Hey guys. I know I'm guilty of constantly telling myself "ok, this is the week I'm gonna change things!" Then I have a bad day, and it turns into "I'll try next week." Obviously it never really ends up happening. But lately I've been feeling gross. I'm a 19 year old girl in college, so everyone around me is naturally super skinny and wears their LuluLemon leggings with crop tops and catches the attention of all the guys on campus. It makes me feel so horrible about myself. It really hit me this weekend how bad it's gotten. I went to Spirit Halloween and all the costumes there were some kind of body suit or a "sexy (insert character here)." I knew I'd look absolutely disgusting in any of those costumes and just didn't even go out this weekend. Now we have a staff meeting for my job on Wednesday where we're supposed to dress up, and I have no idea what to do.
Growing up, my parents never had a scale in the house. They always said they knew that young girls will obsess over their weight too much... and I know there's some truth to that, but I need a quantitative way to tell that I'm actually losing weight before my clothes start to fit me differently, because I know that takes a while. So I decided to go buy a scale today and weigh myself for the first time in years.
I've been through this process before. I was that kid who went to Weight Watchers meetings when she was 15 while everyone else in the room was 50. And you know what? It worked pretty well. I lost a decent amount of weight doing that. But I gained a bunch when I came to college and I just feel terrible. For reference, here are my stats:
Age: 19
Gender: Female
Height: 6' 1"
Weight: 210 lbs
I know I have the ability to do it. In 2019, I was about the same height and got down to 151 lbs. I looked great, but I had no idea at the time. I couldn't even recognize at all that my body had changed in the slightest. But now I look back on old pictures and would do anything to look that way again. I also really just want to get a good start this semester, kick it into high gear over Christmas break, lose weight slowly but steadily throughout spring semester, then have a big glow up over the summer. I want to come back at the beginning of next year and shock everyone.
The thing about weight loss thats really hard for me is that I'm also extremely tall. Most people can say "oh look, I went from a size XXL to an M! I've done so well!" But that doesn't happen for me. Even at my lowest weight, I was wearing L and XL clothing because I'm just so unnecessarily tall.
I recently bought a water bottle that I'm really excited about, so I've been drinking a lot of water and plan to continue to do so throughout my weight loss journey. I'm cutting sodas and essentially anything outside of water and occasionally milk. I'm gonna definitely limit my sweets and carbs as much as is realistic. I have a meal plan as a student, and the cafeteria has a salad bar, so that's helpful. I've been to the rec center on campus a few times, but it's just so embarrassing around all the other college students. My job makes me walk a lot, so I get a good 5 miles of walking in every day.
Any tips that anyone else has are much appreciated. I just want to stop feeling miserable about myself.
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