I'm afraid my weight management doc isn't a good fit for me, anyone been there?

I've had two appointments so far, one on the 23rd coming up. I will say she gave me access to a GREAT weight loss program with videos and informative handouts - however, the videos are made by her and her staff and they can be a bit too "guilt/you need to be in diet mode" but this is for weight loss so I understand that. She also has me in physical therapy for my fibromyalgia and it's been great, I love my physical therapist and she's been awesome helping me to find exercises that are challenging but not too much for me.

I came in expressing that I didn't want to have a list of things to eat vs not eat because that doesn't work for me - macros are tough for me and I would rather tweak the diet I have now instead of eating totally differently to lose weight. What does she do? Give me a list "eat a shake or bar for breakfast and lunch, one from this category, this category, and this category for dinner. No bread, no pasta." I asked why I couldn't do whole wheat pasta and she said "that's for after weight loss." Like, I JUST told you that restrictions like that won't work for me? It was all about no carbs, high protein, meal replacements.

Then, she got really upset about what time I eat - my boyfriend comes home at 10 and we eat at 10:20ish-11 and are in bed at 1 or 2, that's just our lifestyle. She tried to get me to eat before he gets home every night and tried to give me a cutoff because "it's very bad if you eat too late, it makes it harder to lose weight." As far as I know, that's literally not true, it doesn't matter when you eat. Also she kind of made me feel bad about having a "second-shift" lifestyle (which was honestly kind of triggering to me because I had a therapist I quit with after two sessions because she mocked and belittled me for "going against nature" with my sleep schedule and that's literally all she wanted to talk about). I just find it really bizarre she got so hung up on that, because it's not like I'm binging at night, I'm just eating dinner.

I feel really guilty and embarrassed about not doing everything exactly as she wants, but I'm going to try and talk to her about what I've said here. I'm just afraid she'll think about not committed if I say "this isn't the way I need to do things." Is it just me or does she seem to have outdated ideas about weight loss? Am I just not giving this enough of a try?

I want to do this, but I'm not necessarily trying to drop a lot of weight super fast, I'm trying to lost weight by changing my lifestyle.

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Struggling to get back into losing weight after ED (tw: severe restrictive eating)

Hi everyone, I've been subscribed here for a while, but this is my first post. I've always had a really unhealthy relationship with food, and I would frequently overeat to feel happy. This obviously caused me to have weight issues from the time I was really young. When I finally decided to do something about it, I lost about 150 lbs in about a year. The issue is that to achieve that weight loss, I severely restricted my calories. I'm talking 500 or under. A good day was when I would eat about 200 total. If I didn't, I'd get super anxious and would turn to not so great coping mechanisms. I also ended up really sick because of this. I maintained the weight loss for a while until 2020 when I had a series of really traumatic things happen, and I returned to binge eating to cope and gained it all back really fast.

I really want to get back into losing weight and being healthier, the only problem is that when I try and start restricting calories at a healthy amount, I really want to slide back into my old habits and its really hard to resist doing so, so I usually end up just avoiding calorie counting all together and end up overeating so I don't lose any weight.

Has anyone had a similar experience or any advice?

By the way, I did see a nutritionist for a while, but it wasn't super helpful. I've also gone to some therapy for this issue, but I am not currently in therapy because of long waiting lists in my area/lack of mental health care professionals.

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What should my exercise routine look like?

Hi guys! I am 21F, 103kg, 167cm and my goal weight is around 63kg.

I am currently doing CICO and slowly introducing more exercise.

The thing is, I want to lose a lot of weight before gaining muscle but from online videos I’ve seen women who are doing weight lifting at the early stages of their weight loss journey.

I do not want my fat to turn to muscle so I just want to know, what should my exercise schedule look like?

I am going swimming 3 times a week and currently doing no weight lifting. I have a bike/elliptical at home so I have been doing a bit of that to strengthen my legs slightly.

