The before picture was taken at my sister’s wedding in 2016. I was at my lowest weight of 127 in 2014, but that was a year that I experienced a lot of trauma. After a series of unfortunate events that sent me deep into depression and alcoholism, I had gained 100 lbs exactly. I remember stepping on the scale a week before the wedding in 2016 at the age of 21 to see the number 227 on the scale. I knew something had to change. I felt like I had completely lost myself. I did not even recognize my reflection in the mirror. I saw an obese, utterly broken girl looking back and it hurt my heart so much not only for what she’d endured but for how she seemed to have disappeared completely and transformed into... something else.
The first thing I did was become vegan. I had spent my whole life as a vegetarian so it wasn’t that hard of a change for me. (I actually started eating meat for the first time in my life later on in my journey) Being vegan was very limiting and limited the food I could eat, which forced me to be more mindful of what I was eating. I lost the first 40 lbs this way. Eventually I got sick of being so limited and decided to add dairy products back into my diet and this triggered a 3-4 month long binge session of all the foods I previously cut out of my diet. I regained about 15 lbs and spent about a year and a half stuck at 170-185.
The real change occurred when I started eating meat in late 2018 and strictly sticking to a CICO diet with no food limitations. Then in May of 2019 I moved 2200 miles from home and started a new life. I was far away from toxic and abusive people and I really started to thrive. I dropped another 40 lbs and had no binge urges or regaining. I joined a gym and started working out consistently which is still a huge part of my life. I got into school finally and am working on my paramedic degree which has been a lifelong dream of mine. Today I weighed in at 148, and originally I could not imagine ever being back in the 140’s. This was my original goal but now I want to get into the 120’s.
You guys I’m just so happy! I feel like I’ve taken control back, and I can’t believe how much better life has gotten. I wish I could go back in time and tell thank that girl for not giving up. Life does get better. No matter what, it isn’t over yet.
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