24/M My regular is 6-8 beers a day at least 5 days a week. 6’3” 226 lbs. Last week on Monday I went out with a buddy of mine who drinks heavily as much as I do/did. We went out at 2 pm after work and after I had a few tequilas we went to another bar for a few more and finally hit our third for a few more. I came back to my apartment where my girlfriend and son live with me and I was blacked out after I ate the curb. I never hurt her or my son only myself. For months on and off I would battle myself and my girlfriend that hasn’t spend a day sober since she was 20 besides when she was pregnant. (She’s now 29) and nothing was getting better cause she wouldn’t stop drinking if I asked to do it together. I’ve trained my liver too much that’s why I could drink that hard on a Monday and pretty much every single day. I decided to be the piece of shit she always said I was and get blacked out due to my sadness and anger. And I ended up feeling more disappointed in myself than I ever have.. I’m a great employee, I think I’m a great father and I do anything I can to help her out and anyone else who calls for it.. But I never feel happy or complete so I drink. It is now a week and one day since I had a drink and today I decided to run a mile through the neighborhood without stopping in 8:15 and walked another half mile back home for the first time since high school and that wasn’t enough so I did another mile running/walking on the treadmill at my complex. I feel great sitting here in my damp hoody and sweatpants with sore legs. I want to keep this going but I have my doubts in the back of my head. Looking for advice and encouragement on mental health fitness as much as physical fitness. I’m tired of feeling like a loser, an alcoholic and a flat out weak bitch. Any advice helps. And some of your weight loss/mental strengthening stories I can take from would be appreciated. I need it, bad. Sorry for the long post. I don’t know where else to express this.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3auZ5T5
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