Any advise is welcome! :)

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Weight Loss & Dating

Curious if anyone has thoughts here. I’ve been waiting my whole adult life to lean into finding a partner — waiting to get out of debt, for my career to be well-established, for my work-life balance to be better, and on and on — and haven’t been lucky enough to run across someone in the wild.

Now my instinct is to wait until I’ve lost weight to date… it’s so hard to imagine someone looking at my pictures — or me in real life — and actually seeing ME, not just a big lady. It’s certainly all I see when I look at myself. But it could take a year to get to a weight I’m happy with (if I succeed at all… which I’m hopeful about, but deeply afraid of being certain — itself perhaps fodder for another post on another day).

There are so many other parts of my life I’m happy with — really everything EXCEPT my weight — and finding a partner is very important to me. So I want to override my instinct to wait. One thing has become abundantly clear in recent years: life is too damned short. But I’m still just… afraid.

I suppose I’m not exactly sure what I’m looking for with this post… if anyone has met their person while heavier, I’d really love to hear some success stories. Or even tactics for meeting people, or how (or whether?) to acknowledge weight on these apps… my nightmare would be getting to a point of meeting and being rejected on the spot, but I also don’t imagine leading with “Hi I know I’m large but here’s my calorie deficit plan, TDEE calculation, peloton FTP, and current deadlift max!” is a great idea.

If it’s relevant, I’m a 30-something straight female.

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I am struggling.

I’ve lost 103 pounds officially, but I’m struggling significantly with body dysmorphia. I am trying to figure outfits out for a trip and I look at my loose skin and I just can’t even imagine wearing shorts or tank tops, which in Florida weather, would be perfect, right?

I am working out consistently, I am eating right and I still just cannot look at myself and feel proud with how badly my skin and body looks. Despite the weight loss, I still feel like I look super obese. I don’t know how to challenge this body dysmorphia when it’s this bad right now.

Yes I’m in therapy. Yes I’m on meds. Yes, I’m working through it. But right now, idk. I just need to vent because no one else understands the struggle I’m going through right now and I’m just…really fucking sad.

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Reverse dieting, refrain from doing a lot of cardio, “95%” etc (Girl Fit Method Podcast)

I’ve been listening to the Girl Fit Method Podcast for a while and enjoyed it but some things came up that I find questionable. I’m not a fitness/weight loss expert, so I may be mistaken, but I’m interested to know what others think.

1. The host referenced the “95% of diets fail”. I just am not a fan of this stat because it’s not proven. She didn’t use this to argue against weight loss but the fact that she quoted it irked me.

2. Talk of “reverse-dieting” … maybe I just don’t understand it, but I feel sceptical about it. Does anyone have experience of trying this/can verify it actually works?

3. In an episode she encouraged listeners to only use cardio to help weight loss in the later stages of weight loss. She said that it should only be used sparingly and in small amounts and that the majority should be resistance / weight training. I might be biased but in my experience cardio such as running and walking has been a staple in my weight loss and has helped me to lose and keep off more than 15kg. I agree strength training is important but I doubt it is the most effective way to burn calories.

I am anticipating that I may be wrong about some things but I’m really open to talk with anyone that is well versed in these topics. For the most part I do enjoy the podcast but more things begin to surface that seem iffy to me.

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It feels like everything this past week has been super high calorie

Before Christmas, I was crushing my food goals, and was super consistent. Since then though, every day I’m over my caloric goals. Granted, I’m not incredibly serious about calorie counting. I’ve put on like 5 pounds since Christmas time, and it seems like there isn’t a meal I eat where I’m not disappointed. I have had a lot of events happen, like new years, my sisters engagement, and my birthday today. Like, I had a bowl of chili at chilis, and I come to find out it had 600 calories in it? Wth? I’ve only eaten one meal and I’ve eaten 1300 calories, which is like 80% of my daily goal. Time to go for a walk, I guess. Hopefully this seems to end soon, as it’s not sustainable for weight loss. Have a good day

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