Saturday, October 30, 2021

Weight loss, and physical/mental health

This is going to be a rambly one, you've been warned.

At 250lb I was seeing my doctor for various health issues, both physical and mental, my doctor put a lot of it down to my weight. Yes, I was obese, but not morbidly obese, I never felt like my weight was much of a problem. 50lb lighter, now almost at 200lb, my physical health is worse than ever, my mental health feels as if it's getting worse by the day.

I have trust issues from being cheated on after a 6 or so year long relationship, and it effects every aspect of my life. I've said it before, but at the beginning of my weight loss journey, I had a vision of myself, at my goal weight (183lb), with significantly less physical health issues, and an improved mental well-being. Now I'm so close to that goal, I know that's not going to happen.

I get therapy, but only two sessions a month, as that's all I can afford. I haven't been able to make a new friend in years, and I'm starting to push people further and further away from me. Even though the doctors still don't take me seriously, it's nice to not feel disgusted when I see my reflection anymore, at least most the time anyway.

Thank you for reading the rambly rambles of a madman 🙏

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