust accordingly for your life style. Some people here even advocate to cut out fruit, which I don't agree with but can understand why.
- r/loseit last but not least, this sub! I find that it is helpful to read about people going through the same struggles as you are!
Thank you for reading my post! If there is anything that is vague, or I forgot to add, let me know!
