Nothing seems to replace junk food as a calming mechanism...

I typically have the strongest urge on my way home from work to eat crap in order to "decompress" my anxiety.

I've tried things like HITT, weight lifting, taking a walk, drinking water, playing videogames, marijuana, meditation, eating something healthy instead, but nothing takes the "edge off" like 1000 calories of junk. If I delay it with one of the above methods, I just feel like I'm pushing it out and my mind still desperately wants it - willpower always breaks eventually. I might make it a day, but never long term.

Ugh.. Writing this out makes me feel like an addict. I don't even want a magic weight loss pill- I want a pill that makes me treat food as fuel.

I've been thinking about going to therapy again and asking to try an antidepressant, but I'm nervous. Will it cause me to just gain more? Will I become dependent and unable to get off of it? Will it change who I am? Will it have long term side effects?

Thanks for reading this far.

submitted by /u/wondering_person
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