I still don’t know what to do with myself. Tonight I ruined what could have been a great relationship because of one stupid comment. I had gone on four dates with this guy and things were going pretty well. Tonight I had him over for dinner, I had prepared sushi and baked salmon and had worked really hard to make a nice dinner.
Things were going well until after dinner he made a small comment and I took it personally. I have lost 50lbs at this point so I am not close to my goal of 100lbs lost but I have made significant progress. I am still slightly overweight but I still think I have an overall medium figure. I honestly forget what his comment was but it was thoughtless and I should have been more forgiving, but instead I took it very personally. After talking for a bit about my insecurities he was honest with me and said that he thinks I’m overweight but hasn’t minded up until now. I was hurt by this, I know I’m still working towards my goal but hearing it so blatantly from someone I really liked just stung. After this, he said he was put off by my reaction and didn’t feel he could see this continuing in the future. I really liked him and am absolutely heartbroken. I have no good photos of myself which makes it annoying to find matches on dating apps much less someone actually interested in a relationship.
I don’t know what to do. I’m in a place now mentally where I don’t ever want to look at food again and just work myself to the bone until I finish losing the weight. I’m never going to be happy or attractive until I reach my goal weight. Tonight feels like all my deepest insecurities about myself have come to life. I honestly don’t know what to do with myself now because I know that weight loss takes time but I’m absolutely miserable in the state that I am now.
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