(Marking as NSFW for the subject matter)
I’m 17 years old, 5’7 and weigh 188 lbs. People wouldn’t exactly call me fat, but I’m still a bit overweight and absolutely NOT happy with my body. Never have been.
I’ve looked up all the advice I could get. Tried eating less, eating healthier. Recently I started counting calories. I actually do exercise a lot, but of course it doesn’t do anything since my diet sucks.
The problem is my mom. She doesn’t allow me to get far anywhere. All the food in our house is extremely unhealthy and not good for my weight loss, and she refuses to buy anything that I actually can eat. This often results in me binge eating out of stress, or starving myself for the day.
It doesn’t help that recently my depression has been acting up this past week specifically because of my body. I often think about getting surgery to reduce my weight. I’m always beating myself up, both physically and mentally, because I can’t even stand looking at myself anymore. At one point I’ve considered suicide about it. It’s becoming a big problem because now I’m trying to lose tons of weight in mere weeks, why? ….To impress a friend/crush I haven’t seen in 3 years.
It’s not that I haven’t made progress. It’s that it isn’t enough in the slightest. I used to be a little over 200 lbs, but why even care? Every time I take a shot at losing weight I’m only ever fluctuating between 180 and 200 lbs. The results aren’t visible and I still want to vomit at the sight of myself.
So what do I do? How can I possibly make make progress when my mother’s always trying to inhibit it? I’m running out of options.
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